Gods of Death Love Apples

getting my monster gf drunk by shooting buzzballz into her with my ovipositor strap

It was a clitorical question

resurrected dead wife watching her own montage: wow I looked so hot in that

So is mickeys dick smasher the new terminology for an inverted bell curve

im only attracted to worthy opponents

i like the term "gallows humor" because it always makes me think of someone getting sentenced to death and being like "i have GOT to be the funniest person at my public execution"

fuck, marry, kill: the wound that won’t heal, the past you can’t undo, the ghost that keeps returning

Saw a comment saying character X can't be a pervert because he's ace. Bro. Bro. Bro. BRO. BRO. BRO. BR

I do suffer the american condition of liking to drink huge drinks

Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things

openin’ the door to the microwave one second early because you don’t need all the hootin’ and hollerin’

“does this character eat pussy” poll and it’s your full name first middle and last under an unflattering candid picture of you having a bad experience at the grocery store

thinking about “you haven’t met all the people who will love you” and like!!! you also haven’t found all the things that will make you happy!!!! there will always be new authors and musicians and artists whose work you will one day discover and love!!!! there will always be new hobbies and skills for you to learn and feel fulfilled by!!! there will always be new things around the corner that will bring sudden and unexpected happiness!!!!!!!!!!!

in space no one can hear you moan like a girl

Ground control here, we can hear you just fine

Look a this photograph