king mono

Jaune: Ruby is very small and quite adorable!

Ruby: Aww, thanks!

Jaune: Therefore she must be destroyed…

Ruby: …

Yang: I have a sudden and intense need to kill vomit boy right now!!!!

Mercury: *spits out blood*

Mercury: I don’t know where Ruby Rose is, and even if I did, I’m no snitch. I’ll never talk to you.

Jaune: Well. That’s a real shame then. And here I wanted to do this the easy way.

Jaune: *knocks twice on door*

Mercury: Who the fuck are you calling in now? Ruby’s other boyfriend she’s cucking you with?

Jaune: Worse.

Jaune: Her wife.

Weiss: *walks in twirling a knife between her fingers*

Weiss: Hi Mercury. I heard you stole Ruby from me.

Mercury: …I’m willing to talk.

Weiss: Oh Mercury, it is far FAR too late to talk.

Ruby: *Thinking it's going to be a sexy fantasy* Sure~.

Yang: Hey, Jaune, how did meeting my mother go?

Jaune: My pelvis hurts.

Yang: W-What…?

~~~

Ruby: So, Jaune did you meet my mom? Did she give you some of her famous cookies?

Jaune: I much preferred her milk than her cookies.

Ruby: H-Her milk? What are you talking about.

~~~

Blake: Hey, Jaune, how was seeing my mother, she didn’t tell any embarrassing stories about me did she?

Blake: Please tell me she didn’t…

Jaune: She needs to trim her nails; My back is covered in scratches.

Blake: Why is your back covered in scratches…?

~~~

Weiss: How was seeing my mother, Jaune; Hope she wasn’t too drunk.

Jaune: She compared your father to a shrimp, and me to a horse.

Weiss: What are you talking about?

~~~

Pyrrha: Hey, Jaune! So what do you think of my mother?

Jaune: She’s hoping for a boy, personally I’m hoping for a girl?

Pyrrha: Girl, boy? What are you talking about?

~~~

Some time, and a realizations later.

~~~

RWBYP: …

Blake: Jaune slept with our moms…

Yang: Yep…

Blake: Each, and every one of them…

Pyrrha: More than once I’d bet.

Blake: And, they all liked it…

Weiss: He’s better than my dad, that’s all I’m gonna say…

Blake: Jaune fucked our moms…

Ruby: Mom seemed to be glowing…

Blake: Our moms managed to sleep with, Jaune the first day they met him, and we haven’t been able to bed him ourselves in over a year! The fuck is this bullshit?!

Pyrrha: Maybe, Jaune likes milfs?

