Take pride in what is sure to die

probiotic drinks are so funny. we put a billion guys in here

we gave your drink an infection

reblog if your gender is "It's not that simple"

a friend of mine tried to sell his soul on ebay and the starter price was $10 and people were bidding on it but before anything happened ebay took it down and sent him an email explaining that if he was selling a soul that didn’t actually exist then it was against their policy and if he was selling a real soul then that is a human body part and it is also against their policy 

BOOBS ARE BACK

BOOPS. I MEAN BOOPS. AJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSKASKSJKSSKSKAKKSKSKSKSJSSSJSJSJSJJSSJ

Petition to bring back the boop function next year for the ides of March where instead of a paw on the screen it’s a little knife that Caesar gets stabbed with