darling, don't be afraid.

headcanon: alistair can’t stand edward. there’s no way a man who values his privacy and solitude that extremely would have much tolerance for a telepath. he only met the kid once before, which ended with alistair saying his goodbyes to carlisle and zooming off the second edward responded to something he hadn’t said out loud. alistair tries to avoid him the entire time he’s in forks and glares at him whenever he’s near, in warning.

succession fans scare me they're always like "did you see when cousin greg filled that risk assessment sheet ugh i literally want to keep him in a pringles tube and shake him like a noise stick"

oh ok

It’s for the best

Imagine getting mauled by a wolf and none of your friends bother to check your pulse before putting you on a funeral pyre and lighting it up.

they set her on FIRE

we need more women in stem (scavenging in the canadian wilderness, threatening men with knives high on shrooms, eating human flesh, making thanks to the ancient gods of the sky and the dirt)

I feel like we don't talk enough about all the ways smeyer's mormonism affected the canon of twilight. I only recently realised the comparison she makes between vampires and jesus. the idea being that these supernatural beings that are so above humanity and are essentially gods in nature, remain faithful christians because if they can exist why can't God, but one thing i think a lot of people missed is that canonically it takes three days for humans to become vampires, three days of agonising pain. and that always seemed so arbitrary to me until i realised: it's the same amount of time jesus took to resurrect.

this was a christmas meme i wrote while drunk as fuck and yall are actually replying with thoughtout, intellectual texts idk whether to be proud or confused

i am LOVING the Twilight Renaissance 

wait I thought Stephanie Meyers made it canon that Edward can’t produce new sperm and the warm water of the ocean warmed up his sac enough for him to impregnate Bella. So in all Jacob should’ve been gay for Edward all along

The warm water of the ocean did what now