close enough
"I said my cryptic line. And then I leave. That's how this works-"
God I love Jason
DEAR READER

oozey mess

JVL
🪼
$LAYYYTER
dirt enthusiast

Kaledo Art

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

Janaina Medeiros
trying on a metaphor

Discoholic 🪩

PR's Tumblrdome
Stranger Things

#extradirty
todays bird

RMH
Monterey Bay Aquarium
tumblr dot com
Jules of Nature

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@raimagnolia
close enough
"I said my cryptic line. And then I leave. That's how this works-"
God I love Jason

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are non brits aware of count binface.
to give some entirely bizarre context, nigel farage (extreme cunt) has stepped down from his position as MP for clacton (due to a scandal where he received £5 million from a crypto billionaire that could have been laundered) only to run again so that he can prove people like him. and the only person running against him is count binface. who has been a staple of british politics for many years. and now the british press is forced to interview him seriously while he sits there with his binface.
For context Farage can't be prosecuted for this while not in office. His tactic is to be re-elected to show he is a man of the people beating all other parties (and therefore laws don't apply??). Other parties have chosen not to run ostensibly because it lends legitimacy to his stunt but more likely because it is a Reform stronghold and they are unlikely to challenge him anyway.
Except in the hour of need, a binface stepped up.
So either he gets in and is prosecuted, or he loses to a bin.
941.086
british history since 2000
@your-dewey-decimal-number-is do we have a number for bins?
628.4
waste management and disposal (re: garbage cans/bins)
i don't really want to weight in on the "using big words in your writing is ableist" discourse happening on tiktok because i'm like 90% certain it's an anti-intellectual psyop to stir up drama in online circles to promote the use of ai to summarize literally everything and thus feeding the LLMs and lowering the populace's mistrust of such tools but i also have to say: dictionaries and thesauruses are the most accessible they've ever been. if you use an e-reader of any kind you can look up a word without leaving the page. there's a plethora of online dictionaries and if you just type a word + "meaning" into google it'll usually give you a definition. we used to have pocket dictionaries we used when reading in class. i have two on my shelf right now that i used in high school. stop letting the fascists purposefully misuse anti-ableism rhetoric to trick you into never thinking again.
Remember when Xbox was going to basically ban used games for the xbox one, and Playstation made fun of them with that video titled "how to share games on Playstation" and it was just one guy handing another a game disk? And now Playstation is getting rid of physical disks entirely

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Please enjoy the infectious laughter of the Australian senate struggling to keep its composure while grilling a man about bee semen
Regularly forget we posted this and then are hit like a brick with notifications like this one
???
Grace does something nice and Simon thanks him
[DO NOT REPOST]
[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat. Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records. My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now. Called the county clerk. Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty. Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons? Me: Yes, but he's a cat. Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county? Me: He's a legal cat. Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption. Me: He can't file anything. He has paws. Clerk: You can file on his behalf. Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat." Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons." Me: What's the medical reason? Clerk: He's a cat. Me: That's not a medical condition. Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving. Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later. "Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement." Took the letter to my vet. Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty. Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty? Me: Excellent question. No good answer. Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten. Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve? Vet: On what grounds? Me: He's a cat. Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings." Me: Perfect. Sent it in. Got another rejection. "Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court." My roommate thought this was hilarious. Roommate: Felix is going to jail. Me: This is serious. Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens. Decided that was actually the only option left. Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters. Checked in at the courthouse. Clerk: Name? Me: Felix Martinez. Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix? Me: Yes. Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat. Me: I've been saying that for six weeks. Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption? Me: I filed three. All rejected. Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation? Me: Twice. Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this. Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me. Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote? Me: You tell me. Supervisor: This is a data error. Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out. They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience. Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry. Me: Appreciate it. Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted? Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats. Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card. For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was. Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud. Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent. Roommate: That's what they all say. Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now. Fitting end to his legal career. end id]
@f-a-b-l-e
@the-paisley , this is the Does with Boots
A wonderful tale!
Much applause!!

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Tumblr has deleted all of my accounts.
Everything I spent years building is gone, and we have been forced back to zero.
My mother is still fighting for her life and urgently needs after surgery treatment.
My mother is fighting for her life in the ICU, and because of the ban, we lost our reach. We are down to the last 6 hours to secure her medications and still need $265 to save her.
We just need 11 people to donate $25 right now. Please donate or REBLOG this immediately time is literally running out!
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you can call thorki incest (it is) you can call thorki toxic (sometimes) but one thing you can’t say is that they don’t have chemistry
Amen
Happy New Year
(After-party mood.)

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Simon just wants to eat in peace man.
I finished reading a fic called The Patron Saints of One Way Trips! such a fun read hehehd
There's actually a lot of scenes that really stuck to me but I was in the mood for drawing Grace geeking out about Simon
Don't be mean, Simon. Ellie is an angel :(