getting to that part in the day where I imagine how soothing it would be to rock back and forth in a dark room
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getting to that part in the day where I imagine how soothing it would be to rock back and forth in a dark room

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A platitude?
PERRY THE PLATITUDE!?
people telling chatgpt their problems is insane to me like girl just get a tumblrâŚ.
Everything is so rushed. People in their twenties complaining about being old, sped up songs, sped up videos, too many things to do in such a short time. We have lost the art of lingering.
love when fictional men are so devoted to their partner it makes them dangerous and insane. very slutty behavior keep it up king

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When I see a new jaehyun fic but itâs not the jaehyun I want đđđđ writers come backkkkk đŠđŠ
in 2026, remember how GOOD writing feels. remember how satsfying it is to get your characters to the point you have been dying to get to, where they will experience the love, fear, relief or whatever the feeling you want to bring to life may be. let this year be the year of writing, prgress and of satisfactory endings.
The Language of Touch
Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Summary: Azriel has never been loud about love. But you learn the truth in the spaces between: heâs made of hands âcareful, reverent, relentless. Hands that ask, not take. Hands that map you like prayer. And you learn his language until it sounds like home.
CW: brief implied intimacy (non-graphic)
A/N: so while i attempt to get myself to write here's this lil random fic that was sitting in my drafts while y'all wait, this is pure fluff and mega-soft sweet azzy, updates to the other fics r comingg i promise
⸝
He was a man made of quiet thingsâblades, breath, patienceâbut everyone who loved him knew the truth: Azriel was made of hands.
Not only the hands that held a knife steady enough to thread a needle in a storm, but the hands that found you in the dark like a map learned by heart. The hands that asked you to stay without ever once closing into a fist.
He touched you like a language. And youâstubborn, sharp, impossible youâkept learning the dialect until it sounded like home.
⸝
The first time he realized it, you were both too tired to pretend you werenât. Dawn pressed at the windows, soft as felt. You were at the kitchen table with a mug that had given up steaming, chin in your palm, eyes somewhere past the river. Az came in looking like heâd argued all night with a report and lost by a polite margin.
He didnât say good morning. He didnât have to. He stopped at your shoulder and slid his knuckles down the slope of your cheekbone, a hush of skin on skin, and your mouth softened around a smile he kept for himself.
âHi,â you said, small as a secret.
âHi,â he murmured back, and kissed the base of your fingers as if that were a promise he had to make before any other.
You laced your hand with his. He exhaled like youâd taken a weight off his lungs. That was the first lesson: if there was a way to touch you, Azriel would find it. A palm on your back, the curl of his fingers through your belt loops as you reached for something high, a thumb pressed to the hinge of your jaw like he could unknit the day with a patient circle.
He said your name when he did it, alwaysâlike he was reminding the world who it needed to be gentle with.
⸝
In the training ring, he was worse.
Youâd be hot-cheeked and stubborn, hair escaping whatever youâd tried to pin it with, stance a fraction off because tired lived in your knees that day. Heâd circle you slow, all margin and intention, and when he stepped in to adjust your hand on the hilt he did it like you were glass and he was choosing where the light should go through.
âLower,â he said, voice low enough to make your bones listen. His thumb pressed at the base of your fingers; you felt the calluses, the honesty of them. âThere.â
When you refused to yield an inch, when your jaw went iron and the old anger showed its teeth, he didnât match it. He never matched it. His hands stayed soft as instruction, even when his mouth didnât. You ended up panting and irritated and victorious by degreesâand when you dropped the blade at last, he took your wrist and kissed the hammering pulse there in apology for every hard thing the world asked of you.
âAz,â you said, warning curling the syllable into a grin.
âWhat?â He blinked, too innocent. âIâm grounding my partner.â
âBy kissing my wrists?â
âEffective,â he said, and you hated that he wasnât wrong.
⸝
At the market, he threaded his fingers through yours and let his shadows trail the rest. The crowd had a way of swallowing edges; Azriel had a way of finding them again and leading you through with his hand warm and sure in yours. He could be impossible about it, possessive in the gentlest way, tugging you closer when the press grew too much, palm sliding to your waist like you were the only quiet in a noisy square.
âDo you need out?â he asked once, mouth near your ear, his breath a breeze that smelled like spice and something darker.
âNo,â you said, even though you did. He didnât argue. He just tucked you in against him, put his hand between your shoulder blades, and let the world move around you like water around a stone.
âTell me if you change your mind,â he said.
âI will.â
âI know,â he answered, as if that knowing were the point.
⸝
After hard missions, he didnât ask permission so much as offer it like a towel. âPlease,â heâd say quietly, eyes already on your hands to check if they shook. âLet me.â
He took your gear with careful fingers. He unfastened buckles like he was undoing knots in a childâs hair. In the bath he gathered your hair away from your face and washed the wind and ash out of it, palms sure, not lingering anywhere that wasnât welcome. If you leaned into him he made that soft sound in his throat like a man allowed to survive. If you flinched, he adjusted by inches until the water remembered how to be warm and you remembered how to let yourself lean.
âGentle,â you breathed, and he nodded as if youâd told him a truth instead of a request.
âAlways.â
Even when he was angry, even when fear made his voice go thin as wire, his hands stayed like thisâquiet, reverent, repeating the promise because it helped both of you believe it.
⸝
You discovered, by accident, that Azriel made the smallest, most ruinous sounds when you put your hands on him with the same care he used on you.
It started with a storm. The shutters rattled, the Sidra threw her voice against the bank, and you found him in the library all coiled restraint and terrible patience at a table of maps. You didnât speak. You stepped behind his chair and slid your palms over his shouldersâslow, steady, unhurriedâand felt him exhale like a landing.
He tilted his head back, eyes closed, and made a breath, a rough noise that you wanted to gather and keep.
âAgain,â he said, already wrecked.
You kneaded into muscle with the same focus you used on a knotty problem, thumbs pressing a line below his shoulder blades where his wings anchored. He shivered. The sound that fell out of him was quiet and honest and helpless in a way youâd never heard in a battlefield.
âAz,â you murmured, half laughter, half awe. âYou make the softest sounds.â
âDo not,â he said, scandalized, âuse that tone on my noises.â
You raked your nails lightly down, a catâs affection. He made another one. You smiled into his neck. âOh, Iâm going to be unbearable.â
âY/n,â he warned, except it wasnât a warning. It was your name, offered up with his throat bared.
⸝
There were nights he came home with the kind of gravity in his shoulders that made you afraid to touch him at all. Thatâs when you learned how to offer your hands instead of your solutions.
Heâd stand in the doorway of your room like a penitent. Youâd open your arms like a church does, without question, and heâd come to you with every apology he couldnât say yet written into the way his palms found your waist, your ribs, the back of your neck. You held his face the way you wished someone had taught him to hold his own.
âYouâre here,â you said, as if it were the easiest truth in the world.
âIâm here,â he echoed, relief making him almost lightheaded. âCan Iââ
âYes,â you said, before he could finish. âWhatever it is, yes.â
He always asked. Please let me touch you like this. Even in the urgency that followedâbreath hitched, clothes in the way, the two of you moving together with that old, inevitable drawâhis hands never forgot how to be kind. If heat ran high, his palms stayed careful. If you had him on the edge of sense, his thumbs still traced soothing circles on your hipbones, guiding you both into joy, into relief, into the soft, brave work of getting free by being held.
And when you reached back for himâwhen you mapped him with the same reverence, learning every line of his shoulders, the warm flex of his stomach, the fall of his throatâAz lost his composure like a man grateful to be allowed to put it down.
He made quiet, helpless noises into your mouth. His breath broke when your hand spread over his ribs. His whole body answered when your palm slid between his shoulder blades and pressed him closer like you were reminding him he got to choose closeness, too.
He went feral for softness. Yours undid him most.
⸝
Once, after an argument that should have gone worse than it did, you stood in the hall, both furious and half-smiling at the stubbornness of the other. Pride was a wall you could both scale for sport, but neither of you wanted to live on the far side of it.
He looked wrecked in the low lamplightâexplain-it-to-me eyes, jaw tight, careful because anger had always ended badly in the rooms of his life. He didnât reach for you. He held his hands like youâd taught him: visible, steady, waiting.
âIâm still mad,â you said.
âI know.â
âAnd I still want you to touch me.â
He went very still. âY/n.â
âDo youââ you tried again, steadier, âdo you want to?â
He didnât move for a beat; you saw the bite of restraint in his shoulders, the way he feared taking more than he was offered. And then you saw him choose trust. He stepped in and put his palm to your cheek, thumb sweeping that careful arc youâd grown addicted to, and the anger in both of you folded into something you could hold without being cut.
âThank you,â he said, and meant it like a prayer. âFor telling me how to love you.â
âDonât thank me,â you said, mouth softening against his wrist. âJust keep doing it.â
âGladly.â
⸝
He would reach for your hand in the most inconvenient places: mid-briefing, walking through the artistsâ quarter, on a roof made of old slate while the city breathed underneath. He kept your fingers interlaced as if you were a tether he refused to misplace. Sometimes you tangled both hands and he leaned his forehead to yours in the open air like scandal lived elsewhere.
âAddicted?â you teased once, and he didnât even pretend otherwise.
âCompletely,â he said, like the word tasted good on his tongue.
⸝
On the rare mornings you woke earlier than him, you took inventory with your hands. The scar that cut the brow youâd kissed a hundred times. The soft place under his jaw that made his breathing change. The ridiculous, lovely mouth that had learned to smile first when he looked at you. He pretended to sleep and failed to hide the small exhale you never stopped falling in love with.
âYouâre bad at pretending,â you whispered.
âI am trying,â he murmured, eyes still closed, smiling into the pillow.
You slid your palm down the long, warm line of his back. He made a sound so sweet your ribs ached.
âYou like my hands,â you said, smug and dangerously fond.
âWorship,â he corrected, opening his eyes at last. He caught your wrist and pressed his mouth to your pulse with the single-minded focus that had made you survive a dozen kinds of nights. âPlease keep touching me.â
âBossy.â
âBegging,â he countered, and did not stop kissing your wrist until you laughed and gave him your other hand too.
⸝
It wasnât always heat. Sometimes it was the plain, holy work of being two people in a life that didnât apologize for being hard. The way he reached for you at the end of a crowded dinner, pinky hooking yours under the table as if he could pull you toward the quiet you both wanted. The way you tucked your hand into his sleeve on cold walks so your fingers would stay warm against his skin. The way he counted your breaths with the pads of his fingers splayed over your ribs when nightmares came hunting and left with nothing because your name, said in his wrecked, reverent voice, was a blade they didnât recognize.
He loved you with his hands. He learned you with them, tooâthe little shiver you couldnât hide when he traced the knob of your spine under your shirt, the way your breath hitched when his palm cupped the back of your neck and urged your mouth up to his. He kept a private litany of your soft sounds and the places he could earn them. It wasnât conquest; it was devotion.
And when you gave that devotion backâwhen your fingers followed the arch of his wing where it met muscle, when you pressed careful kisses into the battered line of a scar he used to avoid showingâAz made those quiet, beautiful noises heâd never made for anyone else and looked at you like you were the answer heâd been afraid to write down.
âAgain,â he would say, blinking hard like a man surfacing into light. âPlease.â
âAlways.â
He believed you. He touched you like he did.
⸝
People called him a thousand names. Shadowsinger. Spymaster. Knife. Ghost.
In your mouth, he was simpler: âAz.â
And he looked, every time. The hands that had held a hundred kinds of danger softened like they were relearning how to hold a miracle. Even when he was angry. Even when you were. Even when the world deserved to be taken by the throat.
He never took you by anything but the hand.
What you learned, between storms and markets and rooms that needed doors locked, was this: the fiercest thing he did was be gentle with you. Even when desire ran high, even when the bed asked for a little ruinâhis palms stayed soft, his fingers coaxed instead of commandeered, his touch sang here, here, youâre safe, youâre wanted, stay with me. And when you turned that gentleness on him, when you ran your hands slow and sure over the body that had won a war and lost one and kept living anywayâhe came apart like a man finally allowed to.
He made the softest sounds into your mouth. He whispered please without shame and thank you without pride and your name with a devotion that made you ache.
Addicted to touching you? Of course he was. Heâd learned long ago that some salvations arrive in quiet, open hands.
He took them. He kept them. He kept you.
And every time he found your fingers in the dark and laced them with his, you felt the vow he didnât have to speak, resting warm as a pulse across your knuckles:
Always, always, like this.
