aspiring evil genius

Who needs a wool bed when you have a sheep

Sudoku on the train home

🐄

[video description: a video by thegentlebarn. it starts with a clip of people grooming a cow's snout with the caption, "5 signs a cow is truly ✨ happy ✨." each of the captions describing the signs is accompanied by clips of cows exhibiting them. they are:

"1. they expose their belly for tummy rubs as a sign that they trust you 2. they initiate gentle physical contact like licking or hugging you 3. they're chewing cud - this means they feel safe & their digestive system is doing its thing 👍 4. zoomies! just like with dogs, this is most often a playful, happy behavior 5. they make a 'purring' sound - cows do this when they're extremely relaxed and content. it's like a big exhale"

pokemon researchers have had to suss this out on their own over decades, and it's a really unpopular theory, made worse by the fact that no one can come up with a better one. from their perspective pokemon generate spontaneously but in both chronological directions, and the similarities of many pokemon seem to be detived from a conscious and creative understanding of the world--their world, though? what other world could there be?. there are ice cream pokemon and pokeball pokemon and sword pokemon and trash bag pokemon.

there are so many pokemon with both wings and a beak. is this like swords? is there an ur-flying type that this class evokes? there are so many canine pokemon. but what is a canine? is there such a thing? there's only one set of sword pokemon, right. one tea-set line. is *feline* a coherent category? would the ur-feline have two legs or four? why do so many pokemon have humanlike bodyplans-- but then again, why so few?

pichu has always been the prior form of pikachu. why didn't it get counted in order? why do we call it that instead of saying pikachu is the middle evolution of the pichu line? why can so many trainers remember finding this out well into their journeys? why didn't ash start with one?

-is there any meaningful correlation between type and likelihood of a humanoid evolution

-why are pokemon more likely to evolve towards a bipedal bauplan than away from one

-if pokemon dont have genitalia why is it that the more closely they resemble adult human proportions the more likely they are to have mock-clothes over where their genitals aren't

-when a pokegenesis occurs (the entry point of a new pokemon into the universe's timeline) (you have to think of it as an entry point because once it happens it goes backwards into the past as well as forwards into the future) do all the new instances of the individual pokemon arrive as a big lot of eggs, and spread out from there, or as the ages and in the positions they would have been if they had always been there, because now they've always been there

-why isn't there a bicycle-shaped pokemon yet?

-do we categorize pokemon by self identification (the cat pokemon know they're cats) or by similarity of build and ability (fish pokemon)

-are the indefinitely young trainers in chronostasis (their age has been fixed to a certain unmoving point OR unmoored from the forward flow of time) or are they just experiencing periodic chronoregression (they loop a very short period of aging OR are reset to a pre-event age) by their entanglement with multiple pokegenesis events

-is exposing prepubescent children to significant chronological aberrations ethical even if they really want to

-how do you stop a ten year old with a dragon from doing anything they want to do

it puffs up its throat sac and curls its tail up and *runs along on all four legs*, you know, exactly like a real bicycle.

A lot of home org advice fully misses this aspect. Kondo not only acknowledges it, but leans into it. And ultimately this helps motivste me to keep my space tidy - it's really hard to me to keep on the nebulous goal of self-care, but much easier to get up and put things away if I envision my salt and pepper grinders as like, retail workers who are now standing in an empty shop (my dining table) and just wanna go home (the spice rack where they live).

Normie tidying process: that heater should be put away for summer! I mean, I'm not gonna need it

Me: well it's just chilling and also I can't be arsed.

Kondo: that heater has done a good job keeping you warm over winter and now it should get to go have a rest in the cupboard

In honor of this occasion, please enjoy some silly polar bears

Surprise!