The Luckiest ;)

the thing is ilya’s mother did disappear and his sibling hates him and his father tells him he shames him…. welcome back prince zuko

wait i forgot about my favorite low stakes headcanon which is that sasha from heated rivalry grows up to be stefon

Biblically need ilya on antidepressants and shane begging for that floppy dick like Please can I touch #it Please can I suck #it Please Please Please

i wrote something inspired by this! i kinda took the humiliation angle and ran with it as far as i could. i hope it's okay that i absconded with your brilliant idea and also made it so pervy

holy shit hi?????? This is so awesome I Will be reading this tonight 🫡

god ilya was so fucking whipped for shane i'll never be fucking over it. he had such a huge crush on shane hollander he wanted to kiss him so bad he wanted to touch him and fuck him and be close to him i'm Sick

ilya likes saying Go Piss Girl

drives me a special kind of crazy that hudson williams has huge ass hands but then really long thin fingers and he used to be an mma fighter but he has the world’s most perfect nose and he has really nice skin except for a scar on his shoulder that he got because his friend was like hey will you fight this guy for me and he was like sure and i have no idea where i was going with this do you think if i asked nicely i could get him to put his hand around my [loud airhorn]

ilya and shane hearing about the skip divorce and ilya is like “i always knew they would never last. they were not compatible.” and shane sucks his dick because he used the word compatible and it that’s like a sleeper agent call for shane to suck dick on command and then after he’s done sucking dick like the split second after he swallows he’s like “yeah they were always gonna get divorced.”

scott hunter IS the hamburgler

It’s like no one even wants to talk about Shane and Ilya getting drunk together for the first time at the cottage over small table with candles lit and Shane asking earnestly “is this how dates actually go? They’re nice”. And Ilya has to Die about it and Kiss him about it a lot because Shane means it- he’s been on dates but none that felt like this like Ilya was all over him and too far away at the same time and there was all this want tangled up under the table between them and the knowledge that they are going to fuck after this and he gets to watch Ilya laugh across the table and flirt with him and Shane gets to watch Ilya watch his mouth when he sips at his beer and feel the air thicken when he puts his feet between Ilya’s, like his pulse ticking up up when Ilya takes his hand briefly and opens his palm and traces his fingers over the lines of Shane’s palms as he’s explaining a play, using Shane’s hand as paper just as an excuse to touch