Erin McKelle

You know, I wish I had a good answer to this. It wasn't intentional. Some of it was due to going through trauma and a lot of shitty things that led me to disengage from many areas of my life. Some of it was a lack of inspiration and interest. Some of it was because of the decline in Tumblr that took place since it was acquired by Yahoo!

By: Rocío Ortiz

When we speak of Gender Violence, we are not negating the existence of abuse towards men and children. These are reprehensible physical and emotional attacks, punishable by law (in many cases insufficiently). However, not every instance of violence is considered gender violence. Gender violence means systemic violence performed by men inside of the social framework of the Patriarchy, which allows men to feel legitimately justified to use it against women.

According to the Declaration on the Elimination of Violence against Women of the UN:

Article 1

For the purposes of this Declaration, the term "violence against women" means any act of gender-based violence that results in, or is likely to result in, physical, sexual or psychological harm or suffering to women, including threats of such acts, coercion or arbitrary deprivation of liberty, whether occurring in public or in private life.

Article 2

Violence against women shall be understood to encompass, but not be limited to, the following:

Physical, sexual and psychological violence occurring in the family, including battering, sexual abuse of female children in the household, dowry-related violence, marital rape, female genital mutilation and other traditional practices harmful to women, non-spousal violence and violence related to exploitation;

Physical, sexual and psychological violence occurring within the general community, including rape, sexual abuse, sexual harassment and intimidation at work, in educational institutions and elsewhere, trafficking in women and forced prostitution;

Physical, sexual and psychological violence perpetrated or condoned by the State, wherever it occurs.

Violence against women is not just one more aspect of general violence, but instead it’s a tool wielded by one gender to ensure its dominance over others. To preserve the existing inequality within our society, at a macro level and in personal relationships. To defend a model who gives power and privileges to men.

We could represent gender violence as a pyramid. At the top, we would place violent behaviors. However said top is not able to sustain itself, it relies on the existence of a very particular foundation composed of a cultural model (sexism) and a social structure (androcentrism).

 It resembles an iceberg more than a pyramid, where one only sees a top made of violent behavior but the support system that enables this behavior remains hidden out of view; making it very difficult to address the underlying cause.

Intimate partner violence is “ physical, sexual, or psychological harm by a current or former partner or spouse,” according to the CDC.

It requires the existence of an emotional link between the members of the couple, which is from where this type of abuse draws its power.  Along with child abuse and elder abuse, it falls under what we call Domestic Violence: Patterns of behavior that involve physical or emotional abuse in a domestic context. Intimate violence is incredibly damaging because it poisons the emotional perception of the victim, subjecting her well-being to the approval of the aggressor. This affects the victim in several ways:

It is intimate: It concerns the very core of the person involved.

It’s continuous: It exists in the past, the present and the future.

It feels inevitable and unescapable: The victim feels unable to evade the punishments in the short term and end the relationship in the long term.

It perverts every interaction between the victim and the aggressor: Fear permeates every action the victim takes, because any choice and/or omission might have undesirable consequences.

There are two fundamental processes to understand intimate partner violence, specially the way that they relate:

The Cycle of the Violence

The term cycle of violence refers to repeated and dangerous acts of violence as a cyclical pattern, associated with intense emotions and doctrines of retribution or revenge. The pattern, or cycle, repeats and can happen many times during a relationship. Each phase may last a different length of time and over time the level of violence may increase. It can be divided in three big sections that branch in different steps:

Tension accumulation: The tension is the result of an increase in conflicts in the couple. The aggressor is hostile, though he still does not demonstrate it with physical violence. The victim tries to calm the situation down and avoids to do things that might set off the abuser, thinking that she can avoid the future aggression. This phase can expand for several years.

Within it we can find a set-up phase were the abuser begins setting the victim up and puts his plan in motion, creating a situation where he can justify the abuse.

