╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

sorry to anyone who followed me for anything. you're not getting that

"Hey there pepperhead, legal isn't super exited about this tweet"

finger sucking is super hot if you don't think about the statistics for not washing hands...

this one is for all my babygirls. i see your comments ladies, and they make me smile. im lurking and im stalking when you least expect it but lately i've just been taking care of my business and getting my grind on. but i promise you i will get back to play and get my flirt on.

has anyone considered that it was probably her house too. where else was she supposed to put her chintz?

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

Shitty things about being isekaied #34; every time I use the restroom I automatically reach for my phone I left in my jacket pocket back on earth, and my hand goes exactly where I keep my knives on my belt, so I always walk out of the john with a fresh hand wound

Shitty things about being isekaied #49: dog came with me but the magic field uplifted her into an anime girl and I'm realizing our personalities just don't click (plus her sitting on my lap is weird now)

Shitty things about being isekaied #64: the town blacksmith is an elf named Gay Simpson and I couldnt explain why that made me laugh and now she won't fix my weapons anymore

Shitty things about being isekaied #75: my degree in russian lit is useless now

Shitty things about being isekaied #83: the four dark lords of this world look almost identical to abba which cant be intentional but when they line up on horseback its so uncanny i cant help but wonder if someones fucking with me

Shitty things about being isekaied #94: they dont make my meds here and health potions dont do shit for bipolar

“This kink is problematic when you think about it” ohhhhhh shit ok lemme head on over to the kink store and trade these kinks in for one that make my jackoff fantasies morally superior

I feel like pirating media that isn’t sold or offered anywhere legally anymore shouldn’t be called piracy. Girl thats archaeology

"my family didn't splatter my head against the concrete with a big big hammer when i was a baby !!!!(!+!!+!!!!! i owe them soooooo muchb!!!;!! they didn't lock me in a dungeon and starve me to death I owe them soooio mich for their kindness!!!!! they taught me how to annoy them less!!!! i can never repay theur unlimited love!!!!"

Everything used to be 20 dollars and now that I finally have 20 dollars everything is now 200 dollars

horror movie showing a child’s drawing of the monster or ghost or whatever but instead of a little kid and crayons they’re like a preteen and it’s manga style