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@fatzorro
when i was a kid my parents bought me an inflatable doll of the Scream by Edvard Munch (??) that was significantly taller than i was at the time and i used to slow-dance with it and pretend it was my boyfriend. It had its hands attached to its head obviously so it felt like he was always a bit horrified to be forced to dance with me
i didn't need no imaginary friends i had Screaming Joe right here !
I love this website I love it when people tell us what's wrong with them
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They are doing Laura Palmer shit to the Deltarune Christmas Deergirl
me: do you think this train touches the overhead wires normally or do you think she gets freaky with it
train conductor who i've been distracting from my lack of ticket for 35 minutes now: y'know i think she gets freaky with it
Happy birthday Usagi 🌙✨🎂
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"I would never jeopardize the beans" pales in comparison to it's newest successor, "beans r not woke. How could u do this?"
I love how Zohran Mamdani is wearing a suit everywhere. And if he has anything else he puts it ON TOP of the suit. A basketball jersey. A high-vis vest. All worn over the suit. He’s like the mayor character in a cartoon who’s always dressed as The Mayor. If I didn’t know who he was and he biked past me in NYC I’d be like holy shit was that the mayor
Not to bring the serious to a very fun post, but this reaction is exactly what Mamdani is working for with his image, because in a very real way the most effective way for him to be The Mayor is if he looks like The Mayor.
This is a man who is VIOLENTLY aware that when it comes to conservatives, he is a Muslim first, a Brown Man second, an Immigrant third, a Socialist fourth, and a human a very distant fifth, if considered at all. He was also a young adult during the Obama Years and will have seen Republicans rip Obama to shreds for wearing a tan suit instead of a dark one and use literally ANY excuse they could to try and degrade his image.
Despite the fact that a mayor who wears a T-shirt and jeans might "seem more approachable" in the eyes of the average American, Zohran Mamdani knows that someone with his profile fundamentally cannot get away with that the way his White colleagues can. He has instead put in the effort to look professional and BE approachable, because not only does it make it easier for him to reach and represent his constituents, it forces everyone, including both his opponents and establishment Democrats, to engage with the work he is doing instead of judging his image. The fact that he is always seen in a suit and is recognisably The Mayor is, while also something he has fun with, a deliberate choice to ensure he is as inarguably A Professional Politician To Be Taken Seriously. The added humour of e.g. the hi-vis is a bonus, only achievable because he works so hard to Look Like The Mayor.
Adding these tags from @haunted-stranger-garden bc they illustrate this brilliantly
its actually easy to de-enshittify your digital experience all you need to do is install this browser extension and this browser extension and this browser extension and input this custom script into the advanced box and go into your system settings and reconfigure all these options you didnt know existed and change your entire workflow and switch to this alternative operating system and this alternative web browser and this alternative chat client and this alternative word processor and this alternative- sorry that one turned out to be malware delete that one okay now double check your task manager for unwanted background processes and element block these ads and invest in a good VPN and append all your searches with AI blocking keywords and wait a few years until everything you just did becomes shitty too so you can do it all over again okay kitten. its literally that easy.
Ok like. Imagine life without ads. You wake up, check your messages across a variety of apps, no ads. You get up and put on the tv while you prep your breakfast, no ads. Maybe you drive somewhere and switch on the radio, no ads. Maybe you drive a long distance, yet somehow, not a single billboard on your path. You pick up a newspaper or magazine to pass the time, no advertisements only articles. You turn on your game console, the home screen is just about your games, no ads to buy more. You open a streaming app, you don't pay extra for no ads, there's just no ads ever.
Think about how much of your time is spent looking at ads. "Download ublock" yeah I know, I have. But that doesn't change that the world is covered with endless advertising. Imagine never seeing that again. How much better our lives would be.
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Really glad predictive text exists. Should i bring my own parking lot
Mommy needs to be honest kitten. You're not a kitten, you're a puppy, I know. Actually, that's exactly what I wanted to talk to you about. You've let this whole puppygirl thing completely take over our sex life and to be honest it's not really clear to me that you really enjoy it anymore. You really seem stuck in a short-term hedonic spiral from posting about it on tumblr and getting likes. And I know it's hard to get out of that kind of thing but it's really been getting out of control. You said "we're trying for puppies" to my best friend of 15 years. Seriously? How the fuck am I supposed to live that down? No one was laughing. The room was dead silent and I wanted to sink into the floor. And this was days after I was crying my eyes out over the infertility stuff. So you came across as kind of an asshole on top of it. Yeah, I know you didn't mean it like that but you can only point to "bourgeois morality" so many times before it starts to feel like you're just saying "I'm sorry you got offended" you know? Like every time I try to express that some basic social decorum is necessary to preserve relationships I care about you start misquoting Bakunin. And like look you have a lot of positive qualities but I don't think this is working anymore. We both know it hasn't been good for a long time.
What category is your last name?
Son of some guy ("Johnson", "O'Brien", etc)
Job ("Smith", "Miller", etc)
Place/town ("Hill", "del Valle", etc)
Nickname/attribute ("Short", "Goodman", etc)
Hyphenated/multiple of the above
Other (describe in the tags!)
Unsure/results
this reads like disco elysium dialogue
this is something an NPC says to you at a bakery in the witch alps version of disco elysium
also, its sister tweet:
How could you forget:
Had to add this gem
Pouring one out for Poison Junior.
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Hi, im american and i dont really know anything about canada or its politics other then you guys only have one road. But it seem other countries always seem to know allot about american politics. Why is that? Or am i just uncultured
"Only have one road"???
But no, you are absolutely not imagining things- USAmerican media is SUCH a huge export that it saturates global media and makes it difficult to AVOID learning about your political system and your country.
Shows like Law and Order or NCIS, for example, or X-Files to an extent- we've all seen these shows so we've all heard "first amendment rights" or "the declaration of independence" or "Miranda rights". We all know to "call 911" or "contact the FBI" or that we have "the right to remain silent".
But in Canada, for example, we don't have a "declaration" with "amendments". We have The Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms, and if you get arrested here, you are told that "You are being charged with X crime, you have the right to retain and instruct counsel in private without delay, if you cannot afford a lawyer you have the right to contact legal aid for assistance free if charge, you cannot be compelled to speak in answer to the charge but be advised that anything you do say may be used against you in court, confirm if you understand, confirm if you wish to excersise your right to legal aid, do you wish to say anything in answer to the charge".
But in the UK you have to call 999, not 911. In Canada, you have the right to freedom of association, freedom of movement, and freedom of speech, but no "right to bear arms". And in Australia, a cybersex criminals account can be hijacked by law enforcement to track down other predators, and this isn't permitted in Canada OR the USA.
These are just examples, but it spreads further- EVERYONE in Canada knows about Trump and has opinions on your political system, but plenty of teens have no idea who our Prime Minister is.
Hell, *I* watch American news for coverage of global events, but through there I've also picked up on American immigration policy and climate crises.
It's such a huge thing that non-English speaking countries learn English to enjoy English media and read English books and perform international business- and in Canada, we actually have it written in law that a certain percentage of TV and Radio HAS to be Canadian, so that our citizens don't get fully absorbed by American culture and talking points and lose identity and focus on our own country's issues.
It's a big deal, and most USAmericans don't seem to notice.... which is why it seems to sort of get taken for granted that any english-speaking part of the internet is USAmerican.
Even though, you know.
It isn't
