Welp

Show up at work like hi boss sorry I'm late my I was helping my mother track down one specific 90s dungeon crawler for the purposes of obtaining a muffin recipe the developer hid in the files

I'M MAKING THE MUFFINS

Taste review: Make the video game muffins oh my GOD.

shout out to the sound designer who was like "I know exactly what kind of music to whip out for this one!"

I've never actually seen this before, and WOW is that cool!

Wha-

#dear god ive made it to dullahan tumblr

could u imagine if ppl talked about catholicism the same way they talked about like… indigenous ppl’s religions….

I love the fact that this is insinuating that jesus is going to try to kill these kids

my liege you cannot trust this buffoon. he doesn’t even begin every other sentence with “my liege.” he‘ll never whisper in your ear the way i do it, my liege. sire. your fuckableness

I always thought the name wormtongue was derogatory but I clearly misunderstood their dynamic

i know i made the original post but come on man

you can’t talk about vampires and their views on menstrual blood anywhere else besides here. On account of the stigma

stigma fangs in your pussy. LOL

you mispronounce miette?? you butcher miette name????

traumatized fictional man with dubious morals I'd like to fuck

i am tired of people tagging this with weak shit like "uwu i wouldnt fuck him but i would hold his hand maybe" no fuck off this post is for horny bitches only

Makes sense. I mean, a passenger of a cruise line isn't called a sailor, right? Astronaut literally means "star sailor."

Huge oversight on my part you're absolutely right

never let anyone tell you that trawling through mediocre victorian poetry isn't worth it. we just happened upon an absolute BANGER of a worm poem. go read it or else 🪱🪱🪱

Holy fucking shit this is one of the most incredible things I have ever read. I am dead serious. I PROMISE you that you want to read this, and you're going to immediately send it to all your weird friends who you also know will love it.

One thing most people don't realize about Gazebos is how bloodthirsty they used to be until the 1930s or so. It used to be that in order to appease your average small town gazebo you had to feed it 4-5 marching bands a year, or roughly 2 dozen barbershop groups. Noaways? Throw it a steely dan cover act every 6 months, maybe a bridal party every few years if you're actively trying to court its favor, and you're pretty much in the clear. And the crazy thing is nobody knows why they calmed down, or that their appetite for flesh won't return to its 19th century heights one day. It's actually an increasingly popular theory among modern Gazebo researchers that we're at the tail end of a period of dormancy and it's only a matter of time until they start howling for blood again. And if/when that does happen there's the question of whether our modern zeeb-keepers are really ready for the task of booking enough sacrificial acts to meet that increased demand. Guild policy has gotten lax in the century since the heyday of Dark Pavillionism and a lot of local keepers refuse to even look at newer research that threatened to upsettheir status quo. Kind of scary to think about

Most modern research indicates an overpopulation correction. Notice how rare gazebos have become since the 1930s. Aside from a little bump in the 1960s, data indicates overall gazebo numbers have been on the decline for the last few generations. This has allowed their preferred diet to repopulate; see the increase in bands with banjos and tubas since 1994. With the population explosion of stomp-clap suspenders-wearing large bands and “bluegrass” music threatening to overwhelm their own feeding grounds, we are clearly ripe for a gazebo resurgence. However, since their overall population has declined so drastically, it remains to be seen if they can rise to their previous spot in the food chain or if the surviving pool can’t breed sufficiently to match the food source

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

I am in love with you /p

What about the one with the princess locked in a tower learning to become a wizard? That’s lived in my mind for years and I haven’t seen it in a long time

Oh, love that story, adding it to the list: 20. Princess Talia and adding a few more contenders 21. Thyme 22. The Monster under the Bed 23. A Meaningful Death 24. Humans are unstoppable…until they aren’t 25. The Monster under the Fridge 26. Antler Guy 27. Cleric slamming healing spells

Adding a few more I remembered:  28. The Frog and the Scorpion 29. HSTHETE 30. The First Witch in the World 31. Imagine that Oceans were replaced by Forests  32. A Faerie taking a Name  33. The Dragon on the Farm  34. Synovus & Menace  35. Raising the Anti-Christ  36. Aliens vs. Flora & Fauna of Earth (pretty sure there are even more additions to the original post but I had this one saved)  37. Doctors without Borders…in Space!  38. The Villain-Wrangler  39. The Last Contact  40. The 100 Parent-Point Children  41. And the Heavens Wept  42. The Night Gentleman  43. The Serpent God and their Priestess 

44. No One Showed Up for the Last Storytime

Wow! @writing-prompt-s contributing to like half of these!

I can hardly take any credit for these stories! But I love sharing them. Unfortunately I cannot read all the prompt responses so please tag me if you want me to reblog a story that resonated with you so I can give it a little boost :)