happy pride month!! i am now casting my âDYKE CODYWAN MAKEOUT SESSIONâ spell at full power and beaming beautiful images of sapphic codywan kissing directly into your mind đŞâ¨

⣠Chile in a Photography âŁ
đŞź

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Stranger Things
i don't do bad sauce passes
we're not kids anymore.

romaâ
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Not today Justin
Jules of Nature
will byers stan first human second
Three Goblin Art

titsay
Peter Solarz
hello vonnie
Aqua Utopiaď˝ćľˇăŽĺşă§č¨ćśăç´Ąă

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@indecisivepirate
happy pride month!! i am now casting my âDYKE CODYWAN MAKEOUT SESSIONâ spell at full power and beaming beautiful images of sapphic codywan kissing directly into your mind đŞâ¨

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the complete and total defeat in the prosecutor's voice at the very end..... im đđđ
Havent seen a lot about this on tumblr so maybe not a lot of people know:
He was wrongfully raided by police in 2022
He used footage and names of the specific cops in posts, videos and songs making fun of them
The cops sued for defamation and cried in court about the songs ruining their lives
He won anyway
the music video in question
Thats the gentlest one. He made a whole parody song around the fact that one sheriff did a double take at a cake on his kitchen table:
And this is one of the ones that really hurt a grown man's feelings:
Court cases set precedents that similar cases may cite to basically win instantly, so let it be known the united states judicial system has concluded that if an officer of the law breaks into your house on false pretenses, you have a constitutional right to make youtube videos, using their personal photos, in which you claim to have cucked him đŤĄđşđ˛đşđ˛đşđ˛
His testimony is a masterclass in controlling the narrative and keeping the focus on the actual problem. Bravo.
when you say something awkward and stupid in a social situation that probably no one will remember except you for the rest of time
I was debating pre- and post- smartphone existentialism with an older gentleman today and he stopped part way through and said âWhy are you a security guard? Why arenât you teaching this at some college somewhere?â And I didnât know what to say so I went with âWell I used to make art but nobody pays an artistâ
I want to invoke thought and wonder and introspection and encourage the passions of every soul I meet forever and ever and dig until I find the glorious potential for creation and experience and joy in every single one but unfortunately I must pay rent and so I stand, a meat shield, an NPC with unlockable dialogue
#capitalism brain tells you that anyone interesting must fight to the top of their interest#and precludes the possibility of everyone everyone everyone already being interesting
similarly to how you should never trust gamers with a nonbinary character i feel like you can also never trust a fandom with an aroace character. whether it's explicitly canon or implied it just ends up the same
every time an allo person wants to ship an aroace spec coded character they should write an essay with MLA format citations on how this serves the themes of the story and is necessary for the character and how their ship is any different than the relationships said character already has and they should also send $500 dollars minimum to at least one aroace person in their fandom
"but people can do whatever they want!!!" i don't caaaaaare go examine your biases and cry about it or i'm blowing both of us up

