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Kim je hyuk would never 😔👎🏼

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snorlaxatives

good morning cruel world

the-little-engine-that-couldnt

Don’t you mean goodbye?

snorlaxatives

no i meant good morning. this world may be cruel but i’m still kickin’

josephbrassey

“Haha remember when murder-hornets were gonna be a thing? What a nothingburger.”

Yes, because the Washington state government activated like a sleeper-cell and ruthlessly, systematically hunted them down and annihilated them.

“Y2K came to nothing amirite?”

Yes because an army of software engineers working around the clock, losing sleep, and busting ass till the last minute prevented it from happening.

“Remember the hole in the ozone layer?”

You mean the one that was fixed through rigorous world wide government action?

One of the root problems of our society is a refusal or inability by media to articulate that all those “it’s gonna be an apocalypse” disasters were not disasters because we collectively did something about them.

The good news is this is actually quite correctable. I maintain my firm belief that we as humans are capable of solving almost all of our problems, when we decide to do so.

And I still think that’s going to happen. I don’t know when or how, but I do know that abandoning hope won’t help bring it about.

And I refuse to let the cynics own a chunk of my heart.

depsidase

dungeonmastersconsortium

"I don't have a choice, I'm just following orders"

Have you considered smoking one (1) joint?

dungeonmastersconsortium

Like, it truly is that easy to not go do atrocities

"I'll get dishonorably discharged"

Okay at least you wont be killing innocents in the name of imperialism

"I'll go to jail"

Okay so you'd rather go and kill innocent people to avoid a little prison time? You could just go to jail rather than go do atrocities

elf-trash

if Taylor Swift Updates (legend, icon) can do this then so can you

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depsidase

pangur-and-grim

sometimes when I’m having a quiet moment with Pangur or Grim, I think “oh fuck what have I done” (re: the incoming kitten) because there’s a specific kind of loving calm you have with old animals that have spent their lives with you, and I don’t want to ruin that. and then other times Pangur and Grim will bother me out of boredom and ignore all their toys, and in those moments I say “heed my words, ye heathens, and despair, for I am bringing a tiny kitten to attack you. you will look back on this present boredom with gratefulness, because chaos is coming to your lands”

pangur-and-grim

they have no idea that their quiet lifestyle will end on Friday

pangur-and-grim

yeah

but it all worked out

pangur-and-grim

he does genuinely hunt me for sport when I’m walking around the house

pangur-and-grim

over the holidays my brother’s fiancée came up to me all concerned and was like “Belphie just ran up to me really fast, lightly bit my ankle, and then ran away. does he hate me?” and I had to be like no, no you are just his friend now, and unfortunately being his friend enters you into the most dangerous game

boethiah

no such thing as wasting your 20s your 20s are for recovering from whatever the fuck happened to you as a kid so that youre ready to get weird with it in your 30s

hellsitegenetics

String identified: c tg a atg a cg at t c a t a a tat a t gt t t

Closest match: Lomographa temerata genome assembly, chromosome: Z Common name: Clouded Silver

(image source)

gean-grey-blog

One time I was leaving a friend's place and an older lady with basically no English came up to me and communicated that she was very cold and needed a ride. She pointed to tell me where to go.

I got there and her daughter or granddaughter came out and was like omg her phone died we were worried

And then the older lady said something and the younger lady translated.

"She knew she could trust you because you have pink hair"

I thought it was funny at the time. But when I think back on it I think she was basically saying "you had a visible sign of not vibing with the system I was afraid of"

Be weird. Be colorful. Help random people.

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shutyourmoustache

hostilemakeover

g00seg1raffe

Holy fuck you illegally downloaded a cardigan

roguebombshell

Dang. The skill needed to know how to use all of those machines, the vision, the planning. Wowzers.

catchymemes

blondejaneblonde

Okay, but I would pay extra for this driveway.

naamahdarling

Um, can I please get every neighborhood kid and animal to come walk across my driveway? Can I get a cat to just run around on there? This flock of ducks did such an amazing job!

goddamnshinyrock

I was 18 months old when my parents built their house. After pouring the concrete slab for the foundation, my father, world’s most sentimental man, carried me down into the hole so he could preserve a single imprint of my little baby foot in the house he was building for me to grow up in.

Naturally, I wriggled loose, so what is actually preserved for posterity in my parents’ basement floor is my mad dash through this glorious new mud pit, followed by my father’s footprints in hot pursuit, a visible scuffle where the fugitive was captured, and then my father’s prints returning to the ladder.

gallusrostromegalus

I hope some future archeologist finds your parent’s basement floor because they’re going to lie down on the ground and cry about it.

I am in HYSTERICS

seal point

also omg want some sad news 😞 so in my family there’s like…..a genetic history of going totally white-haired in your twenties. and guess what finally struck me this year

pangur-and-grim

what is thilf??? Them I’d Like To Fuck?

pangur-and-grim

what’s a Thranduil?? is this gen z slang?

pangur-and-grim

NOOOO NOT THE NICHOLAS CAGE ELF

pangur-and-grim

for a solid half second I forgot hair dye was a thing & thought you were saying I could kill myself if I didnt like grey hair

pangur-and-grim

ive been informed that the man above is not Nicholas Cage, but in my defence they both have eyebrows

deepfriedanon

Are you suggesting most people don’t have eyebrows?

pangur-and-grim

please you have to understand

punkenglishnerd

Unpopular opinion: Being intelligent isn’t an excuse for being unkind.

stns-classics

Pretentious asshole is OUT! Pretentious Sweetheart is IN! Wearing dapper clothes and holding the door open for others makes you feel COOL AS H*CK! Glance up from your hefty books to give a stranger a smile!! Quote literature to inspire others! Be presumptuous in the way that you presume that everyone needs their day to be a little brighter!!!

representationthirst

Administration showed us this tweet on day one of grad school and boy did it hit home

biglawbear

“distinguished yourself by being kind” is my literal life motto at work, holy shit

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hollowedskin

So the funniest difference between me and kiddo's previous foster mother is that she was telling me I've gotta call ahead and make sure all the staff at the hairdressers know kiddo is trans so they don't misgender him, and make sure they know he's a foster kid so they understand why it's me taking him and not his real mum and all that, and I've just said nah that's not how you do it.

I go to the barber, I say "my son would like a haircut", they do not question me about whether he is my son on either point. This has worked perfectly so far. You just don't give anyone a reason to question you? If I say he is my son it is so unbelievably rude for someone else to go "um are you sure?".

But yesterday the barbers apprentice looked at him and asked if he is getting a woman's cut, and instead of arcing up and explaining trans theory and respect for kiddos gender to someone who I knew heard me the first time and had clocked him, I just channeled the spirit of a Christian Mother In The Toy Aisle and said "well, he is a boy so no, he will have a boys cut".

Shuts down bullshit immediately! Nobody wants to be yelled at by someone's Karen mother! Kiddo does not hear this little pricks opinion on trans people or get humiliated by being outed in the barbers. You do not have to tell people all your intimate details! You certainly do not have to tell people all your kids intimate details either, especially if you think they'll be a target.

hellish-undeath

i love my fans 💚

(for context anon (blank account) is trying to figure out how to misgender me)

hellish-undeath

she's been trying to guess my gender for 3+ hours so now we're talking about eels 💚

hellish-undeath

someone doesn't seem very excited to find out why i'm trans :/

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