Explosion: It is the result of the tension accumulated in phase one. Step by step the fights and problems increase in number and intensity, they becoming harder to avoid, the tension increases until it’s so unbearable that the violent episode happens. The aggressor exercises the violence in its wider sense: through verbal, psychological, physical and/or sexual aggressions. It is in this phase when the victims present charges or requests help. There are a couple of steps that will happen in this phase:

Fantasy and planning: The abuser begins to fantasize about abusing the victim again. He spends a lot of time thinking about what she has done wrong and how he'll make her pay. Then he makes a plan for turning the fantasy of abuse into reality.

Abuse: The abuser lashes out with aggressive, belittling, or violent behavior. The abuse is a power play designed to show "who is the boss."

Honeymoon: During this stage the tension and the violence disappear and the abuser claims to feel bad about what he has done, fulfilling the victim of promises of change. Often the victim grants another opportunity to the aggressor, believing firmly that things are going to change. This phase makes it harder for victims to end the relationship since even though they are aware that the aggressions can happen again, at this moment she sees the best face of her aggressor, which feeds her hopes that she can change him.

This stage of the cycle of the violence is what supports both members of the couple in the relationship, waiting for new “honeymoons”. The cycle will repeat itself several times and the honeymoon will become shorter and shorter, with the aggressions becoming increasingly violent. The honeymoon provides "proof” that change is possible and it can manage to sustain 10/15 years of opportunities for the relationship.

In this phase we find the final steps of the cycle:

Guilt: After the abuse, the partner feels guilt, but not over what he's done. He’s more worried about the possibility of being caught and facing consequences for his abusive behavior.

Excuses: The abuser rationalizes what he or she has done. The person may come up with a string of excuses or blame the victim for the abusive behavior anything to avoid taking responsibility.

"Normal" behavior: The abuser does everything he can to regain control and keep the victim in the relationship. He may act as if nothing has happened, or he may turn on the charm. This peaceful honeymoon phase may give the victim hope that the abuser has really changed this time, and the suffering is over.

Process of the Violence

We all have heard someone say “If my partner ever even tried to threaten me, I would just leave". You might have even said it yourself. And it is true, if a partner threatened us with physical violence, we all would take the decision to quickly leave the relationship. What most people overlook is the fact that physical violence is not the first step: it comes after many other abusive behaviors that shape the independent and healthy woman that enters the relationship into a victim. In fact, physical violence is not even necessary. If the emotional abuse is effective enough, it might never reach the point of physical aggression. It starts small: Jane meets John and after some time getting to know each other, they begin dating. John, who has behaved like a normal guy until now, turns out to be an abuser. He is not aware of it, he is just a normal fellow who cares about his girl. Yes, he is a bit jealous, but that’s because he cares. A bit of jealousy is healthy!

Isolation: He doesn’t really get on well with Jane’s family, he doesn’t like her friends. Jane is aware of the tense and difficult situations that arise every time she is there with John and doesn’t understand why they don’t approve of her relationship with John. She ends up deciding that if they don’t support her choice it’s because they don’t care about her and stops talking to everyone who disapproves of her relationship. What Jane is not aware of is that the tension has not appeared out of nowhere, it is the result of those who cared about her when faced with the behavior of John, who thought that all that people around her where taking time away from their relationship. She doesn’t need friends anyway, he has his own and he trusts them.

Also, it’s not like Jane had a lot of time to hang out with her friends or coworkers, she spends most of her free time with John and her friends just don’t understand. Her coworkers have decided to stop inviting her over, because she never shows up. But for Jane, John is more than enough.

Control and Prohibitions: So Jane doesn’t hang out with her friends or family, they barely talk, in fact. She no longer has healthy relationships in her live to compare to her romantic relationship, the sense of if this or that behavior is normal or not is completely lost. In addition, John is her only friend and companion, so when he says that the skirt she was going to wear to a party makes her legs look fat she chooses to change into something else. John is just trying to be helpful and he didn’t mean for her to feel bad. Such a small thing is not worth getting into a fight. John has discovered that the mere chance of a fight is enough for Jane to change her decisions so John just needs to express his disapproval for his word to become law.

