Life, The Universe and Anything

“ Wellcome To Jurasic World “ // danimunozlandin

And even though money is pretty tight for her, she told me I could name my price if I would help her, because it was so far away.

I told her she was a dummy for thinking i would take her money but that i would accept the traditional helping-a-friend-move price: a meal (i know she would feel wrong about herself if she didn’t do something for me in return, that’s just how she is) Tradition suggests pizza and beer, we opted for enchiladas and a margarita.

we crashed on the floor of the empty place and left back north in the morning - when we got back to the city three more friends met us at her storage place (the place she was moving into wouldn’t be vacant for a couple months) and we started to move all her stuff up to a storage room on the THIRD FLOOR (because large city storage places be like that)

we had just taken the first box out of the truck when the (only) lady working there walked by and told us they closed in an hour and twenty minutes, and she couldn’t stay even a little late because she had to get to her other job.

One hour twenty minutes. To completely un-jenga a large uhaul and re-tetris it back into a similar sized room on the third floor.

We all just, shared a look, took off hoodies, and got the fuck down to business. 

It was actually.. I still cherish look we passed around. The tiny eyebrow quirks and chin nods. The eye glints. The bigger breath we each took as we prepared to kick it up several gears. That moment of wordless connection, when we all just silently agreed that we were damn well going to do the impossible and didn’t even waste the time it would take to say anything, just got to it.

And we did it too. Finished with exactly two full minutes to spare. And then we all went for dinner and drinks to celebrate. And my friend’s friends that came to help? Two of them were acquaintances/friends of mine already. Like I lived with one for a year a decade ago sort of thing. But this experience? Brought us all closer. Made myself a new friend too.

And the friend i helped move? She and I are closer than ever because of it.

When i left our storage success diner to go home, she asked me again if I was sure i wouldn’t take any money.

I said “I ever tell you when I was 22 I went down to Hollywood to try that scene out? Anyway ten months later, when I just couldn’t do it anymore, and needed to come back, I called one of my best friends and said i can’t do this anymore i need to come back. You know what he said? He said: I’ll be there tomorrow. Not how much will you pay me, not what do i get out of it, not will you be able to cover my gas, just: I’ll be there tomorrow. Okay? You’re my friend. If you need help, I’m going to be there”

a) Never again in your life will you have the chance for this kind of god-tier ninth-level casting of Malicious Compliance

“You mean you locked up a pack of curious, highly competitive persistence predators with NO enrichment in the enclosure? You FOOLS! If you had bothered to throw a basketball or half a box of Legos in there, KE-X9 would still be alive!

Like they’re totally unable to figure out what’s happening because the cameras keep going out, but every night things get moved, or stolen, exhibits are disappearing, WHAT IS GOING ON, they’ve moved facilities twice and it’s still happening, are they haunted, are the ancestors angry, WHAT IS HAPPENING!?

And then a weary humanologist is all ‘… your humans are getting out’. 

“That is impossible.” 

“They’re getting out.” 

“That enclosure is COMPLETELY SECURE.” 

“And yet somehow they’re getting out.” 

“THE HUMANS ARE NOT GETTING OUT.” 

“Oh yeah? I bet you twenty glarks they’re getting out. Stay after closing time with me and I’ll show you.” 

*next day*

“… the humans were getting out.” 

“… why did they keep going back in, then?!”

So I gave it a go.

Our lesson for the day was on historical re-enactments and why people did them. My students, having not read their assignments, couldn’t understand why anyone would want to engage in a re-enactment and didn’t understand the point. So I set them up with this game, explained the rules, told them they had 45 minutes to make the largest group without a witch in it, and let them go.

Within thirty minutes they were getting loud enough that I was worried I’d need to tone it down because I didn’t want to bother other classes. Some students went full in character, they created elaborate backstories, they improved their way through the entire thing and in the last five minutes had created an entire imaginary community based on this elaborate tale they’d created and were damn near ready to commit murder, screaming “she’s a witch” and splitting into two distinct groups with a lot of hand grabbing and pulling to get people into the right group.

When I told them the truth, they were stunned speechless. I reminded them of the rules: all they had to do was make a group without a witch in it. I never told them someone would be a witch, and they presumed someone would get the role. Similarly, the salem witch trials presumed that there were witches and invented them in their group.

They told me after we did our wrap up that they had been learning about the witch trials in other classes, but had never understood why anyone would actually believe in witchcraft. They were shaken, not only by the realization they were about to throw hands with their fellow students, but that all it took was someone in authority to imply something was so.

The “re-enactment” helped them to understand something that just reading about the trials hadn’t.

And, it also helped them to understand why some people do engage in historical re-enactments. They all admitted to having A Lot of Fun and that it was something that gave them a chance to just play and engage and do something they’d never done before: actually experience the history they were studying (sort of).

When Doc finds out he freaks out and panicks and makes blog posts (because of COURSE Doc runs a blog) talking about how UTTERLY RIDICULOUS the idea of a time travelling rock star is, which the internet finds hilarious and only makes the meme spread more.

Here's Jeff he sat in a hut for 8 days waiting for a female bird of paradise to arrive so the male he's been stalking will do a dance for her. Here's a dude we made him climb a giant guano hill with bugs in it and he's begging the director to say their shot is okay so he doesn't have to climb it again. We put this guy with a fear of heights on a hot air balloon with a Frenchman and they promptly crashed into a tree.