Rubies of Truth

I Don’t Need You to Talk Crap About My Ex, but Thanks

This is not a drama post. In fact it’s the opposite. It’s a reminder that people truly don’t have to choose sides.

My ex and I divorced 14 years ago. That’s a long time. But sometimes, people still want to talk “crap” about him to me, as if it proves something, as if it means that we are connected because we hate the same person.

But I don’t hate him. Not anymore. That ship has sailed and has…

Grooming the Next School Shooter

Being kind to someone, especially those who are “difficult” or moody people, is NOT just the absence of being “mean” to them.

Rather it’s SEEING them, sometimes going out of your way to have an opportunity to encourage them, and making the effort to recognize their pain.

We talk a lot about bullies, mental illness in teens and about preventing suicide, and we think it means only to, do no harmbut…

Finding Your Long-Lost Humanity, in Just 1 Week

Well, the title might be a little lofty, but follow me anyway.

I have been dealing with some stuff. And we all deal with some stuff. Yet lately my stuff seems so heavy and prevalent that it’s hard for me to even see the world around me. And I have become a hermit. Girls, sometimes just dealing with life is just way too flipping hard.

It’s easy to do (becoming a hermit, that is). I mean, I don’t…

7 Highs+Lows of Our 7th Year Married

Dear Hubby,

Sorry this is a few days late. This has been a janky week. Now that we got the house in order and tackled that linen closet we have been talking about for two years, I can write you a little anniversary letter:

Every year of life, and of marriage, seems jam packed. But it also seems completely mundane and the same in a way. Not in a bad way, but the busyness of life can make it feel…

i Love Me. I Love Me Not.

Self love sounds weird.

At least it did to me when I was barely double digits and a woman at a church I was uncomfortably visiting with my slumber party pal suggested that I should “love myself.”

Love myself? What in carnation was this nut-job talking about?

I knew how to love pizza and chocolate. I was comfortable loving the Facts or Life and even Ricky Schroeder. But loving myself? That seemed…

And Then There Was Me

I am a mother of teens: a driving teen, and a driving me crazy teen. Actually they are both great, and both completely teenagery without reservation.

I think back to my teenage years: what I knew, what I thought I knew, what I felt and what I believed. I was a teen, like most other teens: I was a beautiful mess.

Parenting a teen is weird. Parenting is just weird. It’s water-slides one minute, and…

Not Everyone “Gets” My Kid

I hate labeling my kid. I go out of my way NOT to do it. I want to just know KG, to be his mom, and help guide him through his childhood. And I go out of my way not use diagnosis as a crutch (for him or for me). I also try not to be defensive of him.

But for the sake of understanding, I will tell you that he has a different mindset, different behavior at times, and definitely different social…

5 Things I Wish They’d Told Me During Divorce

This month is the 11 year anniversary of my divorce, and when I think about over the last decade (plus one), I have this amazing perspective. But time as that effect.

I see the divorces happening in our community and  I have so much I want to say to the people in the middle of the storm. These are the boiled down, nutshell, must know things about getting a divorce. This is what you absolutely…

What I Have Learned from My Friends Fighting Cancer

I lost my grandmother to cancer. And I was just a teen. There is so much I would love to talk with her about if given the chance. And so much I just couldn’t understand at the time.

But now I am 41. And my friends are getting sick. A few have passed away. It seems like it was just yesterday when we were all kids.

I have been following the story and life of the Beasley family the last few years. I…

It’s been nearly a month since I have written.

Yes, I have been busy. The boys were finishing the school year, the dog sitting business is busy and my husband’s business is ever demanding. And to top it off, we did a major remodel in our home.

But there’s yet another problem. I have nothing to say. Well, nothing that isn’t already being said over and over again.

Does anyone say anything anymore…

Why You Should Stop Saying, “It’s the parents’ fault”

It’s that time of the year: award ceremony time. Kids across the country are being honored for their achievements in academics, athletics and character.

But not all kids.

And not mine. My kid doesn’t even get to go to field day.

I guess that makes me a bad parent, right?

It’s not a competition though right? All kids are different right?

But you know as well as I do, that is empty and meaningless…

2 Weeks till Mother’s Day! Gift Ideas for the Hubby Who is Fresh Out of Genius

Moms come up with the best gift ideas…for everyone else. They make holidays special, even ones you didn’t know existed. She has been celebrating you and your kids like it is her job. Now is your chance to make her feel special.

But what to get/do for her? You know your wife better than anyone, but let’s face it; you’re not a chick. And you just might feel fresh out of ideas.

Here is a list of…

Why I Quit Cursing – Confessions of a Foul Mouth (Christian) Mom

Everything is up for debate now. Processed versus organic. Breast versus bottle. Cloth versus disposable. Even swearing versus “child friendly talk” around our kids. There is someone who favors it. Someone who criticizes it. Tis the way of the world.

  I remember the first time I cursed around my oldest. I was pregnant with his little brother and I was nesting so hard. I had all of the baby…

Alert! Alert!

This parent has made a breakthrough.

And it’s too good not to share!

First of all, praise God for answered prayers that come in the form of small victories throughout our lives. Secondly, thank God for counseling which helps us set a healthy(ier) tone in our home.

Ok, so back to the breakthrough.

Your kids might never be difficult or argumentative. If they aren’t then praise you…

How Did I Get Here?

Today I shoveled up the body of a dead bird into the tines of a pitchfork and warily carried his body to the woods. And by warily I mean I looked the other direction while walking with his little body until I realized he had fallen off and I had to go back for him. Dead animals are cringe worthy.

  I never planned to do that.

  Well of course you didn’t plan that. How could you? –You might say.

Sorry If My Selfie Offended You

Selfies really irk people. They seem vain, self-serving, pathetic, and well…selfish.

  I used to hate selfies. I hated their captions. I hated their angles. I might have even hated their owners.

  Young people love selfies. They have selfies sticks and they aren’t ashamed to use them. Their image is their number one subject matter. When I was 20 you had to ask a stranger to take a picture of you…

Am I the Only Mother Who…

Am I the only mother who…

  Thinks of dropping off her kids 6 miles from the house––in a blizzard because they are fighting.

  Always knows the cost of a flight to Mexico. Just in case I need a little “me” time.

  Has all the good chocolate in the bathroom closet. Or the safe.

  Sees a call from the school during a workout and finishes the work out. They’ll always call back.

  Tells my child to…