Humiliation: It is starting to bother Jane that John criticizes what she is going to wear or do so much she starts confronting him about that when he complains. One day John comments on the skirt she was wearing and it escalated into a fight. Ever since, the ugly comments, the backhanded compliments and straight up insults have been constant. Jane does not have the positive reinforcement of her family and friends helping to pick her up after the fights. So when John screams in the middle of lunch that she is just a dumb, fat wh*re like her mother, Jane’s fear of losing him (her only friend and only support system), the pain of a damaged relationship with her mother and the self-esteem issues that have been plaguing her since that first fight push her into compliance.

Shouts and Insults/Scorn and humiliations/Accusations and recriminations/Threats and intimidation/Inductions to fear/Environmental mistreatment/Emotional Abuse/Sexual Abuse/Etc.: The fights with John are a constant threat now. They happen more often, they are more unexpected and they get increasingly more violent. The moments of peace and quiet are scarce but Jane clings to them with everything she has. The fear has become chronic, she can’t even sleep anymore because John storms in to wake her up and scream and insult her, just the possibility of that happening keeps Jane wide open through the nights. The screams, insults and humiliations have become part of their daily life and everything that Jane does turns into a weapon against her. Even her family photos that were hidden on a box under the bed, ripped by John one angry afternoon.

Jane has tried to speak with her parents and her friends and they drove her to the police station at 3:00 in the morning after a fight, they helped her quickly fill a trash bag with her things so she could leave while John was out working,… but they grew tired of having to come back for Jane, of trying to explain why his promises weren’t real. They grew tired of the pain of seeing a loved one so trapped in a destructive live.

Jane already is not the person who entered the relationship, now she is a victim.

The psychological violence continues with humiliations, the constant fear of doing something that could trigger conflict. In few occasions that Jane tries to get out or fight back, the consequences are worse, and he hasn’t even touched her yet.

Would Jane have stayed in the relationship if John had slapped her in the beginning? Obviously not, but has time passes, a slap or a beating are the result of Jane’s resistance against the abuse. She is punished because she still fights back.

Abuse has serious consequences:

It critically damages all the areas in the life of the victim: social, behavioral, affective, physical, mental, sexual and intellectual health.

Nullification of the personality: It renders what was once a person with thoughts and opinions into someone who merely exists.

Traumatic link

Strong emotional dependence (Bosai effect/Paradoxical affection)

Domestic violence needs the victim to be isolated, regardless of whether said isolation is being caused directly by the abuser or circumstances beyond his control (a woman who has moved to a different place where she is far from family and friends, for example). This lack of external, positive social contact traps the victim into a kind of Stockholm syndrome or bonsai effect: The same person who is making my life a living hell is the person who provides the love and affection I cling to in order to stay sane. The effects of this can appear as soon as in 5 hours. Imagine how difficult it is for Jane to actually leave when, over a coffee, a friend tells her she must.

The BlankBuzz Politics podcast has made its return! After a hiatus, hosts Erin McKelle and Wesley Walsh discuss how they’ve been surviving quarantine and share their insights on this week’s top headlines:

NY Governor Andrew Cuomo’s controversial mural of donated masks

The sexual assault and harassment allegations against Biden

The impact of states re-opening

The war for power between NYC mayor Bill de Blasio and Governor Andrew Cuomo

How the coronavirus could impact Biden’s campaign and the general 2020 election

Keep up with BlankBuzz Online:

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Twitter: @BlankBuzz

Follow Erin on Social Media:

Twitter: @ErinMcKelle

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Twitter: @IndianaWalsh

Be sure to rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts! Get a free social media consultation by sending a screenshot of your review to [email protected].