⸝
acotar taglist: @xadenswhore
deliverance

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Iskender & Cicek (ep. 27 of âAlev Alevâ)
sweet relief
summary: You are the kindhearted third grade teacher who brings baked goods to the local fire station every Saturday. Bucky, the retired vet only eats the things he makes. Until one day he eats one of your pastries. word count: 19.0k+ pairing: firefighter!bucky barnes x fem!reader notes: thank you to that big, beefy firefighter i saw at walmart with my mom that inspired this fic. you will not be forgottenđŤĄalso, GO LISTEN TO MADISON BEER OR I WILL HEX YOU!!! edit: this fic has been done since i think november, and it's finally being released from it's cages! enjoy :) warnings/tags: no use of y/n, firefighter!bucky, teacher!reader, teacher!wanda, firefighter steve, sam, natasha, and joaquĂn, fluff, slow burn - once again, I LIVE AND DIE SLOW BURN. IF I DON'T THEN AM I REALLY ME??, reader bakes, grumpy!bucky, grumpy x sunshine, touch starved!bucky, bucky is soft only for you
The fire station always smells faintly of coffee, soap, and smoke. Not the harsh, burnt kind that clings to memories, but the faint ghost of long days and habitâpeople who spend their lives surrounded by heat, yet somehow still manage to make the place feel cold. Youâve been bringing desserts here every Saturday for almost six months now, and every single time, itâs the same: JoaquĂn greets you like sunshine just walked through the door, Natasha waves from wherever sheâs buried in paperwork, and then thereâs Buckyâsitting at the far corner table, stainless steel mug in hand, watching the world with that low, unamused scowl that never quite reaches his eyes.
You set the covered tray down on the counter, the tin still warm through the towel you wrapped it in, and start unpacking the brownies you stayed up too late baking. Youâd told yourself you werenât doing it for him, but youâd still checked three times that they werenât too sweet. He never eats anything you bring, not once, but you keep hoping. Not because you need him to like your dessertsâbut because every week you see the smallest shift in his shoulders when you arrive, like the world gets a fraction lighter for him, even if heâd never admit it.
Samâs the first one over, of course. âIf these are anything like last weekâs lemon bars, Iâm declaring you honorary station chef,â he says, already stealing one. You laugh, shaking your head, sliding the foil aside. The sound makes Bucky glance up from his coffee. Just a glanceâbarely half a secondâbut it catches you. His gaze is steady, unreadable, the color of blue steel and morning smoke. You smile at him out of habit, soft and polite. He looks away like he didnât see you at all.
You tell yourself you imagined itâthe way his jaw moved like he was fighting back a smile. Maybe you want to imagine it. Maybe thatâs why you keep coming back, tray after tray.
The station is quieter today, a rare lazy Saturday afternoon. Someoneâs got the radio humming low, a classic rock station playing something worn and comfortable. You pour coffee for whoeverâs around and settle by the counter, chatting with Sam about the upcoming charity event for the school. The talk is light, easyâexactly the kind of thing you love about this place. Then you catch Buckyâs reflection in the glass cabinet door across the room; heâs watching the tray.
Itâs subtle, barely there, but his eyes linger. Not on youâon the food. You hold your breath, pretending not to notice, but Sam does notice. You can tell because he suddenly stops talking mid-sentence, and his grin grows almost mischievous. âHey, Buck,â he says casually, âyou sure you donât want to try one? These got your name written all over them.â
âDonât trust other peopleâs cooking,â comes the same gruff answer, quiet but final. You donât miss the faint flush at the top of his ears though, and itâs enough to make something warm unfurl in your chest.
âSuit yourself,â Sam shrugs, but when he turns back to you, his eyes sparkle. You both know that was progress.
After a while, you find yourself leaning against the counter beside the coffee pot. Buckyâs still there, half in shadow, flipping through a newspaper that hasnât been printed in years. You donât try to talk to himâyouâve learned not to force conversation. Instead, you slide one brownie from the tray and wrap it in a napkin, setting it on the table near him without a word. Itâs not an offering, not really, just a quiet, small gesture.
Youâre halfway through cleaning up when you hear the softest soundâa fork scraping across foil. You look up without meaning to. Buckyâs still reading, still silent, but the brownieâs gone from the napkin. His shoulders are looser now, the tiniest bit of tension drained from his posture, and you swear, just for a second, his lips twitch like the start of a smile.
You donât say anything. You just pack up the empty containers and hum under your breath, the tune quiet and content. The song fades into the murmur of the radio, into the hum of the refrigerator, into the rhythm of a place that, for all its noise and steel, suddenly feels a little softer around the edges.
When you finally head toward the door, Sam calls after you. âSee you next week, sunshine!â You grin and wave. You expect Bucky to ignore youâhe usually does, but as you step outside, his voice follows, low and gruff.
âThanks for the⌠whatever that was.â
You turn, surprise flickering through you. âBrownies,â you say, smiling. âAnd youâre welcome.â
He nods once, barely meeting your eyes, and then goes back to pretending he didnât say anything at all. But you see itâthe faintest smudge of chocolate on the corner of his thumb.
And maybe, just maybe, next Saturday, youâll make something just for him.
By the next Saturday, youâve talked yourself out of caring. You told yourself you wouldnât overthink itâthat the brownie probably just looked good, that he mightâve been hungry, that it didnât mean anything. But when you catch yourself checking the oven timer more times than necessary while your new batch of blondies bakes, you already know youâre lying to yourself.
You tell yourself youâre doing it for everyone. For Sam, whoâll inhale anything with sugar; for JoaquĂn, who always pretends to ration his desserts but ends up sneaking seconds; and for Natasha, whoâs too polite to take one until you practically shove the container toward her. Youâre doing it because you like baking, because the kids at school drive you to the edge by Friday, and this has become your calm. But somewhere in the middle of folding in the white chocolate chips, you add a pinch more brown sugar, just in case someone else decides to try one again.
The air outside carries that quiet, late-autumn chill that makes the world feel still. When you step into the station, the warmth hits instantlyâcoffee brewing, the faint scent of detergent and pine cleaner. You hear laughter before you even see anyone. Samâs voice, low and teasing, followed by Steveâs steady calm trying to reel him in.
âMorning, teacher,â Sam greets as soon as he spots you, grinning like always. âYouâre about to save our Saturday again, I hope.â
You hold up the container. âBlondies. And I brought apple muffins too, for breakfast since you people apparently eat nothing but caffeine.â
Natasha snorts from the couch. âThatâs an exaggeration. Sometimes we eat protein bars.â
You laugh, and the sound fills the kitchen easily. You catch a glimpse of Bucky at the back table, leaning against the counter with a coffee mug that looks practically welded to his hand. He doesnât speak, but you feel his attention like static in the airâmuted, cautious, curious. You smile at him and keep moving, setting out plates, napkins, and paper cups. He watches every motion, pretending he isnât.
Steve ambles closer, taking a muffin and murmuring his thanks, and then, as heâs biting into it, says casually, âBucky told me your brownies were good.â
You nearly drop the lid. âHe what?â
Steveâs eyes crinkle in quiet amusement. âHe didnât say it exactly like that, but Iâve known the man long enough to translate. You made an impression.â
You glance over again, Buckyâs pretending to read something on his phone, and thereâs no chance he canât hear you, but the faint color on his ears tells you he absolutely can. You bite back a smile, warmth blooming under your ribs.
Itâs a calm day again, paperwork and banter, the radio humming. JoaquĂnâs sitting at the kitchen table fiddling with some gadget; Natashaâs nursing a mug of coffee while half-listening to Samâs story about a neighborhood dog that keeps chasing their truck down the street. You take the seat beside her, listening, laughing, and slowly you notice the smallest thingâBucky doesnât leave. The last few weeks, heâd always disappear to the garage or the supply room when the noise started. But today, he lingers.
He doesnât say much, just throws Sam a deadpan look when the man starts exaggerating, or mutters a dry comment that makes Steve choke on his drink. And somehow, those tiny, reluctant pieces of his personality make you grin more than you mean to.
Eventually, when the laughter quiets and the others drift toward chores or calls, you find yourself cleaning up the kitchen. You hum a little tune under your breath as you stack plates and rinse cups. The sound feels at home here now, tucked under the low buzz of fluorescent light.
Behind you, thereâs a shuffle of movement. âYou donât have to clean all that,â Bucky says, voice low but clear enough to make you turn. Heâs standing a few feet away, drying his hands on a towel, expression unreadable but not cold.
You smile, shaking your head. âI donât mind. I made the mess.â
He hesitates, then steps closer. âYou make a mess every week.â
The words might sound gruff, but his tone isnât sharp. Itâs teasing in the smallest, clumsiest way, like heâs trying it on for size. You laugh quietly. âYou keep inviting me back.â
âThatâs Sam.â
âI donât remember him being the one who ate a brownie last week.â
That earns you a lookâone brow slightly raised, the hint of embarrassment tightening his jaw. He doesnât deny it. He just exhales through his nose and mutters, âyou caught that, huh?â
You shrug lightly, rinsing another cup. âIt was hard to miss.â
Thereâs a beat of silence. You can hear the creak of the building settling, the hum of the fridge, the soft tap of his mug setting down beside the sink. And then, unexpectedly, he starts helping. Drying dishes beside you, movements neat, efficient. You glance up, and for a moment, the light hits his face just rightâsoft edges, tired eyes that look less guarded, mouth relaxed. âYou bake every week?â he asks.
You nod, setting another cup in the rack. âUsually. Itâs how I unwind after teaching. My kids are⌠a lot. Itâs nice to do something that doesnât talk back.â
He huffs out a short laughâbarely a sound, but genuine. âCanât argue with that.â
The air between you shifts. Not heavy, not awkward, just quiet and comfortable. When you reach for the towel heâs holding, your fingers brush his. Itâs nothingâjust the lightest contactâbut his hand goes completely still. You feel it immediately, the static between skin and skin. He doesnât pull back right away, his eyes flick up to yours, and for half a heartbeat, neither of you move.
Then you take the towel, pretending not to notice the way his shoulders straighten again. âThanks,â you say softly.
He nods once. âSure.â
When you finish, he walks you to the door. Itâs unnecessary, but he does it anyway, holding the door open with a quiet sort of courtesy that feels almost shy. You turn back before stepping out, smiling at him again. âSee you next Saturday?â
He leans against the frame, eyes flicking to your container. âYou bring those blondies again, maybe.â Itâs the closest thing to a smile youâve seen on him yet.
And as you step out into the crisp afternoon air, the thought sticks with you the whole walk homeâthat maybe this time, youâre not the only one waiting for Saturday.
The third Saturday starts gray and cool, the kind of morning that feels like itâs been steeped in fog. You pull your sweater tighter around your arms as you balance two containers in your handsâone with your usual dessert, the other with something new. Youâd made cinnamon rolls this time, because Sam had mentioned missing his momâs recipe, and because youâd caught yourself wondering if Bucky liked cinnamon. Youâre not sure why that thought stuck with you all week, but it did.
When you walk into the station, the smell of coffee is already there to greet you, warm and grounding. The radio hums somewhere in the background, and you can hear Samâs voice echoing down the hallâloud, teasing, familiar. You smile before you even see them. âMorning, sunshine!â Sam calls, appearing around the corner. âTell me you brought somethinâ good.â
âAlways do,â you say, lifting the containers. âCinnamon rolls and some kind of experiment involving brown butter and chocolate chips. No guarantees.â
âBrown butterâs never a mistake,â Natasha says from the couch, flipping a page of her magazine. She glances up, offers one of her rare, knowing smiles. âGood morning.â
âMorning,â you echo, setting the boxes down on the counter.
Steveâs at the stove making another pot of coffeeâhe always makes the second one too strongâand JoaquĂn is balancing on a chair trying to fix the overhead light again. Buckyâs there too, sitting at the table near the back, sleeves rolled up, forearms braced against the wood as he scrolls through his phone. He looks up once when you arrive, just once, then goes right back to whatever he was doing.
You pretend not to notice, but you do.
You start plating the cinnamon rolls, their warm scent filling the kitchen. Sam is the first to steal one, no surprise there. JoaquĂn jumps down from the chair, swiping his own before Sam can hog them all, and Steve gives you that gentle, polite âthank youâ that always makes you feel like you brought something meaningful instead of just sugar and flour. Natasha takes one, tooâeventuallyâand hums quietly after the first bite, which feels like a glowing five-star review coming from her.
Bucky doesnât move. He never does, not right away. But heâs watching.
You can feel it in the way his gaze lingers just past you, pretending to be indifferent but landing too often on the tray. You could call him out on it, tease him the way Sam would, but you donât. Instead, you just slide one of the rolls onto a small plate and set it at the corner of the table near him, like always. He glances at it, then at you. âWhatâs the trick this time?â he asks, voice low, almost cautious.
âBrown butter in the icing,â you say, smiling a little. âAnd extra cinnamon.â
He studies the plate for a moment, then his fingers curl around the fork. He doesnât say anything, doesnât make a show of itâjust cuts off a piece and takes a bite. The world doesnât stop, the room doesnât go silent, but you swear you feel it. Like something subtle and quiet shifting.
He chews slowly, expression unreadable, and thenâbarely, almost imperceptiblyâhis mouth twitches.
You keep your smile to yourself, pretending to busy your hands with cleaning up a bit of icing from the counter. Natasha sees it though, the faint curve of your lips, and you catch her smirk from across the room.
âGood?â you ask, when you canât take the silence anymore.
Buckyâs gaze flicks up to yours. âNot bad.â Itâs the gruffest possible compliment, but it makes your heart skip anyway. He finishes the rest without another word, and when heâs done, he stands, rinses his plate, and sets it neatly in the drying rack. Youâre pretty sure thatâs the closest thing to a thank you youâre ever going to get, but then he hesitates by the door, mug in hand. âYou teach third grade, right?â he asks suddenly, eyes still on the floor.
