I was delirious watching the finale late last night and it is only hitting me now how big a deal it was that Agnes begged Garth to marry Becka. Like obviously we know she has feelings for him, but now that her engagement has been broken off, you would expect her to want Garth not to go through with it so they have a chance to be matched in the future. Hell, she was begging Becka not to marry him even when she knew she herself was supposed to be married off to someone else, which logically made no sense and tbh was an awful thing to say because marrying Maddox or a colony commander would have been horrible for Becka. She was prioritizing her crush over the safety of her best friend.
But now, something has shifted. Idk if itâs because seeing Becka get taken by the Eyes made her realize how much she means to her, or if Becka destroying her life to protect her inspired her to do the same, or quite possibly both, but either way, she stepped the fuck up. Not just by throwing a wrench in her own marriage plans (to her, Weston would look like a good match even if she didnât want him) to save Becka, but by prioritizing her afterwards. Previously, she was choosing Garth over Becka, despite everything they had been through. This episode, she chose Becka over Garth.
That kiss was so satisfying because it felt earned. Not that Agnes âearnedâ the right to kiss Becka, but that she did the internal work necessary to get her to the point where she would. I think the combination of what Becka did for her and almost losing Becka made her realize how much she loves her, even if sheâs not sure what kind of love that is. She looks a little confused during and after the kiss, but also certain. She looks like she does want it, even if sheâs not sure what it means.
Ngl the show really outdid my expectations here. While Agnes was obviously very attached to Becka and afraid of losing her in episode 1, she was clearly unaware of having any feelings for her until recently, and I was afraid the show would go the tired route of the yearning gay best friend getting rebuffed and continuing to suffer with something totally unrequited. I had a hard time cheering for this ship early on because I truly did not expect them to go there, and so early on too! But damn, now I am truly invested. Agnes going from kissing Becka (her first kiss!), to having to watch her marry the boy sheâs been pining over only minutes later is absolutely wild, and it sets up a very interesting season 2 where the two people she has feelings for are in a loveless marriage to each other. The drama is juicy, and a queer awakening storyline in Gilead is terrifying but extremely interesting, especially with Agnes being one of the narrators. As a queer person who grew up in Evangelicalism, I canât wait to see where this all goes. I was already attached to the story for the catharsis even if I expected it to be only pain, but now that thereâs a chance it could go in a more happy direction, where maybe the whole thing is not entirely doomed? Sign me the fuck up.
(I am crossposting this btw, so if you see it elsewhere I am only plagiarizing myself).