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LISTEN ON APPLE PODCASTS: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/blankbuzz-politics-podcast/id1505012062

I strive to use eco-friendly and actually healthy products in everything, from toothpaste, to setting spray, and everything in between. However, there are a few specific type of products that I’ve had a hard time finding good natural alternatives for, that actually get the job done, with one of the toughest being deodorant.

I’ve tried every natural deodorant in the book and had to learn that hard way that most of them are a total fail. They are great in theory, but either wear off in 20 minutes or don’t even leave you smelling fresh AT ALL. So annoying.

After some trial and error over the years, I’ve found a few legit natural deodorants that I’m a fan of and use myself. I’m here to share that knowledge with you, so that if you want to use natural deodorant that’s better for your body and the earth, you can do so while still reaping the benefits of smelling nice and fresh, all day.

Tom’s Of Maine Long Lasting Wild Lavender Deodorant This was the first natural deodorant I found that actually worked for me, courtesy of my mom (thanks Mom!). This deodorant has my favorite fragrance of lavender and it actually smells like lavender- it’s not a faint scent! Plus, I find that it last all day and goes on really nice and smooth too, I had those creamy, pasty deodorants that are huge in the natural market.

2. The Honest Company Vetiver Deodorant      

A deodorant in the form of a spray?! Could be a disaster or a total win, which luckily for me, it’s the later.This spray smells so fragrant and energizing, with ingredients like       lemon, witch hazel, sandalwood, and sage. It goes on really easily with the spray and doesn’t feel sticky whatsoever. Plus, it really is long lasting and a great item to throw into    your gym bag or purse for using on the go

    Have you tried either of these deodorant options? Let me know if you’ve found a different natural deodorant that you use and love!

First Impressions: Stila One Step Correct

Hello my loves!

As a certified beauty whore (patent pending), I’m always trying new products and finding new formulas for trends that are so 3 months ago. So naturally, when I was at Sephora a few weeks ago and saw this Stila One Step Correct color corrector, I couldn’t resist the temptation to try it out.

The idea of the product is that it takes all of the fuss out of color correcting, by…

I’m excited to bring you the first post in a new blog series I’m going to be calling “Travel Like a Queen,” where I’ll be giving you all of the best recommendations for traveling in style like the queen you are to various destinations that I’ve visited.

In May, I visited Dallas for the first time and fell in love with this Southern city. It’s got a really cool, laid back vibe, but also a sense of newness and coolness that most other cities don’t; it’s like that elusive pop-star who is sweet, sassy, and down to earth, but also incredibly chic and sophisticated at the same time.

I would highly recommend visiting this city, if you love cold pressed juices, outdoor cafe’s, shopping, lounging by the pool, and good old Southern hospitality. It’s a great spot for a city girl like yours truly, or a country gal who loves to roam the fields (is that what country girls do? LOL!).

FOOD: Public School 214,  Café Victoria, Medina Oven & Bar, Chino Chinatown, Saint Ann Restaurant & Bar, & Buda Juice

I am such a foodie and getting to experience new cuisines is one of my favorite parts of traveling. So naturally, I checked out a ton of the local bars and restaurants that Dallas had to offer and found some amazing gems in the heart of Texas.

Public School 214:

This is honestly one of the cutest restaurants I’ve ever been to in my life. I love a good theme, especially when a restaurant’s takes it all the way down to their lightbulbs and silverware. That’s exactly what I found at Public School, a trendy hipster-esque bar in Uptown. Their menus look like school planners and notebooks, their decor featuring displays like the Periodic Table, and their tables and chairs reminiscent of a lunchroom. Their food was also THE BOMB. I had some Nutella French Toast, one of my all time faves, and it was honestly the BEST FRENCH TOAST I’VE EVER HAD NO JOKE.

This is definitely on the mandatory check-out list for D-Town. They earn an A+ in my gradebook.