You blink, caught off guard. âYeah. I do.â
He nods once, still not looking at you. âThatâs⌠brave.â
You laugh, startled. âBrave?â
He looks up then, just a little, the corner of his mouth lifting. âI couldnât handle that many eight-year-olds. One of âem would start talkinâ back, and Iâd lose my job before lunch.â
âOccupational hazard,â you say, grinning. âYou get used to it.â
âI donât think I would.â
Thereâs a hint of amusement in his voice now, something warmer threading through the usual gravel. He takes a sip of his coffee, leans against the counter, and you realize this is the first time youâve actually seen him stay in a conversation. Not just endure it, stay.
The others drift in and out of the kitchen as the day stretches lazily on. JoaquĂn heads out to run errands, Natasha disappears into the office, and Steve starts sorting some equipment by the back door. Samâs napping on the couch, his snores filling the otherwise calm space. And still, Buckyâs there.
You find yourself sitting across from him with your own mug of coffee, talking about small, ordinary things. The town fair thatâs coming up. The schoolâs bake sale. His very strong opinions about the superiority of homemade coffee over anything from a cafĂŠ. Itâs not deep conversationâitâs easy, simple. But for Bucky, itâs a start.
You watch the way he relaxes as he talks, his voice softening, hands moving just slightly when he describes something. He still avoids too much eye contact, still glances down often, but his walls are lower today. You can feel it.
Eventually, Steve calls something from across the room about checking a delivery in the garage, and Bucky pushes his chair back with a low grunt. You gather your empty mug, standing too. When he reaches to take it from you, your fingers brush for a second, not even a full secondâbut long enough.
His touch is rough, calloused, but careful. You notice the way his hand pauses, the faint inhale that catches in his chest. Itâs nothing, really, just contact, but itâs the first real one, and you both feel it. He clears his throat softly, taking the mug from you like itâs fragile. âGot it.â
You murmur thanks and smileâgentle, easy. âSee you next week?â
âYeah,â he says, almost before he can stop himself. Then, quieter, âbring those rolls again.â
You walk out of the station with that small sentence echoing in your head. It shouldnât feel like anything. But it does. It feels like the first crack in the armor. And when you glance back through the door before leaving, you catch him watching you go, a faint, unguarded look in his eyes that tells you exactly what you hopedâit wasnât just about the food anymore.
You wake early the next Saturday with a kind of energy you pretend is just normal weekend motivation, but you know better. You replay that momentâbring those rolls againâmore times than youâd ever admit. You tell yourself not to romanticize it, not to interpret it like something bigger, but your hands are already moving before youâre even fully awake, kneading dough, rolling butter and cinnamon into spirals, letting the house fill with that warm, sweet smell that feels like comfort itself.
These rolls arenât for the whole station this time. Theyâre for him.
You still make a second dessert, because you donât want anyone calling him out, not yet. Sam would tease him into hiding, and Natasha would smirk and Bucky would retreat behind a wall so fast youâd never climb over it again. So you make blondies for the groupâeasy, reliable, a crowd favorite, and definitely not something Bucky also likedâand you pack the cinnamon rolls in a smaller container, frosting separate so they wonât get soggy. Bucky deserves them really good, better than the first time. You donât want to mess up the first thing he actually asked you for.
When you walk into the station, a wave of warmth and familiar noise greets you immediately. The TV is on, Sam and JoaquĂn are arguing about who should get credit for winning last weekâs pool game, and Natasha is leaning back in her chair looking like she has already judged both of them twice before breakfast. Steveâs by the coffee machine again, heâs always by the coffee machine.
They all greet you, except Bucky. Heâs thereâbut he doesnât look up right away. Heâs sitting at the table cleaning his gloves, movements precise, meticulous. You set the blondies on the main counter first, letting Sam pounce like he always does. Natasha takes one too, slow and deliberate. You laugh with them, talk lightly, and the dynamic is familiar and effortless.
But thereâs a second moment happening under that. You move to Buckyâs table. He finally looks up when you stop in front of him, eyebrows lifting just slightlyânot irritated, not cautious, but expectant.
You set the smaller container down in front of him. You donât open it, you just slide it across the table gently, giving him space to choose. He glances at the way itâs packagedâdifferent container than the blondiesâlike he knows immediately.
âThese are the rolls,â you say softly.
He holds your gaze for a slow, solid second, then he closes his cleaning kit, pushes it aside, and pulls the container toward him. He opens it with careful fingers, like he wants to savor this. You hand him the small jar of frosting without even thinking and he takes that too, almost gently. âYou made extra icing,â he says, tone unreadable.
âYou asked for them again,â you answer, smiling. âFelt right to get it perfect.â
He doesnât comment on that. But he coats the top of one roll and takes a bite, in front of everyone this time. No hiding, no pretending. The room keeps going around you, Sam still talking, JoaquĂn still pretending heâs above stealing another blondie, Natasha sipping her coffeeâbut it feels like time pauses around that single bite.
Bucky closes his eyes just barely for half a heartbeat. Then he exhales like that first taste knocked some weight off his ribs. âThis isâŚâ he starts, then stops. You wait, heart thudding quietly against your ribs. He tries again, voice lower. âItâs really good.â
You donât tease him. You donât downplay it. âThank you,â you say. âIâm glad you like them.â
He eats another bite before speaking again. âYou didnât have to make these just for me.â
Thereâs no accusation in it. Just quiet, vulnerable acknowledgement. You soften a little, leaning a hand on the back of the chair across from him. âYou asked me to. That was enough.â
His throat works like he wants to say something elseâlike he wants to say a dozen thingsâbut instead he just nods. Then he gestures at the seat beside him with the smallest tilt of his head, like an invitation. You sit next to him easily, not making a big deal of it, and he doesnât move away. His knee stays close to yours, his arm resting comfortably where it is instead of shifting away to protect some kind of invisible line.
The others absolutely notice. Steve glances once over the rim of his mug, faint amusement playing at the edge of his mouth. Sam looks confused for a second, then like heâs silently screaming in victory. JoaquĂn smirks, nudging Natasha, who simply lifts an eyebrow like she called this three Saturdays ago.
But they donât say anything out loud, they let him have this moment.
You and Bucky sit there together, legs nearly touching, sharing quiet conversation while he eats something you made, openly, without hesitation, like a small ritual that belongs only to the two of you.
It starts with the smallest things. It isnât cinematic. It isnât some dramatic shift. Itâs quiet. Itâs domestic. Itâs the kind of change that sneaks up on both of you without either realizing it until itâs already inside the ribcage, forcing breath to come different.
You start noticing it because he sits closer now, not directly next to you every time, but close enough that you feel the warmth of him. When you speak, he leans in slightly like the world between you is somehow always shorter than it appears. His attention isnât lazy anymoreâitâs tuned in, like heâs cataloguing you the way he does storms and weather patterns he trusts from decades of instinct. He doesnât look away when you talk now. He actually listens.
And for Bucky, the noticing becomes almost unbearable in a way thatâs brand new.
The first time it happens, you donât even think about it. You were reaching behind him for the sugar jar in the station kitchenette because it somehow always ends up behind his mug, and your fingers brush briefly over his forearm. Just a soft, passing graze of your fingertips to warm skin through fabric. Nothing intentional, nothing suggestive, but Bucky goes still like something hit him point blank. The sensation lingers under his skin like heat that wonât dissipate. He stands there after youâve already moved away, hand flexing unconsciously at his side, eyes a little distant.
That touch lives rent-free in his head all week.
He tries to ignore it, pretend it meant nothing, pretend it didnât short-circuit something in him to feel such uncomplicated, gentle contact for no reason beyond necessity. He tries to move on, but itâs the only thing he thinks about when heâs lying in bed at night staring at the ceiling, trying to remember the last time someone touched him without expectation, without noise, without motive. The memory of your fingers feels soft enough to unspool him.
By the next Saturday, something shifts in how he moves around you. Itâs small, almost invisible, but you feel it.
When you hand him a container lid, his fingers brush yours intentionally this time. Barely. Just enough that you feel the ghost of contact. When you walk past him in the hallway, he steps a little closer so your shoulders graze. When you sit beside him at the table with your coffee, his knee rests against yours for a breath too long before shifting like heâs convincing himself it was an accident.
You donât call attention to it. You just quietly validate it by not pulling away. And that choice⌠that tiny, shared permission⌠is how the fixation begins.
One afternoon, youâre leaning in to show Natasha a little video clip your student sent you of their class hamster âlearning math,â which is basically the hamster running across number tiles. Youâre laughing, shoulder slightly turned, and Bucky stands behind you to look over your shoulder. His handâhesitant yet pulled by instinctâsettles lightly on your upper arm to balance himself for just a moment.
It should be nothing, it should be casual, it should be something people donât think twice about. Except Bucky feels everything about it. The softness of your cardigan, the warmth beneath it, the way you didnât flinch or stiffen or look uncomfortable. You just kept laughing with Natasha, leaning back into the space without even thinking.
He withdraws a second later, but he spends the next hour replaying that single point of contact in his head like a song loop. Sam tries to get him into a debate about which action movie trilogy is superior, and Bucky answers all wrong because heâs barely registered actual words. Steve gives him a suspicious side-eye when he zones out while cleaning equipment.
He is a grown man knocked absolutely senseless by a hand on an arm. You donât see that happening inside him, but you feel the aftereffects slowly appear. He starts finding reasons to stand beside you rather than across. When passing you utensils or napkins or tupperware, his fingers linger those fractions longer than needed. When you take a seat at the table, he takes the chair next to yours without hesitation now, casual like itâs obvious thatâs where he belongs.
And every single touch is feather light, polite, testing, non-assuming, but dripping with meaning. He never demands, he never grabs, he never rushes. He just lets himself slowly relearn the language of contact.
The station doesnât tease him about it. Somehow, collective unspoken agreement settles that nobody should scare him back inside his armor. Not when heâs finally stepping out piece by piece. Natasha catches a few moments between you two, her eyes sharper than anyone elseâs, but she simply smirks to herself because she sees the blessing of quiet healing when itâs right in front of her.
And you⌠you find yourself anticipating those small touches as much as he does. You donât chase them, you donât force them, you just gently meet them halfway every time he reaches.
And in the slow, silent corners of the station, where coffee steam curls in the low kitchen light and cinnamon and sugar linger in the air from last weekâs rolls, you watch a man rediscover something he hasnât allowed himself to want in years, the simple luxury of being touched without fear.
And Bucky learnsâone soft brush of skin at a timeâthat he wants more.
The next two Saturdays become this quiet study of small proximityâlike the space between you is its own gravity field and Buckyâs learning the pull of it in real time. It never happens in big gestures, never anything dramatic that would make the guys at the station crack jokes or ruin the fragile pace the two of you have found.
One Saturday you bring blueberry crumble bars. Natasha eats two, Sam tries to pick at the entire tray before Steve smacks his hand away like a disappointed parent. And Bucky sits next to you like that is the most natural place in the world to sit.
He doesnât even think about choosing another chair anymore. His body makes the decision before his mind can get in the way. His arm rests on the back of your chairânot wrapped around you, but behind you.
He doesnât even seem aware heâs doing it until halfway through your story about one of your students making up a conspiracy theory about why pencils exist, which was unhinged and adorable and your favorite thing all week, and then you see him slowly realize how close he actually is.
He should move, he knows he should move, but he doesnât.
You feel the warmth of him at your back, the way his presence curls lightly around your spine like a secret he forgot to keep hidden. You donât call it out, you donât flinch or shy away. You just stay exactly where you areâand you watch the moment he realizes youâre not pulling from him. His shoulders settle like a slow exhale.
Later, when Steve asks you to grab something from the supply closet, Bucky follows without thinking. He insists he needs to get new gloves too, though youâre almost positive every glove in that closet is alphabetized by size and condition like his personal religion. But heâs there, standing behind you as you reach for the plastic bin on the second shelf. You stretch a little further and lose your balance by just a degreeânot even enough to cause chaosâjust enough for your feet to shift.
Bucky catches your elbow. Not a reflex of panic, but a reflex of instinct. His palm slides warm and steady around the bend of your arm, fingers wrapping gently just above your wrist, grounding you with more tenderness than pressure. The touch is nothing more than supportâbut the gentleness in it makes your breath catch mid-inhale. âYou good?â he asks, voice low.
âYeah,â you say, turning toward him slightly with the bin held against your chest. Your arm is still in his hand. âJust misjudged how far back they shoved this.â
He doesnât drop your arm right away. His thumb shiftsâjust onceâin a tiny, unconscious sweep. Itâs barely movement, but it feels like a full sentence. And Bucky looks like he realizes in that exact millisecond that heâs gotten used to touching you. That he wants more of it.
He clears his throat and drops his hand, stepping back a respectable amountâbut the air between you stays charged. You donât push it, you just smile at him and head back out into the kitchen like nothing monumental happened, even though both of you are now thinking about nothing but that touch.
