Me? Gongaga

Fuuuuck dude I got drunk last night and tried to take down the villain on my own and now he’s texting me some ‘I’m the only one allowed to defeat you’ shit bro what do I do

Man he just yelled ‘I want him alive’ to his goons, it’s so over.

this kid at the grocery store crying like bluey got shot

I’ve decided that my 20s are actually age 25 - 35

I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna do the dishes!

I did it! It sucked but I did it!

Being an adult in this recession and being like wow I am totally "splurging" on 3 new sets of cotton underwear and 3 pairs of socks like whoaaaaa hold your horses duke of the land where's all this money gonna come from

this is not my beautiful circus..these are not my beautiful monkeys

And you may find yourself crammed into a very small automobile...

Jerry, they're implying Scots is a dialect of English, Jerry

*Kramer bursting through the door* guess who's been vandalizing Scots wikipedia for years fellas

Sometimes I feel like a creepy creeper for dming mutuals I’ve never talked to before I could be like hey what’s up and in my head im like omg im creepy and a #creeper

However this is how you make friendships that will last you years so you must do it #creep #creeper

Hey it’s me creep creeperington I noticed you like hannibal and also have heard music before and have seen 3 movies and,