Café Victoria:

Located in Victory Park, Café Victoria is a mix of rustic, industrial-chic, and classic farmhouse decor, with some killer brews to boot. I love the unique vibe of this café, which also reflects the style of Dallas very well.

I was also obsessed with the cups and creamer that they gave me to drink out of- how cute are these?

Medina Oven & Bar:

So damn good- if you love Mediterranean food, you will love what Media Oven has to offer. I had some epic flat bread and Moroccan Mint Tea here that was savory and just to die for, in general.

Chino Chinatown:

I have a sweet spot for both Asian and Mexican cuisines, so what could be better than going to a trendy restaurant that combines both of my favorite categories of food?

I loved the overall vibe of this place- it’s located in this central market kind of place that has a lot of other restaurants & vendors. It has a very industrial chic look about it that I’ve found to be very common in Dallas, which is also one of my favorite styles of decor and design.

The food was amazing, that’s all I can really say. This is not a place you want to miss.

Saint Ann Restaurant & Bar

On my last day in D-town, I was looking for a hip, chic place to have brunch and certainly found that at Saint Ann’s. The restaurant has an indoor/outdoor atmosphere and such a fun vibe- there were hanging lights, mimosas flowing, a band playing, and beautiful, light decor. I felt like I was at a wedding! It was so pretty.

Buda Juice:

I have a cold pressed juice addiction and of course I had to feed my craving in Dallas! Right next to the hotel I stayed at was a Buda Juice, which is a Texas chain that serves bomb-ass juice. I had some of their Buda Almond Milk, which is filled with smooth, sweet almond milk and spices like vanilla, cinnamon, and cardamom. Total juicegasm.

SHOPPING: Victory Park , NorthPark Center &  West Village

I’ll be honest, one of my favorite parts of travel is THE SHOPPING. I love to explore new stores and boutiques in different cities and see the difference in the trends and styles they’re selling- and trust me, it really DOES depend on where you are. Even in chain stores, you’ll find different merchandise for sale if you’re in a different part of the country or world.

VICTORY PARK:

Sorry for the lack of Victory Park pics!

The hotel I stayed at was located in Victory Park (more on that below), which is a cute, quiet part of Downtown Dallas that’s pretty upscale and chic. It’s still being built largely, so you can expect to see a lot of new restaurants and shops popping up there in the comings months. In the meantime, you should definitely check out Read Between The Lines, V.O.D. Boutique, Simply Elegant Dallas, and all of the amazing restaurants, like Buda Juice and Medina Oven, as mentioned above.

NorthPark Center: 

Um. OMG. Best mall ever.

OK, maybe not better than the Mall of America, but it was pretty damn close. This mall is incredibly large, chic, and upscale. It has an amazing industrial chic vibe which I’ve already raved about, with refinished concrete floors, ornate sculptures, and exposed beams. It’s fucking gorgeous.

They’ve also got stores at all price points, from H&M, to Gucci. This mall is huge, so definitely plan to spend at least a few hours there, browsing the racks.

My favorite picks? Lou & Grey, Lorna Jane Active Living, Anthropologie, fresh, lululemon, & Sephora (duh).

West Village:

This is probably the most well-known shopping destination in D-town and for good measure. This is a really trendy and cute neighborhood that’s extremely walkable and has a really nice charm to it. This is a great place to get brunch and spend the afternoon browsing through the racks.

Public School 214 is located in here (YOU MUST MUST GO!) but in terms of stores, my best picks are Pitaya, y&i, & Flirt Boutique.

HOTEL: The W

I stayed at the W Dallas, which is one of my favorite hotel chains. Did you know that “W” stand for Whatever, Wherever? I think that’s so clever. Maybe it’s really lame but, I happen to like it.

The hotel itself is really unique and boutique- feeling- the lobby has concrete floors and an ornate bar room that is filled with intricate furnishings and crystal chandeliers. There’s also an amazing rooftop pool deck with an infinity pool view that is just beyond words.

