stop getting offended

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and

you might be entitled to financial compensation if he or a loved one dies

I read the other day that boys who are very close and affectionate with their mum’s below the age of 12 are actually less likely to have mental health issues as teenagers because they feel more comfortable actually expressing their worries and feelings instead of repressing them and acting like they’re made of stone.

dark google, show me racist dogs

everyone says peanut butter is made of peanuts but have you ever seen peanuts be made into it??

feel the same about arizona ice tea. arizona’s still there so what the fuck

If you die while making food in a slow cooker, whoever finds your body will have a nice warm meal waiting for them.

They can also eat whatever is in the slow cooker too

listen. it’s 2018. it’s time to admit, finally, that bbc sherlock is, in fact, bad, and was only good because we watched it when we were 15 and didn’t know how to dismantle scripts that SOUND clever but are really just gold-flake covered shit

*angry and annoyed asexual agreement*

what’s this mean

It means they agreed but weren’t like, horny about it i guess

not to be edgy but i unironically enjoy some things

Now this is a hamless prank.

OMFg IM KATHY

“We’re trying for a baby” is the only socially acceptable way of saying you’re dropping as much semen into your significant other as humanly possible

Polite way of telling her parents ur cream pie-ing her every day

*tips fedora at mosquito* m’laria