When you leave that evening, Bucky walks you to the door again. He always does now. No one calls attention to it. Itâs just routine. Your routine. At the door, you shift your bag higher on your shoulder and his hand rises automaticallyâlike heâs going to take it from youâlike heâs ready to help you carry it without thinkingâbut he catches himself halfway and lets his hand fall back down. Itâs so small. So ordinary. So charged. You give a soft smile, almost teasing, but not quite. âSee you next week?â
Thereâs no hesitation anymore. âYeah,â he says, eyes warm in a way thatâs new, edges less sharp. âIâll save you a seat.â
You donât know if he realizes how much more intimate that sounds compared to anything else youâve sharedâbut you leave with that sentence echoing through you the entire walk home.
By the next Saturday, Bucky starts waiting for the sound of your footsteps before youâve even parked your car outside. He doesnât tell anyone that, of courseâhe sits at the kitchen table with his mug like always, pretending heâs been there all morning, pretending he doesnât check the clock every five minutes. Sam catches him glancing toward the door once and smirks, but he doesnât say a word. No one does anymore. The teasing stopped the moment they realized something was happening quietly between the two of youâsomething delicate and steady that didnât need noise.
You always come in the same way: soft knock on the frame, a smile first, your voice warm with that teacher-bright tone that seems to filter out the stationâs gray edges. The kitchen fills with you as soon as you enter, like you bring your own weather with you. Today, your hair smells faintly like sugar and butter, and Bucky feels that scent settle somewhere low and calm inside him.
He greets you now, which still surprises you a little every time. âHey,â he says, voice still rough but softer around the vowels. He stands up when you walk inânot because he means to, but because it feels wrong to stay seated while youâre carrying something heavy. You hold up your containers and he reaches automatically, taking them from your hands before you can protest. The brush of fingers is so casual now that neither of you pause, but the quiet electricity is still there, pulsing underneath everything.
âGot your favorite,â you tell him, pointing to the smaller container. âCinnamon rolls. The others get the cookies this time.â
He gives a small nod, lips twitching at the corner. âYou really donât have toââ
âYou said to bring them again,â you interrupt, teasing. âYou canât take it back now.â
âDidnât say I was takinâ it back,â he mutters, and you catch the faintest ghost of a smile. Itâs there and gone in an instant, but itâs real.
You unload the cookies while Bucky takes the rolls to the far counter. He doesnât let anyone else near them until youâve had your share. Sam groans dramatically when he notices. âOh, so the rolls are exclusive now? Is that it?â Sam says, eyeing the container like heâs preparing for a heist.
âYeah,â Bucky says simply, not even looking up. âThey are.â
The room falls into a stunned silence for half a beat before Sam bursts out laughing, shaking his head. Natasha smirks from her corner with a knowing hum, and Steve hides his grin behind his coffee mug. Youâre half-laughing, half-embarrassed, warmth spreading through your chest like sunlight. Bucky doesnât even seem embarrassed about claiming themâor youâin that small, quiet way. He just sits down, pulls the lid off, and starts spreading frosting over one like itâs his ritual.
When you join him at the table, he slides the second roll toward you without looking, like itâs already decided. âMade sure I saved you one before Wilson tried to steal it.â
You take it with a small laugh. âThank you.â
The rest of the morning unfolds gently, the rhythm familiar now. You all linger in the kitchen longer than necessary, talking about nothing importantâschool stories, local events, the fair coming up in a few weeks. Natasha mentions volunteering for the kidsâ safety booth, and Bucky glances up when you say youâll be helping there too. He doesnât comment, but you see the flicker in his eyesâinterest, curiosity, something softer you canât quite name yet.
After a while, Sam and Steve head out to check equipment, and JoaquĂn leaves to run errands, leaving just you, Bucky, and Natasha in the kitchen. She excuses herself after a few minutes, mumbling something about needing peace before the chaos returns. That leaves the two of you alone at the table, the low hum of the fridge filling the quiet between sentences.
You start to stand to wash a few dishes, but Buckyâs hand finds your forearm before you can move. Itâs the lightest touchâbarely thereâbut his thumb brushes once against your sleeve. âLeave it,â he says. âYou cooked. Iâll clean.â
You freeze for half a second, not at the words, but at how naturally he touched you. He doesnât even seem to realize heâs done it until you look at him. His fingers stay there a second longer than they need to, warm and steady, before he lets go and reaches for the plates instead. You sit back down, quiet, watching him.
Heâs methodical when he cleansâcareful and exact. You catch the way he hums softly under his breath, a habit youâve never heard from him before. Itâs low and tuneless, but peaceful. When he turns to grab a towel, you stand and move beside him to help, not saying anything. The two of you move around each other easily, unspoken choreography. At one point, your hand reaches for the same mug heâs drying, and your fingers brush again. He doesnât freeze this time; he looks at you instead, his eyes flicking up, blue and tired and open.
âThanks,â you murmur, taking the mug.
âAnytime,â he says quietly.
You finish cleaning in silence, but itâs comfortableâthe kind of silence that feels shared rather than empty. When you finally pack up to leave, heâs leaning against the counter again, towel slung over his shoulder, hair a little damp from running his wet hands through his hair. He looks at you for a long moment before speaking. âYou always bring something,â he says, almost like heâs thinking out loud. âEven when youâve got a long week. Even when you look tired.â
You shrug, smiling a little. âItâs my way of winding down. And you all appreciate it. Mostly Sam,â you add with a laugh.
He huffs a laugh too, short but genuine. âI appreciate it more than I say.â
That catches you off guard, but you meet his eyes and see that he means it, completely. âI know,â you say softly. âI can tell.â
He nods once, then takes a breath like heâs going to add something else but decides against it. Instead, he steps closer and opens the door for you. You pass him on the way out, the scent of soap and cinnamon filling the small space between you. He doesnât move right away. The side of his arm brushes yours, just a whisper of contact, but the simplicity of it makes the moment feel big. âSee you next Saturday?â you ask, tilting your head slightly toward him.
His mouth quirks, barely a smile but enough to feel like one. âYeah. Wouldnât miss it.â
As you walk away, he lingers by the doorway for a moment, watching you until you turn the corner. When youâre gone, he looks back at the kitchenâthe empty mugs, the faint traces of cinnamon on the counter, the chair you always sit inâand for the first time in a long while, he realizes the week ahead feels like the wait between good things instead of the grind toward the next shift.
Saturday used to be just another day in the rotation. Now it feels like the only one that matters.
You show up to the station one Saturday and the kitchen is already⌠set up. Someone went and made space on the counter, like theyâd been expecting you and your containers. Someone laid out the cutting board, the butter knife, the napkins. Someone rinsed out the carafe and made a fresh batch of coffee thirty minutes before you arrived, just to make sure it would be hot when you walked in.
Itâs Bucky. Obviously.
He pretends he didnât. Pretends thatâs just how the kitchen always is. But Sam catches your eye and mouths you did this to him the moment Bucky walks away to grab mugs.
You hide your smile in your sleeve.
When you open your container today, you notice Bucky doesnât wait. He doesnât hang back like he needs to âpretend to think about it.â He comes to the counter first. He claims his plate first. He doesnât bother letting anyone else investigate what you brought before he does. He scoops icing and spreads it over his cinnamon roll with the same careful concentration youâve come to adoreâlike food is a language too, and slow is how he honors it.
No flashy commentary. No teasing. Just soft ownership. He bites in, eyes shuttering, jaw going slack for a millisecond before he pulls it back under control. You see his shoulders drop a fraction, like sweetness somehow releases tension in his spine. And then⌠he actually speaks before anyone else does. âThese are even better than last week.â
Sam nearly chokes on his coffee, Natasha quietly grins behind her cup like she just saw a planet finally rotate into alignment, and Steve pretends heâs not impressed, but he looks away to hide the way heâs smiling too hard.
And you just stand there, your heart doing something absurd, gentle, and painfully tender in your chest. Because he didnât say it begrudgingly. He didnât say it like he was forced or pushed, he offered praiseâvolunteer level, willingly.
You hand him a fork but he doesnât take it the regular way anymore. He takes it from your fingers directly, brushing skin intentionally this time. That subtle slide of his fingertip across yours is deliberate. It lingers a half beat longer than necessary. He could easily avoid contact but he chooses not to.
You sit beside him with your own roll, and for a good twenty minutes the room just fills with quiet chatter and slow chewing and contentment. It feels absurdly domestic, like a messy little chosen weekend breakfast you donât want to end. He doesnât fidget. He doesnât armor himself from the world. He doesnât isolate from the noise of his friends. He sits with youâlike this is where he fits.
At one point youâre telling him a story about a field trip your class is taking to the petting zoo and how youâre worried about one particular child trying to smuggle out a goat. He listens, leaning his chin into his palm, eyes on you the entire time like nothing else competes for his attention. Every few sentences he makes these tiny reactionsâlips pursing when you mention chaos, eyes softening when you describe their excitement, a quiet huff laugh when you mention bribes in the form of stickers.
Itâs this subtle emotional matching that sneaks up on you.
He isnât just listening. Heâs attuning.
When your plates are empty, he takes them from you automatically to rinse and dry. You donât even have to ask. You donât even have to offer. Thatâs just the role he takes now, unspoken. You cook. He cleans. Itâs the smallest domestic ecosystem that somehow feels like the most intimate thing youâve ever built with someone.
On your way out hours later, Steve and JoaquĂn are arguing about grill season, Natashaâs flipping through her paper, and Sam is half-dozing on the couch. Itâs loud but warm. Familiar but safe.
Bucky walks you out like always.
And this time, when you turn to say goodbye, he doesnât hover awkwardly or shove his hands into his pockets to protect himself. He stands a little closer and his eyes find yours without darting away. And in that space between breath and reason, his fingers catch the strap of your bag gentlyâjust hooking it in place as if helping settle it on your shoulder is second nature now. Itâs nothing dramatic. It doesnât send shockwaves. Itâs just⌠soft. âYou drive safe, alright?â he says, quiet but earnest.
You nod once, smiling. âI will.â
He lets his fingers slide away slowly. Not rushed. Not nervous. Because somewhere between cinnamon and quiet mornings, youâve become part of his weekend. Youâve become the only break in his routine he actually looks forward to.
And when the door closes behind you, the entire station sees the way he lets out a breath like holding himself together took effort he didnât want to spend anymore. Sam doesnât tease, Natasha doesnât smirk, and Steve just claps him once on the shoulder on his way past.
Bucky doesnât say it out loud, but everyone knows. Saturday is no longer just the day he endures. It has become the day he lives for.
By the time the school fair starts creeping closer on your calendar, youâve gotten comfortable in the routine. Saturdays are Bucky days now. Theyâre warm and easy and slow in a way that feels almost sacredâlike everything else in the week exists just to lead toward them. You donât say this out loud to anyone, obviously, not even Wanda, even though she definitely sees something changing. She sees it before you are ready to claim it.
Itâs Wednesday afternoon and youâre both in your classroom after dismissal. Wanda is perched on your desk, sipping from her tea, grading spelling tests and occasionally laughing under her breath at some of the answers. Youâre organizing your materials for the spring fair games, sorting little giveaway bags, taping up the poster that says âFOLLOW THE FOOTPRINTS FOR PRIZESââall glitter marker and 3rd grade chaos charm.
You think about the fair and immediately think about Bucky.
It pops into your head so naturally that it catches you off guard. Before, it wouldâve felt like a stretch⌠like worlds couldnât possibly overlap. But now, your worlds have already started to bleed into each other. He knows about your classroom, he knows your kidsâ nicknames, he knows your habit of stress-baking. And more importantly, he listens. Thatâs the part you canât let go of. The part where this man, who trusts almost nothing outside his own hands, trusts you.
Wanda glances over and catches that particular expression on your faceâthat soft internal conflict hovering at the edges of possibility. âYouâre thinking about something,â she says knowingly.
You blink. âWhat makes you say that?â
âYouâve been staring at the same sticker sheet for two full minutes,â she says with a little smirk. âAnd you only do that when youâre overthinking something.â
You look down and yeah, you are literally holding the same sheet of star stickers, frozen mid-air like your brain has been suspended in amber. You try to look casual, not suspicious. âI was just thinking⌠maybe I should ask someone to come. You know. Just for moral support. Itâs going to be chaos andââ
Wanda doesnât even let you finish. âYou should invite Bucky.â
You inhale sharply. âI didnât say it was Bucky.â
âYou didnât need to.â She laughs softly, finishing her tea before setting the mug down. âEvery time you talk about him you smile like someone just lit a candle inside you.â
You open your mouth to deny it, but she raises an eyebrow. The kind of eyebrow that says donât insult both of us by pretending. You sigh then, leaning back against the wall beside the glitter poster. âItâs different with him,â you admit quietly. âI donât⌠want to push him. Heâs slow. Heâs careful with everything.â
âAnd you already match him there,â Wanda says gently. âYouâre not rushing him. Youâre just⌠letting something grow.â
You chew your lip for a moment. âDo you think heâd even want to go? Itâs a school event. Loud kids, small town noise, crowds.â
âMaybe thatâs exactly the kind of trust bridge this kind of thing needs,â she counters, eyes soft. âItâs safe, itâs you. And he likes spending time with you, he lights up on Saturdays. Iâve literally seen it happen.â You flush, warm, because hearing it aloud makes your chest ache in a good way. Wanda leans closer, lowering her voice like this is a secret spell sheâs whispering just for you. âInvite him out of his world⌠and into yours.â
You look down at your glitter poster again, the little stars catching the classroom lights. You imagine him here, awkward but warm, secretly charmed by the kids, maybe helping you hold things or laughing at their terrible knock-knock jokes. You imagine his hand brushing your wrist as he hands you a prize bag. You imagine just⌠existing with him outside stainless steel tables and cinnamon rolls.
