Hey there, friend.

given that this was a welding class, I was expecting this to end up so much worse

whAT BOOK IS THIS

To Be or Not to Be by Ryan North.  Hamlet as a choose-your-own-adventure book.

I own this book and it’s about 600 pages and it’s ALL this good. You can play as hamlet, Ophelia, or hamlet sr, who is a ghost. You can murder everyone in the play. You can fire yourself out of a cannon and use your uncle as a skateboard. There are dozens of endings and places where you can diverge from canon and do something wacky instead. 10/10 would recommend

The ways that exist to break this game that simultaneously do absolutely no damage to how this game functions are ASTONISHING.  

Did you weaponize the chickens?

You hurt cuccoo? You hurt cuccoo like the link? Oh! Oh! Death for molduga! Death for molduga for a hundred years!

@amenoyozakura the chickens again

important reminder that most people you follow online are significantly lamer than you think they are including me. and if you feel insecure comparing yourself to someone online: DON'T. theyre probably also lame and weird. most people on the internet are

reblog if you're also lame and weird.

what doesn't kill you makes you stay on tumblr for 13 years and counting

Why is this heat so hot 😩

It’s the heat

Source?

you are fifteen thousand generations removed from stone tools

to be clear you are fifteen thousand generations removed from the invention of stone tools. not from the end of stone tools. modern humans are still using stone tools.

I thought you meant we were descendents -of- stone tools

your father was a handaxe and your mother smelt of microliths

Self aggrandizing humor saves lives. I’m an authority on this since I’m legitimately the coolest girl in the world.