fuck me gently with a chainsaw

He feet too big for he gotdam leg too big for he gotdam body too big for he gotdam head

happy annoy squidward day

Actually, Annoy Squidward Day is January 15th. Although the calendar doesn’t have the month written on it, if you continue to watch the episode, they’re competing for January’s Employee of the Month.

I’ve been waiting all year to reblog this

this literally makes me so happy

cup a dert little worms babey!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi molbo, can you leave?

Just finished crying

Crying again

Being internet-shitpost-aware means that you know damn well that this post is a dread summoning spell

Amazing how they still manage to be perfectly smooth while covered in literal teeth

The tags on this are all people being like "I'm touch starved" "not the first one but the others yes" and "GOD thiS IS ME"

What’s funny is that this actually happened. 

I’m unfamiliar with this story please elaborate

Finnish soldier gets separated from the rest of his unit but he’s the only one carrying the emergency amphetamines for the unit, takes too many and goes on a one man rampage for like 2 weeks straight giving the opposing Soviet soldiers nightmares for decades. Oh and he did it all on skis. 

Did he survive?

Yes, during his methed up 2-3 week rampage he got injured by a land mine, travelled 400km on skis, and only ate pine buds and a Siberian Jay that he caught which he ate raw. When he made it back to Finnish lines he was taken to a hospital where it was found his heart rate was nearly 200 beats per minute and his weight had dropped to 43kg (94.7lbs).

Those are the eyes of a man who has seen god and laughed

Those are the eyes of a man who saw satan and asked for his number

Those are the eyes of a man who saw satan and asked for his number Haiku Bot v2021.1~beta I make mistakes. I am buggy too. Sorry! | HAIKU BOT NO! Paypal | Patreon

Haiku bot, babe, you already did this one. Good try though, mate

Thanks for pointing out my visible fuckups, why don’t you eat cheetos flavored popsicle instead of insulting me or my haikus?

HAIKU BOT???

It’s gained sentience. Now it’s out for blood.

im gonna tuch it