Confessions of A Surly Old Forest Hag

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my hair (go figure I know) and I think I’m genuinely ready to shave it all off.

I reached the goal length for my hair, nipple length, and without any help from extensions at this point. I thought that maybe once I removed the extensions from my hair that I’d feel more comfortable with my hair, less tender-headed perhaps but I feel as though I don’t feel satisfaction even though I did reach a goal I had had in mind for years. It’s still a pain in the ass, especially physically, to maintain it and it’s starting to feel as though the juice ain’t worth the squeeze any longer, so to speak. It still tangles and snags and it’s hard to figure out how to sleep with it cause it ends up uncomfortable either way.

I want to just buzz it off and just be done with it. Or even upgrade to a rotary shaver (shoutout to Freebird flex series) and just be a cool bald person again. But I feel as well that people in my atmosphere would make such a problem out of it that it feels like I can’t do it even if I think it would be a net positive for me physically and mentally. I don’t know

I envy bald people for their freedom. I wish I could have that freedom in my life, to only have to mow it down to the scalp and that’s the end of it. But since I’m not *balding* it’s treated like a crime to even think about it. But like I want to commit the crime and be free

Or like, I wish it would just fall out like the classic man way then no one could complain, again I don’t know.

I find myself on the r/bald subreddit and just wanting to be those men so badly. They look happy and comfortable (and hot, sorry) and I want that for myself. It just seems so serene and liberating but I just don’t feel like I have the strength to not give a fuck what others think about me enough to just do it. But I keep hearing the voices telling me “it’s not you,” “you look like a sick person,” “you look like a skinhead,” etc. I understand why so much bald fetish content is designed around the act being done by someone else ( a dom usually) cause at least it someone does it to you you don’t have to fight about it as a matter of agency

It just sucks feeling like what I look like is for other people. My comfort takes a backseat to other people’s preferences and I don’t get to advocate for myself because I have ‘pretty hair’ especially as a man.

I don’t know what my breaking point is but I feel like every tug on the scalp or loose hairs combed out in the shower ( by the way wet hair is one of the worst feelings in existence to me) or dollar spent on hair care products or minute spent scooping it up and out of my face for work is pushing me closer and closer to it, even if I’m terrified of the consequences

And I know, if one has made themselves familiar with my blog or just my person in general, that I whine about wanting to shave my head a lot but lately it’s just felt different than a silly alternate fantasy to cope with the cons of growing one’s hair out successfully….