And suddenly it doesnât feel impossible. It feels⌠right. You exhale, steadying your voice. âOkay,â you say quietly. âIâll ask him on Saturday.â
Wanda smiles like she already knew you were going to say that. She reaches for her grading stack again, finalizing her last test. âGood. Because I think he needs to see that he belongs somewhere outside that station. And I think he deserves to see where you shine.â
You donât say anything for a moment. You let those words sink deep. And for the rest of the afternoon, while you staple more posters and prep game bins, your heart feels different. Lighter. Braver. The idea of inviting him doesnât feel terrifying anymore.
It feels hopeful. It feels like the next natural step in the slow burn youâve been building togetherâone cinnamon roll at a time.
Saturday comes, and you spend the morning trying not to overthink the invitation. Itâs ridiculous, reallyâyouâve spent months in the same room with Bucky, talking, laughing, baking, brushing hands and pretending itâs casual. Youâve built a rhythm. But this feels different. Asking him to the fair means stepping out of that familiar bubble. It means letting your two worlds touch. It means giving him a window into the life you built before he was part of it.
You bake early to keep yourself busy. Chocolate chip muffins this timeâsimple, comforting, impossible to mess up. You tell yourself youâll just see how the day goes. If it feels right, youâll ask. If not, no harm done. But even as you think it, youâre already choosing which words to use, rehearsing them under your breath while the muffins rise.
The station hums like always when you walk inâlow music, the sound of someone sweeping, laughter echoing from the common room. Youâre met with the same warmth thatâs become ritual, the same voices calling your name, the same easy energy that makes you feel like you belong.
But Buckyâs the first person you see. Heâs standing at the counter, sleeves rolled to his elbows, forearms dusted with flour. Heâs cookingâactually cookingâsomething in a skillet. The sight freezes you in place for a second. Itâs not because heâs cooking, though thatâs impressive enough, but because itâs the first time youâve ever seen him share that space the way you do. âMorning,â he says, glancing up from the pan. His voice is rougher than usual, but softer somehow. âYouâre early.â
âSo are you,â you tease, smiling. âDidnât peg you as the Saturday morning pancake type.â
He smirks faintly. âIâm not, but Samâs been bragging about his cooking all week, so I thought Iâd remind him what good actually tastes like.â
From the table, Sam yells, âyouâre using my recipe!â
Buckyâs smirk grows. âAnd somehow still making it better.â
You laugh, moving to set down your container of muffins. He looks at it, then at you, a flicker of curiosity in his eyes. âThose for us?â
âAlways,â you say. âFigured you might need something to go with your⌠culinary competition.â
He takes one of the muffins without hesitation. Itâs something youâll never stop noticingâthat small act of trust, how it still feels like a quiet miracle each time. He breaks it in half, steam curling up, and nods in quiet approval. âGood,â he says simply, like itâs law.
You help with the dishes while he finishes cooking, falling into that easy rhythm again. You hand him a towel, he hands you a spatula, the two of you brushing against each other in that familiar, subtle orbit youâve built. Every accidental touch feels intentional now. Every small space between you feels electric.
When everyone sits down to eat, you slide into the chair beside him automatically. Itâs become your seat; no one questions it. Bucky makes a show of setting your plate in front of you first, then his own. You catch Natasha watching him, her smirk small and secret, and you fight the urge to hide your smile behind your fork.
The conversation flows as it always doesâbanter, teasing, casual updates. You wait for the right moment, the right lull in the noise. When Steve gets up to grab more coffee and Sam starts talking about a neighborhood dog that wonât stop following their truck, you finally look toward Bucky. âHey,â you say quietly, just enough for him to hear over the chatter.
He glances at you, eyes steady. âYeah?â
âSo, my schoolâs having its spring fair next weekend,â you start, picking at your napkin. âItâs kind of a big thing for the kids. Games, food, chaosâgood chaos. I usually work one of the booths, but itâs a lot of running around.â
He listens closely, nodding a little. You can tell heâs trying to picture it.
You take a breath, deciding to just jump. âI was thinking⌠maybe you could come? You donât have to stay long, I just thought you might like to see it. Wandaâs volunteering tooâyouâd like her, sheâs great.â
Buckyâs brow furrows slightly. âYou want me to come to a school event?â
Thereâs no teasing in itâjust genuine surprise, a soft disbelief that someone would want him there. âI do,â you say simply. âYouâre good with people, even if you think youâre not. And I think youâd enjoy it. Plus, youâve heard about these kids for months, feels only fair you meet the legends.â
His mouth curves, small but real. He looks down at his plate, then back up at you. âYou really want me there?â
âYeah,â you say softly. âI do.â
He studies you for a long moment, like heâs trying to make sure this isnât pity or obligation. When he finally nods, itâs slow, thoughtful. âAlright,â he says. âIf youâre sure, Iâll come.â
You smile, warmth blooming in your chest. âGood. Iâll save you some cotton candy.â
He huffs out a quiet laugh. âNot sure I trust fairground food.â
âThen Iâll bring snacks,â you counter easily. âMy snacks. You trust those.â
His eyes linger on you, and something flickers thereâsomething softer, something that looks dangerously close to fond. âYeah,â he says quietly. âI do.â
The rest of the day passes like it always does, filled with chatter and work and the easy rhythm of routine. But beneath it, something new hums. You can feel it every time he looks at you, every time his hand brushes yours as you move around the kitchen.
And later, when you leave, he walks you to your car like he always does. The afternoon sun is soft on the pavement, the world unhurried. You turn to him before getting in, hand resting lightly on the door. âThanks for saying yes,â you say quietly.
He shrugs, but his voice is warm when he answers. âCouldnât let the kids down, could I?â
You grin. âOr me?â
He doesnât answer right away, just gives a small, almost shy smile. âYeah,â he says finally. âOr you.â
When you drive away, you see him still standing there in the rearview mirror, hands in his pockets, head tilted slightly like heâs still watching you go. And as you turn the corner, your chest feels full in a way thatâs new and familiar all at once.
Heâs coming into your world next week.
The fair day dawns bright and loud, the kind of spring morning that feels like sugar in the airâkidsâ laughter already echoing down the main street, vendors setting up booths, music floating from the community speakers. The smell of kettle corn and fried dough hangs over the whole town like a promise. You arrive early, wearing one of the school T-shirts with your name on the back, arms already full of poster boards and tickets. Itâs chaos, and you love it.
You help Wanda set up the game boothâring toss, bean bags, a giant jar of jellybeans for kids to guess at. Sheâs wearing sunglasses, sipping tea, looking like she owns the place, and occasionally humming in amusement every time a student runs up to greet you like youâre a celebrity. âThey worship you,â she says, adjusting the rings on her table. âYou know that, right?â
âTheyâre eight,â you laugh. âThey worship whoever gives them stickers and sugar.â
Still, the affection warms you. You love your kids, the energy, the noise, the chaos. But as the crowd thickens, a part of you canât stop flicking toward the street, scanning faces as if youâre expecting someoneâhoping, really. Wanda catches the motion. âYouâre looking for him,â she says without even pretending itâs a question.
You shrug, trying to seem nonchalant. âHe said heâd come. He doesnât have to, though. I wouldnât blame him ifââ
Wanda interrupts you with a small smile. âHeâll come. Heâs a quiet one, not a liar.â
You try not to overanalyze it, you focus on your booth, the crowd, the small joys of the morning. You laugh with your students, cheer when they win prizes, and help clean up spilled lemonade. Itâs easy to get lost in the noise, the blur of color and movement.
And thenâthere he is.
You donât see him approach right away. You feel him first, a subtle shift in the air behind you, the quiet weight of someone standing close but not too close. You turn, and Buckyâs there at the edge of the booth, one hand shoved into his pocket, the other holding a small brown paper bag. Heâs dressed differently than usualâstill simple, still him, but softer somehow. Jeans, a plain gray henley, sleeves pushed to his elbows. The sunlight catches in his hair, a faint breeze teasing it.
You freeze for a beat, because something about seeing him here, in your world, out of uniform and duty, hits deeper than you expected. âYou came,â you manage finally, voice caught between surprise and warmth.
He gives a small, lopsided smile. âTold you I would.â He holds up the paper bag. âBrought backup snacks, just in case fair foodâs as bad as I think it is.â
You laugh, the sound bubbling out of you too easily. âYou really didnât trust my cotton candy plan?â
âDidnât say I donât trust you,â he counters, and the way he says itâsteady, quiet, completely earnestâmakes your chest tighten.
Wanda materializes beside you like smoke, smiling at Bucky with that curious teacherâs-eye look she gives to every new person she meets. âSo youâre the infamous firefighter,â she says, extending her hand. âSheâs told me about you.â
Bucky shakes her hand politely, shooting you a look thatâs equal parts suspicion and amusement. âAll good things, I hope.â
âMostly,â Wanda says, smiling. âYouâre taller than I pictured.â
He huffs a soft laugh. âI get that a lot.â
You glare at her playfully, but she just waves and says, âIâll go check the dunk tank before the kids decide to flood it early,â before wandering off.
The two of you stand there, momentarily caught between laughter and quiet. Around you, the fair buzzesâkids running past, someone yelling about funnel cake, the smell of caramel apples thick in the air. But somehow, it feels like itâs just the two of you. âWant me to show you around?â you ask, trying to keep your voice steady.
âYeah,â he says softly. âLead the way.â
You walk through the fair together. He doesnât talk much at firstâhe doesnât need to. He listens, hands in his pockets, occasionally making some dry comment that makes you laugh. You take him past the art booths, where your studentsâ projects hang in rows of color, and he stops in front of one labeled with your name. Itâs a collage your class madeâa field of handprints in paint, each signed by a child, surrounded by cut-out letters that spell The Best Teacher Ever! Itâs uneven and smudged and perfect.
Bucky studies it longer than you expect him to, a faint softness pulling at his mouth. âThey really love you,â he says quietly.
You shrug, embarrassed. âTheyâre good kids.â
He glances down at you, something thoughtful in his eyes. âYouâre good with them,â he says simply. âIt shows.â
The compliment lands heavier than he probably intended. It isnât the wordsâitâs the way he says them, steady and sincere, like itâs not even a question, like itâs a fact.
You move on, showing him everythingâyour favorite stall for handmade candles, the game where the kids always cheat, the bake sale Wanda and the PTA moms are running. At one point, you find yourself next to him in front of the cotton candy machine, and you laugh as a gust of wind blows sugar threads into your hair. Without thinking, he reaches out and brushes them away.
The touch is brief, featherlight, but his fingers linger at your temple for half a second before dropping. His breath catches. Yours does too. âYouâve got, uh,â he mutters, clearing his throat. âSugar in your hair.â
âTragic,â you say, your voice a little too soft.
âCatastrophic,â he agrees, mouth twitching.
You both laugh, a little shy, a little stunned, and move on. But the touch stays, and it hangs there like a memory neither of you wants to disturb.
Later, as the afternoon fades and the crowd begins to thin, you sit on the curb with a paper cup of lemonade, your knees almost touching. The air smells like sun and sugar and pavement. You donât talk much, you donât have to, the silence feels full instead of empty.
âYou were right,â Bucky says finally, nodding toward the fairgrounds. âWasnât so bad.â
You smile at him, eyes squinting against the last bit of light. âTold you.â
He looks at you thenânot the quick glances he used to give, not the cautious observation from behind a wall, but openly, with quiet awe. Like heâs finally seeing how you look in your own world. Surrounded by color, laughter, tiny sticky hands tugging your sleeves, your voice still warm even after hours of talking.
For Bucky, something settles deep in his chest that he canât name. Itâs not attractionâheâs already been living in that. Itâs something deeper, more domestic. Itâs the feeling of home.
You notice the look but donât name it either. You just smile back, soft and unguarded. âThanks for coming,â you say quietly. âIt meant a lot.â
He shrugs, but thereâs no deflection in it this time. âAnytime,â he says, voice low. âI liked seeing your world.â
You sit there a little longer, until the lights start flickering on and the first stars slip out behind the clouds. And when you finally stand to leave, he offers his handânot out of obligation, not because itâs polite, but because itâs instinct now. You take it without hesitation. His palm is warm, steady, a little calloused. You hold on just a heartbeat longer than necessary.
And when you walk back through the fairgrounds, side by side, your hands brush again and again until they finally stay that way. Fingers linked loosely, not claiming, not rushing. Just⌠together.
The crowd hums around you, the night growing soft, and Bucky realizes something simple and terrifying all at once:
He doesnât just like your Saturdays anymore. He likes you everywhere.
He starts showing up in small ways outside Saturdays. Youâll be in your classroom after school prepping next weekâs math centers and there will be a knock at the door. You look up and heâs leaning in the doorway, one hand tucked in his jacket, holding a thermos of coffee like itâs the most casual thing in the world. He pretends heâs dropping it off because Steve accidentally made too much at the stationânot because he just wanted to see you.
