Find Your Fun

But plans and people can change. Here's hoping to a year of happier memories!

After losing an entire day, you’d think that we would have made some kind of attempt to rush out and see every sight available to us. Believe us, we did try. But jet lag is (apparently) a VERY REAL thing that is AWFUL and that will RUIN YOUR ENTIRE DAY. 

Cue us waking up confused almost every day at 1:00 p.m.

Here’s the highlight reel of what we did experience, which for being brain depleted zombies I think is actually quite a lot:

1. Trier

We stayed with Catlynn in the little village of Knopp, about an hour away from Frankfurt, and an hour away from Trier. According to Wikipedia, Trier was a Roman city, ruling site of Constantinople and still holds many Roman artifacts today. One of the most impressive things to see is the Porta Nigra, an ancient city gate that still stands. It was honestly really beautiful and impressive standing after so many years. The gate was originally made of sandstone that was fastened together with large iron clamps, but the iron was pillaged in Medieval Times.

One of the most memorable paces we visited was the Trier Basilica. The oldest section was built by Constantine in 1180, and construction wasn’t declared finished on the whole building until 1207. I’m not necessarily a religious person, but as someone who grew up surrounded by Catholic friends, I am very familiar with Catholic churches. None I have seen before compared to the Cathedral in Trier. Located in the city square, there is a constant hustle and bustle surrounding the church. All of that immediately melts away as you step inside, surrounded by the sweet smell of incense and blanketed in the velvety quiet of people praying, or admiring the architecture. Pictures cannot do the immensity of the structure justice. I feel like it would be an honor to attend mass in such an ancient place. 

 It felt intrusive and gauche to take pictures in such a revered space, so I don’t have very many shots of the church. But if you look it up online there are several professional photos that show off it’s beauty. 

If you’d like more in depth information about Trier, here is a great overview of some important landmarks. We passed by several of these on our trip, but were too uncultured to fully recognize and appreciate them at the time: https://www.thecrazytourist.com/15-best-things-trier-germany/

2.  Triberg 

My heart actually breaks a little bit when I think of Triberg. It was a 3 hour drive to get there. We were fool hardy and did no think of some very important factors before we made the trip: 1) Everything closes at 5:00 p.m. in Germany on Sundays and 2) It was going to be dark soon after we arrived. 

My ONE GOAL for the entire trip was to see the Black Forest and eat some Black Forest cake. Mostly because the combination of doing those things simultaneously seemed really funny to me, and also because I genuinely just love forests and cakes. It was a no brain-er. 

The drive up was stunningly beautiful. Think small historic villages nestled among sun dappled fields of the Swiss Alps. I could hardly believe the postcard we seemed to be living in. Once we arrived, we stopped for food, an endeavor that took approximately 2 to 3 hours to accomplish, but which was absolutely worthwhile in hindsight. The name of the restaurant was entirely unpronounceable to any of us, so I can’t even begin to guess where we went. What I will say is that that restaurant had some of the best food I’d ever eaten in my life. I got a simple pasta with ham and peas, accompanied by a warm mug of black tea. It was snowing outside and ducks were fighting on the lake as we sat nestled inside against the cold. 

By the time we finished, our trek out to Germany’s tallest waterfalls had to be cancelled, as it was officially dark-thirty and the visiting center was closed. I saw the black forest all around me, its furry boughs thick with snow. I did not eat any cake, and sleepy and amused by our lack of success, we drove the three hours back home. 

3. Heidelberg

While I enjoyed almost every place we visited in Germany, I would have to say Heidelberg really stuck out to me. It was our final day to be there and we visited with little knowledge of where Catlynn was taking us for the day. 

Heidelberg is a very interesting place, a university town cut through with the Neckar River and absolutely oozing historic charm. We only spent a few hours trekking through its cobbled hills, and I wish more than anything we could have spent more time exploring this place. 

On the agenda for the day, a visit to Heidelberg Castle, a relic from the 13th century. This had to be one of the best parts of the entire trip for me. It was overwhelming in the best way to see such a giant structure looming closer with every step up the hill. We went at the perfect time of day, the sun was setting and there was no one else around. Our trio was alone as we watched the sun set over the river and marveled at the history we were standing on (and also complaining about the bitter wind). 

