XXIII

my bedsheet is pregnant and it's. the rest of my laundry

i think there should be two nighttimes. one for sleeping and a second one for being awake but at night. and then only one daytime because daytime doesn’t matter as much except for the birds

they should invent a disproportionate emotional response that goes away when you rationally understand the cause

do you think a cornered mouse would dream of cheese

come on man

Fuck one of the cis boys in my D&D group started playing a girl and he’s better voice trained than my tranny ass

you know what you must do

It’s been taken care of.

it is absolutely essential to have friends you can have extremely insane pervert conversations with. this is kind of what makes life worth living

u can either reach me on tumblr dot com or hand written letter

"Block this ad" isn't good enough, I need a feature that directly tells the company "this was so shit that it lowered my opinion of your product"

me when i fucking GET you

tbh it’s a red flag that the inventor of chiropractic got the idea from a ghost. bones are like the #1 thing ghosts don’t have

i respectfully request that we bring this meme back because i think it came before its time. we werent ready in 2013. i think were ready now