Social Hermit

my most toxic trait is i fucking love work gossip. i play neutral not to be the bigger person or take the high road but to hear slander and hearsay from every side. two coworkers complained about each other to me in the same afternoon and i nearly blacked out from the rush

peeling those sour rainbow gummy strips into long thin strings and putting them into cheap energy drink to create something im calling battery acid spaghetti will update once ive finished it

dont do this

it forms a dry skin at the top made of the sour pellets. not a great start.

tastes really good actually. i also feel like i am about to explode.

do not do this.

Rip to y'all, but I'm built different. Trying this tonight

Oh that is a... fascinating smell

Don't do this

Alright now I’m curious

Don't do this

World Heritage Post

just saw a deactivated mutual's post on my dash. that's my dead wife's corpse you're all dragging around

I also reblog this guys dead wife.

noncon friendship

Coworkers

(bravely) I think body parts should only hurt if something is wrong.

I will always take the cat's side. "she's drooling on me" you're so lucky "he always wants to be petted" then pet him "he's mad I won't let him on my desk" make room on your desk for him. I am your cat's defense lawyer and the cat is always innocent on the grounds of them being A Little Kitty Cat.

accidentally said "invasive thoughts" instead of "intrusive thoughts" today and actually I think I'm onto something. this thought does not belong here and it is harming the local ecosystem

not yet.

Someone in a half scale plane has the chance to do something moderately funny.

on 4.5/5.5, american flags fly at three-quarters mast

this accuracy of this bit fucking bodied me as someone who is/has been both.