Weiss: It can’t be something as stupid as that!

~~~

Sun: You slept with all their moms?!

Neptune: Why would you do that?

Jaune: Simple; They’re milfs.

SN: …

Sun: Ah- Actually-

Sun: ... Hmm.

Neptune: ... Nah, you bring up a good point there. but RWBY are all chicks. Does the bro code apply to them?

Sage: Well ... that's a good question. I think we should put this action under review.

Jaune: Now Hold on-

Sun: Seconded, Sage. Let's hold an Assembly.

Jaune: But THey're MILFS!

Neptune: *Wearing a fake mustache* Okay Bub, just put you hands behind your back and know that everything you say can and will be held against you in court-

Jaune: Titties.

SSN: Nice.

Neptune: You're still under detainment until this is cleared up.

Cardin (jealous but trying to be professional): You will be hung.

The MILFS all in the back: But he's already hung!

It has been stipulated in the bro code section 2 paragraph 6, that

"Bro's girlfriends are off limits, exes and family members are only allowed when bro has clearly stated that he has no issue with it and gives his blessing."

However this never happened because

A) Raven left yang's dad when after she was born.

B) Ruby's mom presumably died and as the kingdom of vale marriage laws dictate after a period of time she is removed from the family.

C) Blake's has been astranged to her mother when she left her home and never contacted her after a long period of time.

D) Weiss was completely distant and separated to her mother even before she left for beacon.

E) Pyrrha's mom was Missing for 4 years and she was married in the kingdom vale so the marriage law has the same effects.

Mercury: Blake Belladonna still very much loves her mothers, and ran away for reasons unrelated to abuse or neglect by her parents. She never stopped believing them to be her parents.

Mercury: Ruby Rose has always loved her mother, despite her extended period of having been considered Killed in Action. This leaves Summer Rose as her mother, both by blood and emotional association.

Mercury: Pyrrha Nikos, with the information that her mother was missing and also declared legally dead, and having moved away still believed her to be her mother with the information she had on hand.

Flynt: Objection your honor! this is conjecture-

Cardin: Overruled, Mr. Black, please continue.

Mercury: *Ahem* With all this in mind, I would like to call the Defendant to the stand.

Jaune: *Walking into the booth, taking Robyn's hand* Yes?

Mercury: Mister Arc, Did you have sexual relations with these five previously mentioned women?

Jaune: Yes I did.

*Green*

Mercury: Were you or were you not Aware of any of these five woman's relations to your friends and teammate?

Jaune: I was unaware of the woman formerly known as Hestia Niko's relationship to Pyrrha Nikos.

*Green*

Mercury: So, for the remaining four Milfs you knew they were related to Ruby Rose, Weiss Schnee, Yang Xiao Long, and Blake Belladonna?

Jaune: Yes I did.

*Green*

Mercury: And did you attempt to contact Any of team RWBY before engaging in sexual congress with these four Women?

Jaune: ...

Mercury: Mister Arc?

Jaune: ... No.

*Green*

*Gasps from among the jury and those in the audience of the court proceedings*

Flynt: "Thank you your honor. Mr. Arc. What was the original intent upon meeting the four MILFs?"

Jaune: "Team RWBY wanted me to meet their mothers. Something about passing some sort of test... As for Pyrrha's mother I was going with her to pick up something for Pyrrha's birthday."

Flynt: "So am I correct to assume that the initial plan was not to have earth shattering sex with five MILFs?"

Jaune: "I mean yeah."

Flynt: "Mr Arc. how would you describe the five MILFs before meeting with them."

Jaune: "I'd say lonely."

Mercury: "Objection! Relevance."

Cardin: "Overruled. I'll allow it. Get to the point defense."

Flynt: "Yes your honor. I would like to produce exhibit A1, A2, A3 and A4" *Sets down four photos. One of Taiyang Xiao Long, one of Ghira Belladonna, one of Alexander Nikos and one of Jacques Schnee* "The deceased and one current husband of the MILFs in question."

Nora: *Munching on popcorn, managing to whisper somewhat quietly* So... is Fearless Leader winning or not?

Ren: *Supporting his brother from another mother from afar* By this point it could go either way.

Nora: How so? He knew he was gonna bang four of our friends' moms, even if Pyr-Pyr's case is a bit of weird one.

Ren: It's as Mr. Coal said, "No Bro's" were harmed and/or slighted by Jaune's action. That alone would normally be enough to acquit him from any and all charges.

Nora: Well, yeah... but this isn't "normally" though, no? Pyrrha and the rest aren't bro's. They're more like sisters from other misters by this point.

Ren: *Sighs* Indeed. And it's because of that distinction that this trial could actually lead to a conviction for our leader.

Nora: *Mouthful of more popcorn* How'zat?

Ren: Our near familial relationships with the others, who are all female, could actually fall under a certain- if rarely used- stipulation of the code.

Nora: I see... *Does not see*

Ren: *Nods in misplaced agreement with Nora* Mhmm. Page 13, Section 9, sub-section 5, paragraph 2 of the Bro Code, clearly states that a sufficiently progressed platonic relationship with a member who is not considered a "Bro" could still be regarded as such under a number of circumstances.

Nora: *Another mouthful of popcorn* Sush'az?

