WOULD YOU TAKE HIM TO FUNKY TOWN?

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we're not kids anymore.
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occasionally subtle
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@excaliefur
WOULD YOU TAKE HIM TO FUNKY TOWN?

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Hey…. Hey… Characters covered in blood, okay? You remember characters covered in blood?? You used to love characters covered in blood
i don’t know how many people on tumblr know about “verticals” - they’re cheaply made soap operas that are filmed vertically so you can watch them on your phone. they’re infamous in the acting world because of the poor writing and nonsensical plots - almost always has something to do with a mafia boss or a vampire or a werewolf - and they always have insane titles like “pregnant with the ceo’s baby” or “forced to marry the alpha king.” i come across tons of them on casting websites and they all have wild titles and descriptions but none of them, None of Them, have truly grabbed me like the title i saw today:
Dr. Fangs: He Prescribes Bites
answering some questions i’ve seen:
1. yes, real people work on these
2. some of the scripts might be ai generated but a lot of them are poorly translated in to english from other languages (china and russia are really big in to verticals) or just written in like an afternoon by someone with no will to live
3. shockingly you get paid really well for these, like way more than nonunion standard, which is why a lot of actors flock to them
4. they’re typically hosted on tiktok or apps specifically designed for hosting verticals
5. as far as i am aware, dr. fangs does not prescribe mouse bites
5. as far as i
am aware, dr. fangs does
not prescribe mouse bites
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
Amazing dashboard pull today
quarterly reminder that if i reblog something ai-generated it is 110% and always an accident and for the love of god please tell me so i can delete it from my blog

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I can be the ship and its sailors
i mean this in the nicest way possible but some of you need to learn how to be annoyed
people are going to annoy you and that’s not a reason to burn bridges or blow up relationships
some people will even annoy you often! some people aren’t good at social cues and will therefore be frequently annoying! still not a reason to blow everything up!
What month were you born in?
January
February
March
April
May
June
July
August
September
October
November
December
Doing a final project in my stats class, we have to pick a subject and collect data on it. We need at least 100 data points, and I figured this blog is big enough that a poll on here could get to that pretty easily!
Doing my project on if it’s more likely to be born in certain months :]
I have gotten the OK from my teacher to collect data using a Tumblr poll, btw. I’m also going to have to send her this post as proof of where I got the data from / proof I didn’t just make up the numbers. So. Behave
bad media will piss you off good media will heal your soul bad media that couldve been good will ruin your life forever
first aid kid =/= all home medical supplies you might want for general health and comfort
a first aid kit should prioritize severe bleeding control—that means wound-packing gauze and dressing (not band-aids) and something for pressure—and emergency rescue meds, which could vary depending on your household/your conditions and the context but should definitely include things like benedryl and aspirin and narcan if you can get it. survival shears for cutting clothing and bandages. you should also have a CAT tourniquet and spare 5-10 minutes learning how to use it from a YouTube video. it’s truly not difficult.
other stuff is great to have for convenience and quality of life but is not for life-saving emergencies and should therefore be of secondary importance. if it won’t kill someone before an ambulance can get there, it’s not your priority. if you can carry more, that’s awesome, bring as much as you can.
“don’t use tourniquets because they can cause injury” again: five minutes on YouTube. five minutes on YouTube. take any stop the bleed course and EMTs are literally begging everyone to add tourniquets to their first aid kits because the risks are worth it—the scenarios in which tourniquets are needed are scenarios in which the alternative is bleeding out and dying. tourniquet injuries are better than death.
“I don’t need a real first aid kit because I don’t have life-threatening emergencies or encounter people who do” you exist in a world with cars. other shit too obviously but like. cars.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I’m sick and tired of found families we need more found toxic workplace environments
that made me giggle
not my circus not my monkeys but thanks to my mutuals i know some of the lore
General rules to live by:
You gotta be tough if you're gonna be stupid. You can do stupid shit all you want but you're not going to avoid suffering consequences.
If you can't be tough, you gotta be nice. People can forgive a lot of stupidity if you're polite about it and pleasant to be around.
You can't tell whether you're stupid or not. There is literally no way to know in advance, for absolute certainty, whether the thing you're just about to do is genius or stupid before it either splendidly succeeds or blows up in your face.
"I'm still kicking" is such a funny way to say "I'm still alive". Like lol. I'm still thrashing. Flailing. Writhing even. The violence remains.
Sooo so glad that "the violence remains" was a big hit with the Do not go gentle into that good night fans

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I cannot get this poem out of my head. It haunts me. Joyously, it haunts me.
This poem format is my favorite thing and this is the first time I’ve ever seen it’s origin story. I love it. Every time.
THE SACRED TEXTS!
I forgot the context! It’s beautiful!
I want you guys to all start making a bigger stink about Tumblr's Age Verification Horseshit.
Like they tried to change Reblogs and people rightfully got up in arms, this is a LOT worse. In order to have access to any sort of thing dubbed mature, and We haveALL seen what they think is mature, Everything from a black and white photo of a black woman's arm, to posts about IUD recalls, to a nude painted by a 17th century artist, to anything involving the word Trans; you have to send your personal information to a third party site that WILL get hacked, and you will be doxxed. And they can say "Oh shit, well it wasn't us who sent your name address and gender identity to Moldovan teenagers, here's a couple extra minutes in the ball pit.
That's bad enough!!!!!!!! But the entire idea of needing permission from state authorities to access anything labeled mature by our friendly AI overlords is some fucking Boll shit. Die Gedenken Sind Frie baby. This is all a reaction to people getting uppity about their lowly lowly rights and is being propped up by the same bad actors tht have made life unlivable. Fuck that shit.
"Well it's only being rolled out in Brazil and UK" Yeah, to start. "Well they're being forced to do this by laws." YOu know it's always really funny when these tech giants (Or whatever you call owning tumblr dot com) get really antsy about laws considering they pick and choose which ones they abide by.
This is a breaking point and it's going to be very interesting to see how we proceed from here.