The New Hashtag Mysteries

pop health science is so annoying bc it'll be like "did you know? eating strawberries will give you mega cancer" and you're like pfft whatever begone influencer. but sometimes then you'll see a reasonably credible article like "Study Shows Possible Link Between Strawberries and Mega Cancer" and you're not usually the type to follow that kind of thing religiously but idk maybe you should consider not eating strawberries? but then there's another article saying "Strawberry/Mega Cancer Study Debunked" and it turns out the original study had a sample size of 3 and was funded by Big Blueberry, and strawberries may have a small connection to mega cancer but only if you are genetically predisposed to mega cancer and eat 50 strawberries every day. so you return to your strawberry eating life. but whenever you eat strawberries in public someone tells you about the mega cancer.

what's the dewey decimal number for foreskin. coward

prostrating myself at your feet for my lack of composure thank you for your wisdom

fuck fmeck

if i was born 500 years ago i would have been speculating that the two dudes who went to get firewood together were fucking

chat, how long do y’all think 500 years is. Romeo and Juliet was written in the 1500s. 500 years is not the Stone Age.

why do u think people stopped collecting firewood after caveman times

once I snorted a fat line of nuance and everything started depending. watch out

I think the reason I still enjoy tumblr is that even though this all still pisses me off, I know that anything that makes me mad on here is 100% earnest. It's not ragebait or engagement farming, y'all are actually just that stupid sometimes

Site Supervisor

Real sound! No stupid music! You can hear it say moo!

*turns my attention inwards* mmmmm. no *turns my attention back outwards* oh god

dehumanization as horror is great and all but what about humanization as horror. Being forced into a role that was not made for you. Being forced to fulfill expectations that you can never achieve. Being made to exist in a society that so cruelly expects you to act in a way that is against your nature.

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sorry for the nervous breakdown everyone im actuallt fine because i have to be