But the second he steps into your room and sees your kidsâ artwork taped to the walls and your desk covered in glitter glue and fidget toys and half laminated name tags, he looks around like heâs inside something he never imagined existed: harmless chaos. âYou deal with this every day?â he murmurs, stunned but not mocking, eyes darting around like heâs trying to translate children in their natural terrain.
âAnd willingly,â you tease, passing him a marker so he has something to do with his hands before he overloads. âSome people like adrenaline. I like sticker negotiations and âplease stop licking the bookâ diplomacy.â
He huffs out that tiny almost laugh he doesâthe one at the edge of softnessâand helps you hang up a few more student drawings without saying anything else. And itâs the way he stands next to you, shoulder brushing yours every so often, that tells you he didnât come here because of extra coffee at the station at all. He came because he wanted to be here. Because being near you doesnât drain himâit restores something.
He starts noticing when youâre tired now, too. Not in a pitying wayâhe doesnât talk to you like you need fixing. He just quietly slides a container of his meal prep toward you when you mention skipping lunch. He brings extra apples one day and tosses one to you without even looking up from the newspaper. He casually hands you his jacket when you shiver taking trash out to the dumpster behind the station, acting like itâs not a big deal while his eyes track you the entire way back inside.
And you start to see how much he craves small, steady connectionâeven if he doesnât know how to ask for it. When you walk beside him now, he reaches for your arm lightlyânot tight, not possessive, just guiding. When you laugh, he leans in closer, almost subconsciously. When you hand him a napkin or utensil or anything at all, he always touches your fingers first before taking it from you. Like contact is becoming a language.
Sam notices before you do. One afternoon at the station, you reach across the table to pass Bucky a spoon and his hand slides along yours like muscle memory, like instinct, and Sam chokes mid swallow until Steve kicks his ankle under the table with military precision. Natasha doesnât say a wordâshe watches with narrowed amusement like she always knew this was exactly where the slow burn was heading.
And Bucky? He just keeps doing it. Little touches. Little claims disguised as casual nothing gestures. He doesnât call attention to them and neither do you. You just lean in gently, matching his pace, letting him guide in the small quiet ways heâs comfortable with.
The first time you walk outside together after a long Saturday shift and the night air settles cool against your skin, he reaches out and hooks his hand lightly behind your elbowâbarely pressure at allâbut you can feel how deliberate it is. You can feel that he wanted that contact. That he wanted you closer. âYou okay?â you ask softly, turning toward him.
He takes a slow breath before answering, looking almost surprised at himself. âYeah.â His voice is quiet, steady-sincere. âJust⌠making sure you donât get lost on the sidewalk.â
The excuse is thin. Laughable. Ridiculous. And when you look up at him with that sunshine softness he pretends doesnât undo him, he tries to scowl and fails. You donât call him out, you donât burst his cover. You just lean closer and bump your shoulder into his gently. âGuess Iâm lucky youâre here to keep me on track,â you say.
And he breathes in slow like your words went somewhere deeper than lungs. Because thatâs the part thatâs melting him the most. Not the baking, not the quiet weekends, not the familiar routine. Itâs the fact that when he reaches for youâhowever small, however hesitantâyou reach back without fear. And that kind of safety is something he hasnât let himself want in a very, very long time.
The kids were wild because itâs almost spring break, you spilled half your coffee down your front before first bell, and someone tried to feed the classroom fish a Cheez-It. Upstairs chaos and glitter. But you got luckyâthis week the lunch schedule shifted because of standardized testing, so you have a full, rare, unheard-of long lunch break. Wanda gives you a lazy little smirk and a sing-song âuse it wiselyâ before disappearing to the teacherâs lounge.
Youâre sitting at your desk when you hear the soft knock on your door. You donât even look up at firstâexpecting a student who forgot a water bottle or who needs a pencil sharpened even though class ended twenty minutes ago.
Then his voice fills the doorway, that calm, low, gravelly voice that already lives in your body now. âYou free?â
You look up so fast your neck might actually crack. Bucky stands just inside the threshold, one hand shoved in his jacket pocket, the other holding his helmet. A motorcycle helmet. He looks like the kind of trouble thatâs good for a soul no matter how you try to reason yourself out of it. You blink at the helmet, then at him. âWhat are you doing here?â
He shrugs, like itâs the most normal thing in the world that a stoic firefighter has just casually appeared in your classroom like he belongs there. âNatasha said you had a long lunch today. Thought Iâd steal you.â
You stare for a second and itâs embarrassing how warm your face gets. âSteal me?â
âBorrow,â he corrects, pushing off the doorframe and stepping deeper into the room. His eyes scan the chaosâmarkers everywhere, spelling posters half laminated, glitter flakes stuck to the tile floor, handprint art drying on the window sills. He takes it all in like he always does, curiosity softening him around the edges. âLunch?â
âYeah,â you breathe out, still a little startled. âYeah, Iâm free.â
He walks toward your desk slowly, eyes holding yours the entire time. âI brought the bike,â he says, lifting the helmet slightly so the light catches on the visor. âHope youâre not scared of motorcycles.â
You donât even hesitate. âIâm not.â
Something flickers across his face thenâsomething predatory but soft, like he just discovered a shared secret before itâs spoken. He holds out the helmet. You step around your desk and take it from him, fingers brushing over his as you do. His hand lingers against yours a second longerâsmall, steady contactâand your pulse kicks up instantly. âYou ready?â he asks, voice lower now. Warmer.
You grab your sweater, turn off your overhead lights, and slip out the door beside him. He rests his hand at the small of your back as you exit the building, guiding you gentlyânot pushy, not claiming, but protective in a way that feels instinctive and natural.
The bike is parked right outside the staff lot. Sleek, black, and intimidating in a beautiful way. You put the helmet on and he adjusts the strap for youâcareful thumbs brushing your jawline as he tightens it. His fingers tremble just slightly, barely there. âTrust me?â he asks.
You donât look away. âYeah. I do.â
The answer lands between you like something more binding than a promise.
He swings on first and you climb behind him, your hands hovering awkwardly for a half second before he reaches back and taps your thigh. âHold on,â he says quietly. You slide your arms around his waist, fitting against his back, cheek brushing between his shoulder blades. His muscles go taut, breath catching like that single contact might overload him. Then he settles, breathing you in slowly.
And then youâre moving.
The wind hits your body, the speed curling around your legs, your arms tightening instinctively around him, your cheek pressing into the soft worn cotton of his shirt. You feel the rumble of the bike beneath you, the warmth of his torso under your palms, the faint scent of woodsmoke and soap and something inherently him. It feels like flying through something youâve been waiting for without knowing it.
He takes you to a small diner on the edge of townâquiet, low key, with mismatched mugs and the best grilled cheese on the planet. He orders for both of you, gently nudging your knee under the table like heâs testing another version of contact heâs still learning he can have.
You talk about the fair again. You talk about his last call where nothing big happened and how Sam nearly got into a verbal duel with a neighborhood terrier. You tell him about a kid in your class who keeps trying to prove he can talk to worms. He listens like heâs cataloguing every detail, like your words are safely being stacked and labeled inside him.
When the check comes, you try to grab it but he gives you a look that says donât. You let him. And when you climb back onto the bike, he doesnât need to say hold on this timeâyou just do, arms sliding around him naturally.
The ride back is slower. Heâs not showing off this timeâheâs savoring the closeness. Back at the school parking lot, he helps unbuckle your helmet, fingers brushing your cheek, eyes locked on yours like the world shrank to three inches of space between you.
âThat was nice,â you say quietly.
He nods, voice low and certain. âYeah, we should do that again sometime.â A beat. âNot just Saturday.â
You feel it settle warm in your chestâthis gentle shift into something that looks and feels dangerously real. You smile. âIâd like that.â
He steps back reluctantly, like he doesnât actually want to put space back between you yet. But he does. Slowly. Respectfully. He tilts his head toward the school doors. âGo teach the tiny chaos gremlins,â he says, almost smiling. âIâll see you this weekend.â
You watch him leave on the bike, wind whipping his hair as he pulls away. And as he disappears down the street, you press your palm to your sternum and realize something with bone-deep certainty, he didnât steal you from school for lunch. He brought you into his world and let himself into yours again. And these small worlds are starting to not feel so separate anymore.
He doesnât tell Sam, or Steve, or anyone really. But little shifts start to happen when youâre not around. One day he shows up to the station with a different creamer in his bagâone heâd seen you use in your coffee at the diner. He puts it in the fridge under the guise of âsomeone left it at the store cheapâ but Sam wasnât born yesterday.
Another day, he spends an hour quietly fixing the hinge on the supply cabinet at your classroom when he stops by after a runânot because it was broken in any way that mattered functionally, but because you were frustrated with how it squealed every time you opened it. He doesnât tell you until you open it and it swings smoothly and youâre staring at him, dumbfounded.
âOh,â he says, shrugging like he didnât just spend his entire break doing it. âJust needed tightening.â
You start realizing he shows up when you need someone without you ever asking. And he doesnât make a spectacle of solving problems. He doesnât announce his presence or his help like some kind of performative hero thing, he just does it. And that quiet reliability begins to sink into you in a way that feels deeper than just comfort.
One afternoon after school, youâre sitting on the floor of your classroom grading math quizzes. Wanda is stapling a bulletin board. Youâre telling her about the lunch day with Buckyâthe motorcycle, the dinerâand youâre trying to say it calmly, rationally, like itâs not burning itself into your skin in the fondest way possible. Wanda just smiles a little, shaking her head as she aligns the border at the corner of the board. âYouâre already in it,â she says.
âAlready in what?â you ask, though your pulse spikes because you know. You absolutely know.
âThe middle of it,â Wanda says. âWhatever this is with him. Youâre already there.â
You want to deflect. Or joke. Or hide behind sarcasm. But instead, you sit back on your palms, expression softening. Thereâs no dramatic âaha moment.â Itâs just the quiet acknowledgment that sheâs right. Youâre already in it.
Later that week, Bucky ends up at the station kitchen with Steve late at nightâquiet, low music humming through the empty room. He sits with a mug between his hands, thumb brushing the rim in slow thought. Steve washing out a pot stops and just regards him for a moment. âYou really like her,â Steve says suddenly, not unkind, just observant.
Bucky doesnât look up right away. He stares down at the mug like it holds the answer. He doesnât smirk. He doesnât deflect. He doesnât growl his way out of it. He just breathes once through his nose and lets the truth exist between them. âYeah,â he says quietly. âI do.â
Steve smiles faintly, shaking his head. âI havenât seen you this relaxed with anyone in years.â
âItâs different,â Bucky says, still not meeting his eyes. âSheâs⌠soft. And steady. Doesnât push. Doesnât expect anything from me I canât give.â
Steve leans back against the counter, arms crossed. âSheâs good for you.â
Buckyâs jaw works for a second. He finally looks up, blue eyes tired and open. âI think I want to be good for her too.â
Steve doesnât tease him for it. He doesnât smirk or make a comment about feelings. He just nods once. âThen let it happen. Donât think your way out of it.â
Bucky sits there long after Steve heads to bedâhands cupped around warm ceramic, staring into nothingârealizing there was no wall left to pretend to hide behind. Because somewhere between cinnamon rolls and motorcycle rides and tiny classroom repairs⌠he already stepped out of it.
And on the other side of town, you lay in bed later that night under the soft glow of your bedside lamp, re-reading your lesson plan, unable to fight the quiet smile that keeps pulling at your mouth every time you remember how he looked at you today. How he stood closer. How he listened with that focus of his like you were the only thing he wanted to absorb in the room.
This isnât an almost-crush anymore. This isnât âsomethingâs maybe happening.â This is real. This is slow and gentle and certain. And both of youâwithout ever saying it out loudâfinally understand it.
One Saturday morning at the station, youâre helping Sam chop fruit for some post-cleaning brunch and Bucky walks in, hair still wet from his shower. You smell the cedar shampoo on him before he even speaks. Without hesitating, he comes to stand beside you at the counter, close enough that his arm presses firmly against your side. He doesnât move away. Doesnât pretend he didnât notice. His shoulder stays flush with yours while you slice strawberries, like touching you is now his default starting point instead of a privilege that surprises him.
Sam glances at the way your bodies align and mutters something dramatic about âthe universe shiftingâ before Bucky casually kicks his shin under the island counter, not even looking up from the fruit bowl. Sam hobbles away laughing to himself and Natasha smirks from the corner because sheâs been waiting for this exact evolution.
Later, when you and Bucky take a break outside, youâre leaning against the front of the firetruck, sipping iced tea from a plastic cup. The early spring sun is warm against your skin. Bucky stands closeâclose enough that when the breeze hits, your sleeve brushes his forearm. He doesnât shift away like he used to; instead, he rests his hand lightly against the small of your back.
Your breath catchesânot because you werenât expecting it, but because it feels so wonderfully normal. Instinctive. You donât even look at his hand; you just lean gently into the contact, letting your body melt into that simple warmth like it belongs. âYou got any plans later?â he asks, voice rough from the cool air.
