Well, salt my melon

the enemy drank water today. did you?

i drank water three days ago. im several steps ahead of the enemy. this is what it takes to win

The beast wailed at me until I was forced to caress it.

kitten fever is worse than baby fever because a kitten is way easier to obtain than a baby so it's more dangerous

you cant obtain me. tiger stance

the idea that every summer will be as hot if not hotter than this for the rest of my life is unbearable i need to (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health) murder an oil executive

in fucking Tears thinking about how disgusting a baby griffin would look

its really darkly funny that so many public figures keep dying "of cardiac complications after a brief illness" like wow y'all are Never ever going to say the word COVID huh.

i do think the negative interpretations of "im probably nonbinary but i have a job right now" are kind of reaching. it's obviously a waste of time to theorize the op's intended meaning, so instead i think it's better to recognize how the phrase can be a useful framing device to criticize how much of a fucking hassle it is to get gendered correctly. "but i have a job" e.g. will face discrimination that could threaten livelihood; e.g. don't have the mental bandwidth to explain gender to others; e.g. don't have the time and energy for the soul-searching necessary to confirm. all three of these are labor issues. yes you could interpret it as "but being nonbinary isn't important enough to worry about", despite that being a blatantly bad-faith read. it's more useful to interpret it as "but being publicly nonbinary requires a lot of social effort that, in many cultural contexts, will create more problems that you can't afford to deal with". like cmon it's a really good jumping off point for productive conversations about queer labor rights

Well, are you?. We’re waiting.

There’s a lot to be umami about these days.

discovered that wordle is a fantastic way to forget every single word in the entire english language and awaken the part of your brain that still remembers being a primordial amoeba