“Self-aware” by Sergio Vallés on INPRNT
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“Self-aware” by Sergio Vallés on INPRNT

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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obsessed with this poor guy who gets dragged away from his takeout menu so his evil bisexual roommate can go have the worst club experience of his life
shane speaking russian w sveta but she keeps pinching his cheek and calling him dedushka bc his russian is so old fashioned and formal from his textbooks and ilya is trying soooooo hard not to get an earnesty boner over it all
importantly sveta does laugh at him and say "ARE YOU HARD???" which makes shane get bitchy and say "why are you looking at his dick. and why are you fucking hard pervert. jesus" and ilya is truly in heaven
I heard too many sounds at once and now I am a bitch

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I love you, vintage gay Pikachu. You’ll find the boy for you, I promise.
Just making use of my free will
Inspo🖼:The Meeting on the Turret Stairs
when the song tackles you to the ground and starts beating the ever loving shit out of you
HR twitter is crazy because people get on there and post about how those actor boys are racist then post a link to the worst fic you’ve ever seen in your life

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you know at least 2016 ilya rozanov had lemonade. like he had a lot of things not going well for him but at least he had lemonade by beyoncé
Listening to iris by the goo goo dolls again
maybe don't post every thought you have
suck me from behind or dont. sorry
i am my mother's child i'll love you 'til my breathing stops i'll love you 'til you call the cops on me
heated rivalry x writer in the dark by lorde
Occasionally as an Australian you'll be talking to someone from overseas, and you'll discover a common phrase you took for granted is, in fact, not universally known outside of our country.
Turns out casually dropping "fuck me dead" into conversation will give unsuspecting Americans an aneurism.
The more you know.
Imagine being on a work call with an Aussie and they suddenly announce they're gonna blow a load in response to a problem.
Not Aussie but I asked an American once if she was taking the piss ( i.e. pulling my leg, joking. Perfectly cromulent and friendly english expression)
and she got really upset because she thought I was threatening to piss ON her
This is killing me
Rifling through the tags, here's some other terms which are apparently causing mass carnage whenever they escape our borders:
Having a goon (i.e. Sipping on a delightful wine)
Having a gaytime (Eating an icecream)
Having a sticky beak (Investigating)
Take a squiz (To have a sticky beak)
Get stuffed (To express a revelation is most frightful)
Chuck a sickie (Take a day off work due to the humours being misaligned)
Chuck a wobbly (When one's temperament becomes visibly upset)
Carry on like a pork chop (Acting most silly indeed)
Thongs (flip flops)
Hot chook (Pre-cooked supermarket rotisserie chicken, otherwise known as the Bachelor's Handbag)
Fair suck of the sauce bottle (Let's be real)
Shits me to tears (Something is mildly annoying)
Not here to fuck spiders (Expressing a situation is serious)
Having a piss-up (A social gathering)
I'll shout you (offering to goon an old chum)
A cruisy place (a relaxed atmosphere, where one might shout and goon the night away while enjoying many a gaytime in your favourite thongs)

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ok i absolutely need to know what accents u all have pls reblog and tell me or comment or whatever I must know
Ilya is so lucky that Shane proposed. Ilya would have been a nervous fucking wreck for the entire day beforehand. Wake up in the morning. Look in the mirror. Today's the day. Sob. Breathe. Okay I'm good! Turn around and Shane's hair is all in his face, still asleep on Ilya's pillow. I am NOT good. Cold shower. Breakfast that Ilya does not eat. Morning jog wherein Ilya runs like someone is chasing him. Lunch that Ilya does not eat. Drive out to the cottage. Make Shane pull over because Ilya needs to dry heave on the side of the road. "Baby we don't have to drive out today if you're not feeling well." "NO WE HAVE TO." Get to the cottage. Immediately send Shane on some kind of extended fool's errand. Shane wants to stay because Ilya is SHAKING and he is so worried. "No my love I'm fine it's just the breeze off the lake haha." It's thirty fuckig degrees Celsius. Shane finally gtfo's. Yuna, David, Rose FUCKING Landry all descend to help Ilya set up. Well. Ilya is supposed to be helping but he is standing on the deck fully dissociating. Yuna brings him tea. "Are you going to throw up the tea?" "Yes probably." Yuna takes away the tea. 800 electronic tea lights on the deck. In a parallel Ilya has no way of understanding, he both puts on and takes off a suit. Yuna fixes his curls into the hockey boy quasi-mullet that magnetizes Shane's fingers to Ilya's hair and says, "Oh, you're so handsome!" Ilya cries big fat tears. David tells a story about how his proposal to Yuna almost didn't happen because David went to the hospital for heart palpitations that morning. Thank You David That Does Not Help Even Remotely. Ilya slav squats on the lawn for twenty minutes. Shane's car pulls up in the driveway and everyone hides while Ilya vibrates in the entryway. Shane has no less than thirty grocery bags hanging from his arms, still complaining about why the grocery service cancelled their delivery last minute. Ilya leads Shane and all thirty of his grocery bags onto the deck. Shane is doing his favorite thing (bitching) and his second favorite thing (Follow Ilya) so he doesn't notice his own mother tiptoing behind him collecting the grocery bags he drops like breadcrumbs. There is an Oscar-winning actress hiding under his sofa and Shane does not notice because Ilya takes him on the deck and drops to his knees and Shane is like, "Haha, right now?" and then he sees that Ilya has a look on his face like he's just been told the sun is never coming up again and he has his hands on Shane's knees and he is saying, "Shane. Please?" and Shane puts his hands on his head and says "Oh my God baby what's happening to you" as Ilya melts and melts and then from the depths of the cottage someone who sounds a lot like Shane's very own father is whispering "The ring the ring" and when he looks back down Ilya is fumbling a ring box out of his pocket. The first picture of their proposal is Shane glaring into the middle distance with a hand cradling Ilya's curls like a baby while Ilya ugly sobs into his knee.