clown car behavior

all movies are for children because the moving image is inherently juvenile. to be entertained by it even moreso

so i put my hands up theyre playing my song the evil skull flies away

Please know that second one is about him being locked out of his instagram account for 15 minutes

Why is he better at this than me

guy who has only ever experienced shadows on the cave wall, finally perceiving the world as it truly is: getting a lot of shadows on the cave wall vibes from this

reminder that coming up with some fake little dudes and creating intricate storylines in your head is a completely free and fun way to pass the time and the government can't stop you

What they aren't telling these kids that's really dangerous is that if you do make it all the way to the heart of a Scientology building, the autosave will lock you into entering the Tom Cruise boss fight chamber, and you won't be able to leave until you defeat him in combat.

lesbian scifi is so easy. here’s a woman in cargo pants and a tank top on a spaceship. are you with me

maybe it’s not even cargo pants. maybe it’s coveralls rolled to + tied around the waist. maybe she even has fuckoff boots

anyway they should invent a global food system that doesnt rely on slave labour

Strange racists and homophobes on the internet seem to have access to an alternate way cooler version of TV than me. "every white character on TV is in an interracial relationship" "every show has a gay couple in it" "main characters keep having to secretly be bisexual and nonbinary" "every show has gratuitous full frontal nudity" like damn promise?? What channel???

fucking hate texting dracula i'll send him a funny meme and he'll call me to be like "i need to take a SCREAMshot on my HELL phone" like oh my god we get it youre scary

"life is so hard for men because *starts describing the events of a mafia city ad*"