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this is immensely funny to me
OKAY CAN SOMEBODY EXPLAIN TO ME HOW THE FUCK YOU SHIP A PACKAGE OF COOKIES TO A FRIEND WHO LIVES IN NEW JERSEY, ONLY TO HAVE IT NOT GET THERE ON TIME BECAUSE IT SOMEHOW ENDED UP IN GUAM?
I JUST
GUAM?
IM CRYING REAL TEARS MAH DUDES THE COOKIES ARE IN GUAM
KATIE TRIED TO SEND US COOKIES OUTTA THE GOODNESS OF HER HEART AND JUST
âOHHHH THESE COOKIES WERE SUPPOSED TO GO TO NEW JERSEY, PHIL? I THOUGHT YOU SAID
12/27, 8:37PM CT
ITS STILL IN FUCKING GUAM
12/28, 12:18PM CT
THE COOKIES ARE IN HONOLULU GUYS THEY ***FINALLY LEFT GUAM***
12/28, 10:22PM CT
THE COOKIES ARE FINALLY ON THEIR WAY TO NEW JERSEY
GO COOKIES GO
@phantomrose96 @cupcakecreeperâ @homebeccer GET READY
lol i was looking through my history to find the tracking number page and
12/30, 12:39AM CT
@phantomrose96 @homebeccer @cupcakecreeper
holy fuCK HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS
THE COOKIES ARE ALMOST THERE
The saga of Katieâs Guam cookies is my Anime of the Season
THEYâVE ARRIIIIIIIIIIVVEEDDDDD THEYâRE ON THE FRONT DOORSTEP
COOKIES ACQUIRED
THE THRILLING CONCLUSION
also as a bonus visual hereâs a rough approximation of these cookiesâ journey
how the FUCK did this blow up and get so many notes
SO FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES, @homebeccer @phantomrose96Â @cupcakecreeper AND I WANTED TO KNOW HOW MUCH IT WOULD ACTUALLY COST THE U.S. GOVERNMENT TO INTENTIONALLY SEND THESE COOKIES FROM TEXAS TO GUAM TO NEW JERSEY AND???????????????
ANDÂ
ITâS
ITâS
ITâS NOT AN OPTIONÂ ITâS NOT AN OPTION I CANâT I-
I COULDNâT EVEN HAVE SENT THESE COOKIES TO GUAM EVEN IF IâD HAVE TRIEDÂ
Cant believe we uncovered the Guam Cookie glitch folks
Its not even an in-game feature
Oh my god itâs back
H O W
Iâve had this sort of thing happen.
At least it explained why the package took so long to get here.
I appreciate that they have an Entire Stamp for âMissent to Nepalâ
No one said âhey letâs stop missending things to Nepalâ they just said âletâs make a stamp for thisâ and called it a day.
Iâm gonna get Missent to Guam tattooed on my arm in commemoration.Â
@hellsite-hall-of-fame
Get Moist von Lipwig in charge of the US postal service ASAP
Ok I know this is super old now but I work at a post office and I was curious about the price so I did some digging and I still donât have a definite answer because THE REASON it says âno shipping services availableâ is because all shipping services were actually suspended to Guam at the time. As in no packages, parcels, letters, or mail or any kind could be sent to Guam. So not only is it mind boggling that it got sent so far in the wrong direction of its intended destination, but because nothing should have been able to get in to Guam period.
You QUITE LITERALLY could not have sent these cookies to Guam if you tried.
wait I have one more story. there's a group of anti-abortion protesters who often set up by the Ethiopian cafe I hang out in, and when I was waiting to cross one of them held up an aborted fetus sign and said "how does this make you feel?" and I said "hungry", and then I was so satisfied by my own cleverness that I missed the lights and stepped off the sidewalk into oncoming traffic
im pregnant and its nobodys. it aint even mine
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To be quite honest with you all I do think that aro/ace-spectrum fans in fandoms where people are desperately inventing crossover ships and humanizing non-human characters in order to have a conventionally attractive guy to ship the main character with, instead of possibly having to enjoy a story with no romance in it, have the right to refer to everyone else as cowards.
Sorry you almost had to entertain the idea that people like me exist, I'm sure that was very painful for you.
don't make this harder, please
at a certain mass of reblogs your "please do this specific thing for trans women" post attracts people who are like "be nice to EVERYONE" and like. okay. first of all.
(id: tags reading "and once you past that the 'im gonna be nice to everyone except trans women because theyre hysterial bitches' crowd comes out")
When I was in middle school we would do these weekly things called "Flag Salutes" where the entire school came out to the quad to stand in big ranks and sing patriotic songs. I lived in one of the most conservative counties in America and the teachers took the Flag Salutes very seriously.
We hated them. We didn't really clock the nationalist nature of the thing but we we hated being asked to stand in a big group and sing songs for nobody. It was boring and goofy. Thinking about it now, it really was just our teachers using us as fodder for a Mass Ritual to Prevent 9/11 from Happening Again.
Eventually, some kids developed a sort of game. The ceremony had all these little dramatic pauses between sections of a speech or in-between songs. Kids would wait for those little pauses and, right before the song started, just shout "NINE ELEVEN!" There was a voice for it to. You had to sound kinda like a Patrick Star or a similar exaggerated dunderhead type character.
It made the teachers incredibly mad but nobody ever got in trouble. The trick was to drop the Nine Eleven the moment before the song started so they couldn't stop to focus on who was yelling. Once they start the ritual they couldn't stop it or the spell would backfire and the Taliban Would Get You or whatever.
I think that if you had enough daughters AND played your cards right you could spring Mambo Number Five out at the EXACT right gathering and shatter your entire family's trust forever
The secret is to name them out of order with the lyrics so by the time anyone catches on it's too late
For me personally the ideal gathering would be my funeral

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just because someone can articulate their point better doesnât make them right, it makes them articulated.Â
and you arenât stupid for having trouble articulating yourself.
Just felt like redrawing the mechanisms logo with a few more details.