I'm Going To Give You The Choice I Never Had

I can’t make pasta any more without mumbling to myself, “wet the drys… then dry the wets…”

Every time I’ve seen Skweezy Jibbs he’s completing some obscure side quest and being based as hell about it

I'm, above all else, a tangentgirl. always saying shit like "sidenote," "oh also," "by the way,"

an old drunk man told me to enjoy my life and have fun because I’m only 24 and I have so many years and so much life ahead of me and then he went “and you know what? in ten years when you’re 34 you’ll still be young and have your whole life ahead of you” and it was really comforting to me

Hey, no homo, but I am sitting on the broken swing set out back in the perfect, quiet, 2:00am blackness and picturing the softness of your voice and the darkness of your eyes with such perfect and terrible clarity that it feels like I'm choking on my own heartbeat.

Now I'm eating croutons straight out of the bag.

Still no homo ?

I'm gonna level with you, friend: I am eating these croutons gay style.

favourite rpg trope is the merchants in incredibly hostile environments. we are at the evil curse mountain and youre just selling me items normal style

Essential worker during covid

Arrested again. As if it's my fault cop guns keep doing the chef boyardee can thing to me

Color theory is a real sumbitch