I feel so insanely fortunate to have been able to visit Catlynn and experience such amazing things. I would love to go back one day and explore more of the country with more time on our hands. Maybe then jet lag wouldn’t have been such an ass kicker. 

Here’s hoping to many more adventures as the year continues!

Well folks, we did it! 

Dark and early on a Wednesday in February, my boyfriend and I made our way to the airport. Our flight was scheduled to leave around 8:00 a.m. so we arrived right around 6:00. After a painless check-in and zip through security, we made our way to the gate. On the way we were treated to an ear piercing siren as the fire alarms went off. Bright strobes flashed in our tired eyes and metal grates lowered from the ceiling, closing us into the building. It was a confusing time, not to mention a total wake up call! Security lazily informed us not to worry, that it was a drill and that there was no real danger. Fortunately, they were correct. After a few uncomfortably loud minutes, we made it to our gate, only to be informed that our flight was delayed due to the intense fog that shrouded the building. Cue us hanging out for 4 hours, waiting for the weather to clear. Fortunately we had a long layover scheduled for the connecting flight, but I felt bad for the people with stricter schedules. After a lot of people watching and speculating about what Germany would actually be like, it was time for us to head out. 

One (very, very rough) plane ride later we landed in New York. I’d never seen my boyfriend look so green around the gills! The last time he flew was as a kid, so he wasn’t thrilled with the prospect of getting on another plane after what we just experienced. 

Landing in New York was intense and confusing. We had to ride a train around the airport (I am not kidding!) and go through security two separate times before making it our gate. The way they handled security was interesting. There were two separate lines that eventually merged together into a clump of people at the front. We were each paired off with a random person in line, who was our “security buddy”. We were to stay with them the entire time until we finished the process. My “buddy” was a beautiful Belgian skyscraper named Jan. He was in town for the Micheal Kors fashion show, and was delighted to hear we were going to Germany because he had just traveled there the week before. (If this was a Lifetime movie, my life would have taken a very different direction at this point.) One of my favorite things about traveling is the little connections we make with people along the way. Jan was friendly, and it made me kind of sad when we parted ways because I knew I would never see him again in my life. I hope he made it safely back home. 

Our flight to Germany was through Singapore Airlines, and it was 100% the most amazing flight experience I’ve ever had in my life. I’m not exaggerating when I say that everyone who worked on that flight: the pilots, airline stewards and stewardesses - were some of the most beautiful people I have ever seen. The men were dressed in crisp blue uniforms, and the women were dressed in beautiful patterned dresses. Each seat had a television embedded in the seat in front, and the airline stewards went around passing out hot towels to everyone as we climbed aboard. Classical music was piped in through speakers around the plane and the in-flight safety video featured beautiful cinematography of famous Singaporean landmarks. I’ve never been so relaxed when told what to do in the event of a crash water landing. 

After a serene nine hour flight where neither Alex or I slept, we landed in Germany and presumably found our way through customs, passports, and the airport where we were picked up by our friend Catlynn. 

Do I remember any of this? No. Do I remember getting to her house? Nope. The entire first day in Germany is entirely lost to me thanks to a 7 hour time zone difference and complete lack of sleep. I think by that point we had been up for over 24 hours and our brains were turning into mashed potato. 

This past Saturday, I made the 3 minute trek over to my sister’s place. She made us pancakes and we picked out paint samples for her new living room furniture and she taught me how to crochet.

Crochet has always sort of ... been around in my life. My grandpa was insanely talented at many things, and crochet was one of them. I believe he learned when he was about 14 years old, spending time at a polio recovery center. He taught my mom (who is also insanely talented at many things) who then went on to teach my sister. Out of all of us, she’s the one who really took to it. She makes gorgeous blankets (I have two from her, one a beautiful rainbow wave I got as a birthday present many years ago that is one of my favorite blankets ever, the other a sophisticated weave of muted purples, given as this year’s Christmas present.) She also makes scarves and hats; just this week she finished up a project and donated about 25 baby hats to our local preemie NIC Unit. They were so small it was hard to believe anyone would ever fit into them!