âJust grading and laundry,â you answer. âNot exciting.â
He hums, thumb stroking the back waistband seam of your jeans in a small unconscious arc. âI could come by after shift. Fix that shelf you said was wobbly. We could order something in.â
You turn your head toward him, heart thudding slow and heavy. âIâd like that.â
He nods, eyes soft. No tease, no guard, just quiet meaning sitting heavy in the air between you. When you part ways later, his fingers trail gently along your wrist before letting go. Itâs not accidental. Itâs not subtle. And the feeling stays in your skin the entire drive home.
A few days later, it happens againâthis time in your classroom when he stops by with coffee. Youâre busy sorting folders and he leans against your desk, watching with that soft, observant attention heâs only ever given you. When you reach for the stack beside him, his hand covers yours and he holds it thereânot just a brush of fingertips, but a slow, deliberate press. âTake a break,â he murmurs.
You look up at him, pulse fluttering under his palm. You donât pull away and he doesnât either. The stare lasts longer than it ever hasâno one darting their eyes away this time. He lifts your hand slightly, thumb brushing small circles into your skin, almost reverent in how gentle it is. Like heâs memorizing the shape of you by touch alone.
And then, one night after dinner at your placeâheâs fixing that shelf just like he said he wouldâyou end up sitting on the floor organizing books and he ends up sitting beside you. The shelf is done, but neither of you move. His knees are bent, long legs stretched out in front of him, and your hip leans against his thigh where you sit shoulder to shoulder.
At one point, you shift to reach for a new stack of books⌠and he catches your hand again. But this time he doesnât release it. This time his fingers slide slowly, intentionally between yours, interlacing like itâs the most natural progression in the world. Both of you freezeânot in panic or shockâbut in sudden, quiet awareness.
The world goes gentle around the edges. His thumb strokes the inside of your hand again, slow and almost absent-minded like this is something heâs been wanting to do for weeks. You watch his eyes drop to your joined hands before lifting back to yoursâopen, calm, quiet.
No one speaks first because this moment doesnât need narration. It is already declaration. Your head tilts slightly into his shoulder, and he exhales slow against your hairâlike every tension he used as armor for years is starting to melt.
This isnât guiding. This isnât accidental. This isnât helping. This is wanting. And for the first time, Bucky isnât afraid to show that he wants you.
Itâs a Tuesday. The school is hosting a district-wide teacher workshop, and youâre surrounded by colleagues you only see a few times a year. Thereâs a lunch spread in the libraryâhalf sandwiches, fruit, and cookies that look far better than they taste. Bucky had texted you that morning to tell you he was swinging by later with a container of stew, âreal food,â he called it, so youâre in good spirits.
Thatâs when Adamâthe new P.E. teacherâwalks in. Heâs all easy smiles and too much cologne, with that comfortable charm that gets him volunteered for every fundraiser and assembly. You know him in passing; heâs nice enough, good with the kids, harmless in the way men who havenât been hurt often are. He waves when he sees you and walks right over.
You chat politelyâjust small talk about class schedules, the fair last month, his new after-school soccer program. Itâs perfectly innocent. But when he leans closer to joke about your third graders and the âmystery glitter epidemic,â his hand brushes your elbow in a way thatâs friendly but too familiar. You donât think twice about it, laughing it off.
Except thatâs the exact moment Bucky walks into the library.
You spot him over Adamâs shoulder instantlyâdark jacket, thermos in one hand, that quiet confidence he wears like second nature. He was supposed to wait in your room, but of course he found you first. He always does. His expression is unreadable at first, all neutral and calm, but then his gaze dips to where Adamâs hand lingers near your arm before you move away.
Itâs barely a flickerâa tightening of his jaw, a small stillness in his bodyâbut you feel it. You know him well enough now to recognize the quiet current under the surface.
You excuse yourself from Adam politely and cross the room to meet Bucky halfway. His eyes soften as soon as youâre close, like the act of you coming to him defuses whatever sparked that flash of heat in his chest. âHey,â you say gently, smiling. âYou found me.â
He nods, voice low. âYeah. Library wasnât hard to guess.â
You glance down at the thermos and laugh. âYou brought lunch.â
âStew,â he says simply. âDidnât want you living off whatever those are.â He nods toward the sad sandwiches, and you grin.
âYouâre my hero.â
He tries to hide the faintest twitch of a smile, but itâs there. The jealousy isnât ugly in himâitâs quiet, protective, edged in something vulnerable. You see it in the way he stands slightly closer to you than usual, the way his hand finds the small of your back while you walk toward an empty table, a small gesture that says youâre mine, right? without words.
You sit together, sharing his stew from the same thermos, and the world narrows until itâs just you and him. He doesnât bring up Adam, doesnât say a word about what he saw, but itâs in the way his fingers brush yours when he hands you the spoon, lingering a little longer than necessary. Itâs in the way he looks at you when you laugh, softer now, calmer.
âThanks for this,â you say, blowing on your spoon. âIâd be starving without you.â
âCanât have that,â he mutters.
The silence after that isnât awkwardâitâs thick with unspoken things. You can practically feel what heâs thinking. Later, when the workshop ends and youâre walking him out to the parking lot, you bump his arm lightly. âYou okay?â you ask.
He glances at you, startled by the question. âWhy wouldnât I be?â
âYouâve been quiet.â
He exhales through his nose, rubbing at the back of his neck. âJust⌠didnât like seeing that guy touch you, thatâs all.â
You stop walking, blinking up at him. His tone isnât sharpâitâs hesitant, almost sheepish, as if heâs embarrassed by his own honesty. You step a little closer, voice gentle. âIt wasnât anything. Heâs just friendly.â
âI know.â He shrugs, half-smiling but not looking at you. âStill. Didnât like it.â
You study him for a momentâthis big, careful man whoâs spent years keeping everything locked up tightâand your heart squeezes. You reach out, curling your fingers around his wrist until his hand relaxes in yours. âYou can tell me stuff like that,â you say softly. âYou donât have to swallow it.â
His gaze lifts slowly to meet yours. âYou donât think itâs⌠too much?â
You shake your head. âI think itâs kind of sweet, actually.â
That earns a small, reluctant grin from himâhalf relief, half self-deprecation. He looks down at your joined hands, turning them slightly so his palm faces up and your fingers slide together more naturally. âGuess Iâm bad at playing it cool,â he admits.
You smile. âI like you better when youâre not trying to.â
Something warm flickers in his eyes at that, something unguarded and bright. He squeezes your hand once, firm and sure, and you both start walking again. And later that evening, when he drops you off at home, he doesnât just walk you to the door. He hesitates there, hand still in yours, thumb tracing your skin like heâs memorizing it. âJust so you know,â he says, voice quiet but steady, âIâm not going anywhere. Even if thereâs a line of guys waiting to bring you sandwiches.â
You laugh, soft and easy, leaning into him slightly. âI think Iâll stick with the guy who brings real food.â
That earns you his real smileâthe one that breaks slow and a little shy before it settles into something sure. He bends just enough to press a light kiss to your forehead, lingering there for one heartbeat longer than he should. And when he pulls back, his voice drops to a whisper meant only for you. âGood. âCause I donât plan on sharing.â
Itâs not possessive, not sharp. Itâs gentle, warm, threaded with affection thatâs been waiting months to breathe. And as you stand there with his hand still holding yours and the faint smell of stew and smoke between you, you realize something simple and certainâBucky Barnes may not know how to be loud about his feelings, but when he loves, he does it with his whole, careful, deliberate heart.
His place is small, warm, and lived-in in a way that feels startlingly intimate without being messy. You notice instantly that the kitchen is the heart. Sharp knives hung neatly, cast iron pans seasoned black from years of use, spice jars lined and labeled by hand.
He hands you a wine glass the moment you shrug your coat off and hangs your cardigan himselfâcasual, like heâs always done that. The steady domesticness of it hits you like a soft weight in the chest.
âWhatâre we making?â you ask, leaning against his counter, watching the way he moves around his kitchen.
âSomething simple,â he says, pulling out vegetables like itâs second nature. âRoasted chicken thighs, potatoes, salad. Nothing fancy.â Then a tiny ghost of a smirk. âDonât wanna scar you with my seasoning ratio math first round.â
You laugh, take a sip of the wine, and step beside him. âYou seriously think Iâd be scared?â
âYou saw Sam try to replicate my marinade,â he says dryly. âIt traumatized him.â
Cooking together becomes its own language. When he hands you ingredients, his fingers linger along yours instinctively. When you reach for a bowl beside him, his arm brushes yours and he doesnât pull away. You chop alongside him at the butcher block and thereâs something about the quiet, rhythmic slide of the knife and the way he nudges your hip lightly with his own that feels almost like dancing.
He moves around you with this ease that tells you he memorized your presence alreadyâadjusting without thinking, making space for your elbows, brushing his knuckles against your arm occasionally as if grounding himself. The silence isnât empty. Itâs that warm kind that fills the walls with comfort.
Halfway through seasoning the chicken, you catch him watching you. Not intensely like he does sometimes when he studies you⌠but soft. Affection written plain across his face. He realizes heâs staring and blinks, looking down like heâs embarrassed, but you reach out and touch his wrist gently.
You donât say anything. You donât need to.
When the food goes into the oven, he pours you both fresh wine and you settle on the couch while the kitchen timer ticks quietly in the background. The moment you sit down, he hesitates only a second before sitting beside youânot at the other end like he mightâve weeks ago. He sits close. Knee against your thigh. Shoulder brushing yours.
The TV hums some sitcom rerun neither of you actually watch. You talk about small thingsâyour terrible indoor plant survival rate, his disdain for store bought marinades, a kid from your class who insisted Jupiter is a portal to a toy dimension. He listens, relaxed and open, eyes slipping lower and lower the longer you talk.
Then, not suddenly but naturally, he lets his head rest against the back of the couch closer to you. Heâs angled toward you, body soft, guard down. His hair brushes your shoulder and you feel this tugâthis impulse that youâve been resisting for months.
You lift your hand and brush a stray strand behind his ear and he goes still immediately. You pause. âOkay?â
He swallows once, nods once, slow. âMore than okay.â
So you let your fingers slowly slide through his hairâsoft, deliberate, carding through it gently. He exhales like it pulled breath from somewhere deep inside his sternum. His eyes flutter shut, jaw slackening, posture melting deeper into the couch as if his body doesnât remember how to hold tension with you touching him like this.
He leans into your touch. Not subtly. Fully. His head tips closer to your shoulder, his hand finds your knee lightlyâjust resting there, warm and steady. Thereâs this magnetic, quiet honesty in the way he seeks contact now. Heâs not shy about wanting more time in your hands. âThis feels⌠good,â he murmurs, voice rough with something vulnerable, something unused. âHavenât had someone touch me like that in⌠I donât even know.â
You slow your fingers slightly, cupping the back of his head gently. âI like doing it,â you whisper. âYou can ask for this anytime.â
His hand tightens a fraction on your knee. He turns his head a little toward youânot kissing you, not rushing anythingâbut close enough that you feel his breath soft against your collarbone. And when he opens his eyes again, the softness in them is so intense it makes your heart stutter.
The oven timer breaks the momentâbut even when he stands to go check the food, he does it reluctantly, like heâs leaving something warm and important behind on that couch.
Dinner is cozy and quiet and shared from the same side of the table like that closeness is the new normal. And afterwards, when he walks you to the door and helps you into your coat, his fingers slide up your arms, gentle and warm and slowâlike heâs memorizing the shape of you again before you step away. âYou coming by Saturday?â he asks softly, thumb brushing your wrist one last time before he lets go.
You nod, leaning a little closer because you donât want to leave that softness behind yet. âI wouldnât miss it.â
He opens the door, but before you step out, he brushed his knuckles lightly across your cheek. The smallest gesture. But it feels like he just placed something inside your ribs thatâs going to keep burning all week until you see him again.
The station usually rotates who does the big supply run for the weekâmostly because Sam buys random snacks he wants, Steve buys everything organic like a betrayed suburban mom, JoaquĂn buys the weird cereal no adult should ever want, and Bucky considers grocery ingredients sacred resources not to be compromised by chaos.
This week, Sam insisted it was a âteam building group outingâ and for reasons unknown to humanity⌠they all agreed. And you ended up coming along because Natasha texted you casually that morning: bring Bucky snacks and come entertain me, I donât want to shop with these idiots alone.
You show up to the station first, in soft jeans and a sweater that Bucky immediately notices because he looks up from tying his boots and does a slow blink like his brain took a picture of you before he remembered to breathe. He doesnât say anythingâhe just gives a barely-there smile and murmurs, âhey,â like the word feels different when itâs directed at you.
The grocery store is busy the way Saturday late morning always isâfamilies, couples, old women with coupon binders, teenagers attempting independence with energy drinks and frozen pizza.
Natasha pairs off with JoaquĂn because she doesnât trust him not to buy âexperimental spicy cerealâ and Steve and Sam argue over protein shakes. Which leaves you and Bucky in produce.
Youâre holding the list Sam scribbled and reading out loud, âtwo bags spinach, bell peppers, potatoes, berries, sourdoughââ Heâs already grabbing things methodically, moving with quiet focus. And you follow along beside him, gently teasing him about being aggressively efficient. âYou plan grocery trips like tactical missions,â you comment, watching him inspect potatoes like they might carry classified intel.
