fop it like it's hot

the procrastinator’s mind will invent distractions you’ve never conceived of in order to avoid tasks even a dog could do.

full offense but none of you would have ever survived fanfiction.net in 2009

remember when writers had to be all like: “omg omg lemon starts HERE” y’all are lucky that ao3 has tags and filters you can set

god those were lawless times. 

Being ugly is not an excuse. Most people are ugly. I’ve fucked ugly people and they weren’t virgins. They were whores. All things considered there probably is someone 5 minutes away dying to fuck you.

not an excuse for what

for not voting

im joining the war on gross disgusting pornographic content on the side of gross disgusting pornographic content

[id: illustration of a tabby cat riding a flying carpet toward where the birds are flying]/end id.

Me when I fucking get you

send his ass to gongaga

i prefer divorce and cheating to putting characters that make no sense together in a polycule tbh

the thing about queer tv is that every time someone says "why isn't there a queer show where XYZ happens" the reality is that 1) there is actually a queer show where XYZ happens, and 2) that show is almost always either a thai drama or black sails

not all ships are For wanting them to be in a happy healthy relationship together. sometimes shipping two characters means you want them to be erotically obsessed with each other and become entwined in a mutually toxic love affair for a few months and then horrifically break each other's hearts and never speak again. sometimes you want them to be codependent best friends with enough repression to explode a submarine who only make out/have sex when they're at their worst. sometimes you want them to pine after each other for years, never say anything, and then die. sometimes you want them to kill each other. this, too, is shipping

"the new pope is problematic" well folks it's the catholic fucking church so im not really sure where your hopes were at