When I was younger my mom tried to teach me how to crochet but I didn’t have the patience for it. I wasn’t good at it and got frustrated easily, too distracted by the thought of running around outside to really sit still and pay attention. That was my last attempt --  a failed one. 

This time was different. My sister was incredibly patient with me and it was with easy laughter that she corrected my (many) mistakes. She explained all the different hook sizes, yarn thickness, pattern types. And then she taught me how to yarn on, chain and make single, double, double half and treble stitches. It was ... a lot to remember. I wasn’t good at it by any means, but honestly it was just so fun to try something new and kind of figure out the pattern of things as I went along. She gave me a couple of balls of yarn to practice on: one for chaining and one to continue to crochet single and double stitches. Hopefully with enough practice I can start making neat rows soon!

So it happened! My boyfriend and I took the time to give ice skating a shot.

I have to admit, it was MUCH more difficult than I’d anticipated! The rink we went to had an event happening around the time we showed up, so there were about 30 children and their families scattered around on the ice, screaming and wobbling all over the place. It made things a little more challenging as we did our best not to run into them or make them fall over!

I (wrongly) assumed that because I was able to roller blade as a kid that those skills would transfer over no problem. Whoo boy was I in for a surprise. My ankles did their best to support me as I dragged my way around the rink, mostly sticking to the wall and doing my best to avoid errant kids. My boyfriend fared much better and managed to mostly glide along beside me, happy as a clam. He said several times, “This is so fun! We should do this again!” as I sweated through my scarf and watched a teenager perform a flawless leap and twirl into the air.

They say that ice is slippery, but those words never really translated into my brain. I have a new found respect for anyone who can so much as push themselves forward on the ice without looking like a baby fawn. While I don’t think I’ll be joining the Frozen On Ice troupe any time soon, I would definitely like to go back and have more time to practice when there aren’t so many kids sliding around.

My boyfriend lives in a college town, and on any given weekend there's a ton of things to do. Normally, we already have plans or are too busy out of town to really take advantage of what his hometown has to offer.

Last night was a rare opportunity for us. We didn't have any plans for the night, and a friend let us know that a band was coming to town that would be pretty cool to see. The band was Paranoid Void - a Japanese math rock band. You read that right, a JAPANESE math rock band somehow against all odds found it's way to this tiny corner of the south. It was basically a no brainier that we go.

Now, there's something that you should know about me. I really struggle at concerts. For whatever reason, either the noise or the crush of people or the overwhelming sense of being somewhere new, being at a concert flips some inner switch in me where I start to panic.

But this band was from Japan, my boyfriend was glowing with enthusiasm, and the venue was small enough to where I felt I could give it a shot. After all, my alternative option was sitting home the whole time wishing I had gone to see them.

We arrived at 9:00 and it was still entirely too early. Cue a few hours of us standing around, trying to pass the time in a bar the size of a postage stamp. I really should have clued into the fact that things weren't great for me at this point. Every clank of a beer bottle being thrown away, or the raucus laughter of someone behind the bar made me jump. But I was determined. We came to see Paranoid Void, and that is what I was going to do.

The first band started to play, and it went ... Ok for the most part. Entirely too loud at first, the reverberation of sound in my chest was uncomfortable, and I regretted not bringing earplugs with me. After a few songs my body adjusted and I was able to calm down enough to focus on the music. I stood as far back from the stage as possible, making friends with the bouncer in between songs.

By the time the set was over, I think I'd reached my limit. That's when things really strated to go down hill for me and the panic had really taken root. Logically, my mind was clear and I was entirely aware that I was safe and in a place where no one was trying to harm me. Unfortunately, my body did not get the memo. I trembled, completely losing my ability to calm myself. I texted my boyfriend that I was having trouble and he suggested we step outside. It was freezing and he misattributed my shaking to the cold.

