you weren't a dream

The person I reblogged this from deserves to be happy.

Also blogs get hacked or something and send these without the blog owner’s consent. I got this message and then afterwards the person who sent it to me said they didn’t send that.

got a message from a mutual today similar to this and they later messaged me to say it wasn’t them so yeah be careful

I just got a message like this and thought it sounded familiar. Be careful everyone!

Yeah hey followers I do NOT go around randomly sending links, so if you get something like this from me, let me know because I did NOT send it.

yeah i don’t send links without context.

Dearest followers, if something like this happened, DON’T CLICK on the link!!! I won’t send links without context and I want you guys to stay safe!

Every month I reblog this and every month I’m baffled that it’s already the 15th.

I’m scheduling this for every month

IT ONLY APPEARS ON THE FIFTEENTH OF EVRY MONTH

THIS ONLY APPEARS ON 15THS WTF

*slams reblog button*

Welp it’s that day again

Do people just have this queued or something`??

Damn it’s the 15th? What’s next?? The 16th??? Unreal

it’s the 15th again everyone! :D

15TH DECEMBER YEAR’S ENDING FOLKS

Get your pen out

Tell him to buy some extra pens

Get some more environmentally friendly paper

GLITTER PEN FOR MY URL

wear a different perfume when you commit murder fuckin amateurs 

also wear shoes that aren’t your actual size and use gloves if you have to touch anything

what the hell is this here? A how-to-commit-the-perfect-crime??

Wear a wig. Contact lenses . Change your accent . Change Hand when writing . Layer up to make you look big if your small n vice versa . Contour the hell outta your face.

Get your car interior thoroughly washed, then purposely dirty it up again.

Also use an icicle for the weapon because it melts away Buy a ticket to a show and tell as many people / post it on social media that u went to the show

Y'all suspect af😂

*adds 363,462 more people to list of that I will fuck never with*

Make friends with a pig farmer. A full grown nursing sow can eat an entire human body, bones and all, in about 6 hours.

Shit that last one is more helpful than I wanted it to be, I’ll never look at pigs the same

Reblogging for *educational* purposes :)

This post is legendary and I’m so glad I found it. I love all the advice. Except the icicle. That’s technically impossible. Use a disposable knife instead and break the handle.

use a glass knife with wooden handle for ultimate wounding. its gonna leave a severe fucking wound and u can burn the wood and melt down the glass if it doesnt shatter inside the victim.

Thomas what did i tell you about making suspiious posts?

I love learning.

IT’S ON MY DASH I REPEAT IT’S ON MY DASH.

ON MY DASH

Also bury the body deeper than six feet, so it can’t be washed up or smelled by hounds. Yes, that may mean you dig a 12 foot deep grave. Guess what? Murder is work.

Murder is work kids.

Too much work

Creating new jobs in America one murder at a time

Also work fast and no witnesses

THIS HAS OVER A MILLION NOTES WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL!!!!!

Also if you are planning to flee the country, get that figured out way in advance. At least a year or two in advance. And make sure everyone knows you’re moving, so it’s less suspicious than to randomly leave without saying anything. Perhaps it’s studying abroad, a job opportunity, or even meeting up with a friend and/or romantic partner?

If you buey the body vertically don’t forget to leave a few feet above the head and place some animal bones on it so when the blood hounds sniff they will find the animal bones and the police would likely rule it as a false positive. Also globally the solving rate for murder is 45% so don’t worry too much

Don’t forget it’s just a missing person case if they can’t find the body.

Hmm

Dances with plans

Helpful tumblr. Real helpful.

Thank you Tumblr. Now I have ideas :)

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

@yashee-but-jiba youre in the hellsite hall of fame

I love this. If I may add, wear shoes too big/small for your feet so the footprints font give you away.

If you feed a human body to pigs you have to remove the teeth first. Pigs can’t digest human teeth so if suspected the teeth can be found. I would recomend grinding them into dust and releasing it into the wind on a windy day :)

Remember: The authorities will know if the murderer faked their accent/foot print/whatever, but as long as they don’t find your actual features you’ll be fine

No body no murder, hide it well folks.

bury the body, if u left any, under endangered plant species. they can’t legally dig it up then.

also, after burying a body, bury a dead animal horizontally on top of it.

If you’re getting close to kill them, wear a cloak/bedsheet, gloves, anything to shield your body from getting any blood on it. Burn the things you used to shield said blood.

For god’s sake, dissolve the body you guys. Why even risk burying it? Just get yourself some hydrochloric acid (or whatever, a super strong acid or base should work, be careful tho) and dissolve the body and dump it into a nice horrifyingly polluted drain

Everyone on this site is either a mad writer or artist or a full fledged murderer

what do u guys call ur mom

what’s ur sign and what’s the person you’re closest too sign

The thing is once you start thinking about killing yourself you can never go back. It becomes this option, that you can't unsee or stop thinking off. Whenever things get tough again it comes back to haunt you. There'll always be this voice whispering 'wouldn't it all be easier if you died' and you can never get rid of it