the pain stays hard but i stay harder #boner

This is so American I could CRY

staring at the dessert menu and twirling my hair and going "should I be baaaaddd" until the autistic girl I'm eating with says "there is nothing bad about eating dessert. it is a morally neutral action"

im so hungry i could eat a amazing food and refreshing drink

working with kids and one of them says “you know you eat 8 spiders a night on average right?” and another goes “no no no those statistics are actually skewed by people who like eat spiders recreationally for fun and stuff” and my head snapped up like a fucking sleeper agent

doctors hate her! This woman is experiencing symptoms that might point to a health problem and wants doctors to do something about it

her name is pinky pony and she loves to go on a party. so get that through your thick fucking skull

passing in public makes me feel like white shrek