The band that we came to see was going on second, so I made a deal with myself that I would hold it together until their set was through. Unfortunately, I don't make the rules. My boyfriend got lost in the crowd, and I found myself surrounded by a crush of strangers with no cash on my person or anyone to calm me down. It was intense. I called a friend and begged him to come and get me. There was no way to reach my boyfriend in person and ask him for help. I texted him that I was leaving, and that was that. Blessedly, my friend came to get me and I could finally unleash all of the fear and emotion I'd been holding in for the last four hours. Paranoid Void meant nothing in the apathy of my fear, their music acting only as background to my panic.

I feel like last night forced me to come to terms with the fact that I am not a person who will be able to enjoy live music. It's sort of an isolating realization. So many of my peers revere concert experiences and it makes me sad to know that I can't share that feeling with them. I can't be mad at myself though, I gave it my absolute best try, and sometimes just trying something is victory enough.

For those of you who suffer with similar anxieties, here is a list of things I believe may have helped me last night. Maybe this list would be helpful to someone in the future.

1. Trust your instincts. You know your limits, and it's always ok to take care of yourself.

2. Always carry a little extra money on you in case you need an exit strategy. I was lucky enough to have someone in the area who was able to come and get me, but stack the odds in your favor in case you're in an unfamiliar place.

3. Do what you need to do to feel safe. Are sounds overwhelming? Wear earplugs. Are there too many people? Take a step outside, or go to the bathroom. Remove yourself from that space for a moment. Are you past the point of feeling safe? You can always, always, always leave. Always. You have that power, even when you feel totally powerless.

4. Understand that there is absolutely nothing wrong with what you're feeling. If it's fear or anger or euphoria. All of it is valid, and you will be ok.

Three weeks into the new year, and I’ve accomplished one thing on the list!

Bright and early last Saturday morning (I’m talking getting up at 7:00) my mom and I went to a cookie decorating class about an hour away from our house. We were joined by a few of my mom’s friends, as well as several other mother daughter teams including a little girl who has been watching a lot of Junior Baking Championship. She had cool boots and oozed a confidence I could have only dreamed of as a nine year old. 

All of our supplies were set out on long bench tables: pre-baked sugar cookies, multicolored bags of icing (some stiffer icing for “walls” and thinner icing for “flooding”) piping tips, long skewer shaped tools for poking our icing into place, as well as vinyl practice sheets. It smelled incredible. It took all of my self control not to just eat all of the cookies right out the gate. I think everyone there were pretty much beginners, and everyone was super friendly!

We started by practicing, tracing thicker icing onto the vinyl sheets and creating wobbly hearts and circles. I’m not gonna lie, it was surprisingly difficult! It was a weird thing where the icing never quite fell where you expected it to, so curves turned into harsh angles pretty quickly. My mom is incredibly talented in pretty much anything she puts her hands to, so her lines turned out almost perfect on the first try. I couldn’t even really be jealous, I was just really proud of her! 

After practice, our teacher was really confident in us and said we could move on to actually icing our cookies. I was nervous, but you gotta start sometime, right? Maybe because the cookies were 3-D, I found it easier to ice these than our practice sheets. The hardest thing for me was squeezing the icing bags consistently the whole time, but that could totally be because I have the hand strength of a newborn infant. (New Activity Idea: Bulk Up and get Buff Hands?)

I found that icing and flooding the cookies was really relaxing. Flooding is where the thinner icing fills in the whole top part of the cookie. This dries to be the shiny surface you normally see on fancy sugar cookies. We had winter themed cookies, but one of my snow flakes started looking more spider-webby than anticipated so I just rolled with it. 

When it came to lettering our cookies, our teacher had a projector for people to use. I opted to go ahead and free hand my words onto the cookie just for the sake of saving time. There was a line to use the projector! Overall for a first time I don’t think I did too horribly!

Our teacher Mrs. Sarah  was incredibly patient and encouraging throughout the whole thing. It took us two hours from start to finish just to decorate these few cookies, so I’m personally not sure if it’s something I would want to do over and over again any time soon. But who knows, maybe one day I can make snow flakes at Halloween! In any case, I’m really proud of myself for trying something new. It’s what inspired me to start this little “Find Your Fun” project in the first place! I can’t wait to carry this momentum through to the next thing I try!

If you have any activity suggestions, or cookie decorating tips, feel free to let me know!

Until next time!