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Pussy so nasty make you go la la la

Sorry I was ghostwriting for Sabrina Carpenter

I have just combined all rice in the world into a single rouse

Sneebert Deebert

this year’s prom theme is… *opens envelope* Great Lakes Invasive Species And What Boaters Can Do To Stop Them

And the subject of tonight’s ecology panel is *turns on powerpoint* Enchantment Under the Sea

The woke mob has made Santa gay! Mrs Claus has been replaced with a 5'8 twink named Tony Tinsel

jerking off has been mid lately

listen i consider myself an empathic person but after a certain point i get sick of other people’s problems. my friend is always talking about how the jewel-eyed skull on their mantlepiece is tormenting them w its sinister beauty and im over it. like dude i don’t want to talk about this anymore. get rid of the fucking skull

you’ are biased against my skull

i’m not having this argument again man

skrillex's "bangarang" used to play

what now?

Silence unending, interurrpted occasionally by flo ridas "cant believe it"

one detail i think is important to point out: if you look at the video frame by frame, you will see that his pants come off

you're telling me this guy's a bouncer? huh... and what does he bounce on, if you don't mind me asking...?

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I never use Tumblr anymore but literally everyday that I login this has new interaction

Shout-out to aromantic people whose lives are so fucking busy that they periodically forget what day of the week it is. today is Wednesday, June 5th. Happy Aromantic Visibility Day.

Today is Thursday, June 5th. Happy Aromantic Visibility Day.

It's June 5th again!