Yeehaw

*you hit the talk button again* "Perhaps I should remain as a cisgender ally, for cis men have such privilege that could be used to protect the vulnerable, and voices that can be heard when transfems are ignored..."

*you hit the talk button again* "Perhaps I should transition as well! No truer help than bolstering one's ranks, haha!"

*you hit the talk button again* "But then again, regardless of my feelings on the matter, that would deprive the trans community of an ally in my position, which could be dire..."

susie deltarune

The gag anime:

you've probably already noticed that turn signals ("blinkahs") don't serve their usual function here - a common saying on the server is that using them as intended is just giving information to your enemies. you may be tempted to conclude that these "blinkahs" are useless. not so! they are exclusively used for parrying cars audacious enough to think they can just drive past you. the timing is a five-frame window beginning when you can first see the approaching car in your sideview mirrors. simply engage your blinkah and then immediately jump out in front of your opponent. if you get the timing right, you will build super meter. if you're too early, you've accidentally performed a safe traffic maneuver, resetting your meter to 0. if you're too late, you crash and may have to transition to direct PvP, which is outside the purview of this guide.

yellow lights can also be parried by running them, with the amount of super gained determined by how far you make it through the intersection before the light turns red. the ideal window you're aiming for here is between your front and back wheels crossing the white line

you can use your super meter to cast a variety of spells to hinder your opponents. popular meter-efficient spells include mainstays such as "Summon Double-Parked Uber Eats Driver", "Line-Skipping Merge", and "Greater Unmarked Cop". if you max out your meter, you can cast the legendary "Power Word: Storrow".

the super meter system works differently for bikes. obviously, since they lack blinkahs and run red lights anyways, they can't build super in any of the normal ways. instead, they build it up passively, since their very existence enrages every driver around them. to offset this, the spell list for bikes is a lot lower-power than the spell list for cars, mostly being focused on mobility or utility instead of offense (although there are some notable exceptions like "U-Lock Missile"). the capstone spell for bikes is, of course, "Post Misleadingly Edited GoPro Footage On Reddit".

Having had your fill of these amenities, you ask your hosts what lands lie nearby. The older catgirl's ears perk up with visible delight, for she has spent most her seventeen-and-seven years of holy service here coming up with this speech.

"Seven days' walk dawnward — perhaps eight, if you lack spirit discipline — begin the Uncountable Pillar Marches, once the edge of the now-defunct Pattern Egg Empire. Its towering pillars of basalt and malachite still stand, though oft askew. Each pillar is home to one of a clangorous and unruly mass of scorpiongirl philosophers, cranegirl god-speakers, and fennecgirl charlatans, all shouting to be heard. Bring wax to seal your ears, offerings of food and coin, and a traveling companion with a strong throwing arm."

"If, instead, you follow the sunset for longer than I'd care to, you'll find storied Attar-in-Mourning. Long ago, its shrikegirl sorcerer-queen plucked out her eye and replaced it with a shard of a slumbering primordial godgirl's sapphire brain. She is thus incomparable in all subtle art, and a monster infinitely worse than the rock lodged in her skull. If you must visit Attar-in-Morning, be sure you travel alongside snakegirls, for the sorcerer-queen is inexplicably fond of them."

"Go at night by the polestar till you reach a river, then follow its waters, and you'll reach the great port-city Chryselephantine. It's been in uproar ever since a catgirl crime syndicate stole of a copy of the Crucible Phoenix Manual. Now all the catgirl mobsters have spirit discipline, gun arts, and ascended forms, and they've overthrown Chryselephantine's royal beasts. It is perhaps mildly more dangerous than its neighbors, though the price of arsenic there is quite modest."

"Now, see that mountain on the horizon? Set out that way, and you'll find yourself in the magmatic demesne of the Girl-Eating Pantokrator, who knows the ways of death-without-action." Here, the older monk frowns, and departs from her script. "Please direct any questions about her name to my companion." The younger catgirl stifles a laugh, having mastered the art of doing so in the months since the elder monk last gave this speech.

"And to the beith, there are the Aerial Ziggurats, five-times-five-thousand." (all catgirls know what beith is). "Before the seas were salt, the ziggurats were flying palaces and world-smiting warships. Now they are tombs, and like all tombs, they draw scavengers. Vulturegirls and scarabgirls and opossumgirls steal away into the ruins in search of forbidden secrets and long-forgotten wonders. A wretched lot, they, and best avoided."

she doesn't even know Seth's name at this point, and she's bragging on them to strangers because they're friends