Ren: It takes under consideration the closeness of the non-Bro to the Bro on trail. This includes shared interests, similar hobbies and activities, how long the non-Bro and Bro have known one another, as well as certain degrees of sexual tension between them. Among others.

Nora: Does the sexual tension need to be higher or lower or something?

Ren: That varies on case-to-case basis. If the non-Bro and Bro are both male, then the homo-eroticism could weigh more heavily on his cases in either direction depending on the severity of the accusations, as well as the competency of the lawyers. A higher level of homo-eroticism could potentially be interpreted as a higher degree of betrayal according to the code.

Nora: *Fiddling with a few kernels in her hand* Okay, but Pyrrhy and the others are all chicks. Shower time with them would disspel any doubt about that.

Ren: Informative, and likely to be part of both the defense and the prosecution. Right now, both parties will have to establish what kind of relationship each of the daughters has with Jaune.

Nora: So more case-to-case basis stuff?

Ren: Correct. Right now, in the case of Pyrrha's mother it could be reasonably argued that a ruling of Not Guilty is a correct one, as well as a just one. It's the other mothers that will be the real challenge for either side to argue for or against Jaune's ultimate verdict.

Nora: Right, right. Ruby and the others all have different connections to our Jaune-Jaune.

Ren: Correct again. Ruby is something both of a little sister and a best friend to Jaune.

Nora: *Checking her now empty popcorn bowl* And Jaune is also Ruby's first friend. That must count for a lot, no?

Ren: Against Jaune potentially, yes. High value friendships weigh more heavily when considered for honorary Bro status in cases like these.

Nora: *Popping more popcorn in a machine* Okay, got it. Yang must be more clear cut then?

Ren: Yang is a fellow blonde to him, that alone makes them spiritually linked to a high degree. Not to mention that she also has bit of a Tomboy streak going on despite her clear feminine nature.

Nora: Bombastic boobs and major hair enthusiast to go with the fact she likes to fix and ride bikes and punch people in the face.

Ren: Yes, of the four she might actually be the most eligible for honorary Bro status.

Nora: *Filling another bowl from the machine* Okay... but considering all that, Weiss is a bit of weird case then, no? What with the whole hot/cold treatment?

Ren: Not a weird case at all, actually. Tsunderes are oft-referenced throughout the code, since their volatile nature need to be addressed as quickly as possible to lessen any potential fallout. It's now that Weiss' demeanour has thawed quite a lot that things actually get tricky for the defense, is my assessment.

Nora: *Munching once more* Whu'uboat Bwake?

Ren: It is likely that it will be argued that she's too far removed from Jaune emotionally speaking. So banging her mom could be considered to not be a violation of the code. Blake's currently estranged relationship with her mother might actually work in Jaune's favour here.

Nora: Sheesh, Blakey probably should've dropped the aloof cat shtick sooner then.

Ren: Probably, but that's for both the defense and the prosecution to argue.

Nora: *Quietly muching more popcorn as she thinks* ...

Ren: Care to share your thoughts?

Nora: What if Jaune was a Jeanne? You know, also a chick?

Ren: ...

Nora: Well?

Ren: I don't think that's actually covered. I think Jaune- or Jeanne, I guess- would be tried under the Sister Code instead. We Bro's would likely just think it's really, really, hot.

Nora: *Pops more popcorn* Fair, understandable and agreed. Jaune would make a really hot Jeanne. *Presents bowl to Ren* Want some? They're salted, not buttered.

Ren: *Grabs a handful* Why thank you, Nora. That's very thoughtful.

Nora: Wonder how Weiss's asshole dad and the others' dead dads are gonna factor into all this though.

Fox: So yes, while Blake may not be covered, and Weiss will need a deep investigation to truly understand, Yang, Ruby, and Pyrrha are all undeniably covered by the Bro Code.

Ironwood: "I see your idea for civic classes have bore fruit."

Qrow: "Now if only these classes existed when we were in school." *Mumbles under his breath* "Fuck you Tai and mini Tai."

Glynda: "At least they are being civil about it."

Ozpin: "I'm more surprised you are allowing this to go on Glynda. Its in the middle of the school week."

In one of the training room you can see a massive fight happen between the 5 women that found out Jaune has slept with their mothers fighting each other for the chance to face Jaune for reasons. A crowed from watching the fight and Emerald was playing bookie and taking bet form crowed.

Emerald: * Holding a notebook in hand as writes down people’s bets.* Ok I got 100 on xiao-long as the winner as well as 50 on Rose in the top three. Then we have the favorite to win Nikos with 30 to one to take it. *Look at the crowd of students who are cheering for there fighter to win.*

Random student 1: *Wavering some Lien* put 70 down on Schnee in the top 3!

Random student 2: *Wavering some Lien* put 150 that Schnee is the first to get eliminated and double if it’s done by Nikos!

Pyrrha: * Currently clashing with yang as she tries to eliminate weiss.* THAT ARC BOTTY WILL BE MINE!*She proclaimed with a crazy look in her eyes and a blush on her face*

The other girls where freaking out over the change that happen to Pyrrha.