âBad produce ruins meals,â he says simply, shrugging as he rolls a potato in his palm. âCanât risk it.â
You laugh, shaking your head. âYouâre such a snob.â
His eyes flick toward yours and warm slightly. âYou like that Iâm picky with food.â Your heart does that absurd jump again. Because heâs rightâyou absolutely do.
At one point, you reach up to grab something from a higher shelf, coffee beans that Sam wrote three underlines under, and Bucky steps behind you automaticallyânot hovering, not crowdingâbut close enough you feel his presence like a shield. His hand settles briefly at your waist as if steadying you. Just a moment. But long enough for warmth to spread through your body.
You donât rush away from the contact this time, you lean back slightly into it, and he doesnât pull his hand away as fast as he used to. Instead, he lets it linger. His thumb brushes, deliberately gentle, like a silent word.
When you turn toward him again thereâs something new in his faceâsoft certainty. You move further down the aisle together, the list half done, and somewhere between yogurt and granola bars, a toddler in a dinosaur hoodie barrels past you both and nearly knocks into you. Buckyâs reflex is instantâhe reaches out, steadying your elbow, guiding you smoothly aside before the tiny chaos tornado continues screeching toward frozen waffles.
You laugh, a little breathless. âWow. Good reflex.â
He hums, unconsciously stroking your arm once before letting go. âYears of dealing with Sam.â
You start walking again, your fingers brushing his at your side. And this time when they touch⌠he turns his hand palm-up.
Offering.
Not an accident, not a hesitant brush disguised as movement. He wants you to take it.
And you do.
You slide your fingers into his slowly, threading them together, palm against palm, skin warm and certain. His grip tightensânot forceful, but firm. Intentional. Claiming in the quietest, softest way. He looks down briefly, as if memorizing the sight of your hands together, then looks forward again like heâs grounding himself in this moment.
Thereâs no panic in his breathing. No tension in his shoulders. Just that gentle steadiness heâs slowly letting himself have with you.
And he doesnât let go the entire rest of the store trip.
Not while you check out. Not while you help load groceries in the cart. Not even when Sam comes back and does a double take so dramatic Steve smacks him in the back of the head and says, âdonât scare it, let it happen naturally.â
Natasha doesnât even react. She just gives you this tiny knowing smirk when she sees your joined hands like sheâs been waiting for this exact beat for weeks. When you all walk out of the store, Bucky carries the heavier bags and keeps your hand in his free one like itâs just what his body does now. Like this is a new base state.
When you get to the cars, before anyone else climbs in, he shifts closer, thumb brushing along your knuckles as the morning sun warms the pavement between you. âThat alright?â he asks quietly, nodding toward your hand in his. âThis?â
You squeeze his hand once, soft and certain. âYeah. More than alright.â
And the look he gives you thenâopen, relieved, a little overwhelmed and entirely devotedâtells you everything you need to know, hand holding wasnât a milestone for him. It was him choosing you openly, without fear.
Itâs late, the stationâs been busier than usual that week, and Buckyâs more tired than youâve ever seen him. Youâd stopped by with dinnerâhomemade soup, still warm in the containerâand stayed to help clean up after the teamâs shift meal. The others trickled out one by one, voices fading upstairs or into the night until it was just you and him left in the kitchen.
The lights are low, humming quiet. The sink runs with a steady rhythm while he dries a pan, towel slung over his shoulder, sleeves rolled to his forearms. Youâre leaning against the counter beside him, sipping tea from one of the chipped mugs they all use. Itâs comfortable, easy silenceâthe kind that fills up a room instead of emptying it.
He glances sideways at you occasionally, eyes softer than the dim light should allow. âYou didnât have to stay,â he says finally, setting the pan on the rack.
You shrug, smiling into your cup. âDidnât want you cleaning up alone.â
He hums in quiet agreement, folds the towel carefully. âYou always stay.â
âGuess I do,â you murmur. âYou mind?â
Bucky turns toward you then, leaning against the counter with his hip, one arm resting loosely over the edge. âNo,â he says. Then, after a beat, âI think Iâve started counting on it.â
The air thickensânot heavy, but aware. You set your mug down, fingers curling around the edge of the counter to keep them busy. Heâs close enough that you can feel the heat off him, the faint smell of cedar and smoke that always clings to him. Your heart beats a little too loud for the quiet in the room.
His gaze drops brieflyâto your hands, then to your mouthâand thatâs when something in your chest breaks open. He doesnât move closer yet, but you feel the intent in him. The restraint, the quiet question thatâs been there for months.
You donât answer with words. You step forward, just a fraction, until youâre standing directly in front of him. His hand, resting on the counter, twitches once. His throat works in a slow swallow. âBucky,â you whisper, voice barely carrying.
âYeah?â he answers, the word soft and hoarse, like itâs dragged up from somewhere deep.
âI think Iâve started counting on it too.â
For a heartbeat, neither of you move. The air feels like itâs holding its breath with you. Then his hand liftsâhesitant but deliberateâfingers brushing along your jaw, thumb grazing the corner of your mouth. Itâs reverent, almost uncertain. You can feel him trembling faintly, not from nerves but from the sheer weight of wanting and the fear of breaking the moment.
You lean into his touch, just enough to let him know itâs okay.
Thatâs all it takes.
He leans forward, slow, eyes flicking between your eyes and lips until the space between you collapses. The first touch of his mouth is so soft it barely registers as a kissâmore like an exhale, a testing of pressure, a question whispered against your skin. He starts to pull back, unsure, but you chase him forward, catching his bottom lip between yours and answering the question he didnât dare ask.
The second kiss isnât hesitant.
Itâs slow, yes, but sureâlike something heâs been building toward for months. His hand slides from your jaw to the back of your neck. Your hands find his shirt, gripping lightly at his chest as if to steady yourself against the quiet, dizzying rush of it all. He tastes faintly like coffee and something darker, something entirely him. He kisses like he touchesâgentle but grounding, all patience and careful strength.
When he finally pulls back, he doesnât move far. His forehead rests against yours, his breath warm and uneven. You stay like that, neither of you ready to break the fragile stillness. Heâs the first to speak, voice low and rough at the edges. âBeen wantinâ to do that for a while.â
You smile, still breathless. âYeah,â you whisper. âI know.â
He huffs a quiet laugh, the sound vibrating where his chest meets yours. His thumb traces a slow path along your jaw, memorizing. âDidnât think Iâd get here. Not really.â
You pull back just enough to meet his eyesâthose tired, storm-blue eyes that have softened into something that feels like home. âYouâre here now,â you say softly. âThatâs what matters.â
He nods once, eyes still locked on yours, and you can see the truth settle into him. Whatever walls heâs spent years holding up, theyâve finally stopped being barriers between you. Now theyâre just backgroundâthe ruins of something that doesnât need rebuilding because what youâre creating together is better.
He leans in again, kissing you slower this time, longer, his hand splayed against your back, anchoring you both in that quiet, golden kind of certainty that doesnât need words. And when you finally part, the clock ticks softly in the background, the world outside the station hushed and distant.
He brushes his thumb across your bottom lip, voice barely more than a whisper. âI want this. I want you.â
You nod, heart full enough to hurt. âThen youâve got me.â
He doesnât say thank you, he doesnât need to. He just smilesâsmall, real, a little dazedâand presses one last kiss to the corner of your mouth before pulling you gently against his chest.
And for the first time in years, Bucky lets himself simply exist in the quiet peace of being held.
One Year Later
The first thing Bucky notices when he wakes is the space beside him. Itâs warm but empty, the sheets folded back, the soft indentation still in the pillow where youâd been. His hand finds that spot instinctively, fingers brushing over the cotton like maybe youâd only just left. He breathes in onceâslow, easyâand the faint smell of something buttery and sweet reaches him before he even opens his eyes.
He knows where you are. He always does on Saturdays.
The clock on the nightstand reads a little past seven, sunlight already spilling through the curtains in pale ribbons. He stretches, lazy and slow, rubbing at the back of his neck before swinging his legs off the bed. The floorboards creak softly under his bare feet as he stands, tugging on the flannel pants he left draped over the chair last night. The air smells like sugar and pastry, something faintly tart beneath itâraspberry, he realizesâas he heads down the short hallway toward the kitchen.
Youâre there, exactly where he expected, standing at the counter in one of his old shirts, with the sleeves rolled up. The radio hums softly from the windowsill, some old song you probably found in one of those âweekend morningâ playlists you love. The kitchen is alive with the sound of itâmetal trays clinking, the gentle hum of the oven, your quiet hum matching the music as you drizzle chocolate over neat, golden pastries cooling on a wire rack.
He stops in the doorway, leaning a shoulder against the frame. For a long moment, he doesnât say anything. He just watches you, watches the way your body moves so easily in this space that used to be only his. The way the light catches on your hair and the corner of your smile when you hum along to the song. The way this apartment smells like home now, like you.
âSmells dangerous,â he finally says, voice still gravelly from sleep.
You turn, eyes lighting up instantly when you see him. âYouâre up.â
âCouldnât sleep through that.â He gestures toward the pastries, walking over until heâs close enough to rest a hand on the small of your back. âYouâre making the station spoiled.â
âThey asked for raspberry this time,â you say, grinning up at him. âAnd I couldnât say no.â
âYou never do.â His thumb brushes along your spine, slow and absent, a quiet kind of affection thatâs become as natural as breathing.
You lift one of the pastries carefully from the tray, holding it toward him. âQuality control,â you offer.
He leans in to take it but stops halfway, eyes glinting as he murmurs, âyou sure this isnât bribery?â
âMaybe a little,â you admit.
He huffs a laugh, low and warm, and takes a bite. The pastry flakes against his lips, sweet and tart, the chocolate melting just enough to coat his tongue. âYeah,â he says after a moment, voice thoughtful. âThatâll do.â
You roll your eyes, laughing softly as you turn back to the tray. âHigh praise, chef.â
Bucky steps closer behind you, hands sliding around your waist until his chest presses lightly against your back. You let yourself lean into him, the rhythm of his breathing syncing with yours as he rests his chin on your shoulder. He smells like sleep and warmth, and his voice when he speaks next is soft enough that it feels like part of the morning air. âYou gonna take all these to the guys?â
You nod. âMost of them. I promised Natasha a box but I thought Iâd save a couple for us.â
He hums approvingly, lips brushing against your temple. âGood plan. JoaquĂnâll inhale his before you even park.â
You laugh quietly, shaking your head. âThatâs why I make extras.â
For a while, neither of you speak. The oven ticks as it cools, the radio shifts to another song, and his hands stay splayed comfortably against your stomach, fingers tracing small, slow circles through the fabric of his shirt that youâre wearing. When you finally turn in his arms, your palms slide up his chest until they rest against his shoulders.
He looks down at you, eyes half-lidded, the kind of soft he only ever gets with you. You rise onto your toes and kiss himânothing rushed or desperate, just the familiar, grounding kind of kiss that feels like a language you both invented together. When you pull back, he follows slightly, just enough that your noses brush. âMorning,â you whisper.
âMorning,â he echoes, voice low, a tiny smile tugging at his mouth. âYou got flour on your face.â
You laugh, rubbing at your cheek. âDo I?â
He leans in and kisses the spot instead, the faintest graze of lips against skin. âGot it,â he murmurs.
You shake your head, grinning, and reach up to ruffle his hairâsomething you do every time he gets too serious. He catches your wrist gently before you pull away, turning your palm so he can press a kiss into the center of it. Then he lets go, stepping back just enough to look around the kitchen. âNeed help packing these?â
âYeah, actually,â you say, reaching for the containers. âIf you can box up the ones for the guys, Iâll do Natâs.â
He nods, already moving toward the counter. âYou sure you trust me not to eat âem?â
âIâll count them before we leave,â you tease, bumping his hip with yours.
He chuckles, grabbing a pastry anyway and taking another bite before you can protest. âYou didnât count this one,â he says around a mouthful.
You swat at him with the edge of a towel and he laughsâreally laughs, the sound filling the whole apartment until it feels like the walls themselves are smiling. Itâs easy, this life with him. Easy in the way mornings like this feel endless. The light through the window. The smell of raspberries and coffee. His hand brushing yours as you both reach for the same pastry box.
When everythingâs packed and youâre slipping your shoes on by the door, he comes up behind you again, arms wrapping around your waist from behind, chin resting in the crook of your neck. âYou sure you donât wanna stay here?â he asks softly. âWe could keep the raspberry ones hostage.â
You tilt your head just enough to brush your cheek against his. âTempting,â you say. âBut I already promised. And besidesââ you turn, smiling up at him, ââI like bringing them something sweet.â
He smirks, kissing your forehead before letting go. âYeah. Theyâre lucky to have you.â
You pick up the pastry box, glancing back at him. âYou ready?â
âAlways,â he says, and means it. He takes the keys from the counter, holds the door open for you, and when you step out into the hallway, he reaches for your hand without even thinkingâhis fingers finding yours like they always do.
And as the door closes behind you both, the scent of raspberry and sugar lingers in the air, curling softly through the quiet apartment thatâs no longer just his, and never will be again.
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â Salma Deera, Letters From Medea
[text ID: The centre of every poem is this: / I have loved you. / I have had to deal with that.]
"how are you" well i got a long term plan with short term fixes and a wasted heart that just eclipses and i push my luck from trust to dust enough. you know.