How gorgeous though?!

The W also features a Bliss spa, which is one of my favorite spa-esque beauty brands and companies (check out my review of the Bliss at home spa kit here), but it left me a little disappointed- I wouldn’t go to this spa if I was you.

First of all, my manicurist did not do a good job on my nails and they had weird little streaks going through them that were driving me crazy. Second, the spa has no actual separation from the pool area, so you’re constantly hearing the music, people going in and out, and whatnot- you’d think a spa would come with some doors, right? Not very relaxing

The room was gorgeous though and the bed super comfy. Overall, it’s a solid hotel, just avoid the spa at all costs.

I had a great time in Dallas- I’d highly recommend going to this urban destination if you’re craving southern charm, good food, quiet streets (well maybe not lately), and industrial charm.

If you’ve been to Dallas and have some other destination recommendations, let me know below!

Hi loves!

Can you believe that it’s already AUGUST?! Where did 2016 go? I remember New Year’s like it was yesterday- how are we 2/3 through the year? I can’t believe it.

I decided to do another favorites video this month, because I have a lot of new and newish products that I’m loving and wanted to share with you all. Plus, these kinds of blog posts and videos are some of my favorite to watch…

Seriously though…avocado toast has become my OBSESSION over the last couple of months; I must eat it at least 4 or 5 days a week. It’s that good.

What I love about avocado toast is that it’s very filling and satiating, but it’s still healthy…at least the way I make it!

If you’re ready to chow down on some delicious and healthy avo toast, here’s the ingredients that you will need (makes 2 servings):

2 pieces of whole grain or multigrain bread

1/2 of an avocado (this can vary depending on the size of the avocado you’re using; assume 1/2 of one large avocado)

1 tablespoon of extra virgin olive oil

The juice of 1/2 of a lime

1 teaspoon of cayenne pepper or paprika

1.5 tablespoons of hemp seeds

1/4 of a jalepeño

1 large handful of fresh cilantro (I like a lot of cilantro)

First, grill or toast your bread. Once it’s toasted to your liking, slice open your avocado and mash about 1/4 of it onto each piece of bread, using a fork or butter knife.

Then, start to add your toppings: start with the olive oil and lime, also spreading it with a butter knife over the entire piece of bread. Next, add on your cayenne pepper or paprika, which will stick nicely to the avocado and oil. Then come the hemp seeds, which you can sprinkle on to your liking- in case you’re note familiar, hemp seeds are an excellent source of both omega-3 and omega-6 fatty acids, both of which are so crucial for your health. So they’re great to add as a topping, but flax seeds or chia seeds are also great alternatives if you’re not a fan of hemp.

Finely, slice your jalapenos into thin slices and stick on top of each slice of bread. Finally, add on your cilantro (feel free to dice it first- I like A LOT of cilantro on my toast so I don’t do this, but you can if prefer this preparation) and get to eating!

This is a great breakfast food to get your energy up in the morning, a mid-day snack, or even a great side dish or appetizer to add onto your lunch or dinner. I eat it in all of these ways and find that it really gives me a nice boost of energy and makes me feel nice and full.

I recently rediscovered the space buns look and I’m officially obsessed. This whimsical hairstyle brings a really interesting twist to any look, while also giving you an edge- I can almost guarantee you’ll turn some heads and be catching many an eye.

Plus it’s super comfortable and easy to wear; I’m not someone who likes to have my hair in my face (hence why my hair is pulled up so often) and this is fun way to accomplish that without going for an average bun or ponytail.

This look couldn’t be easier to create- just follow these simple steps!

1. Create Your Part

I’m not someone who likes to create an actual part in my hair, but feel free to do that if that’s your thing. Instead, I’m just going to separate my hair into two equal sections. Equal is the key word here- your look won’t be cute if your buns aren’t even, so make sure that you separate your hair into 2 sections with equal amounts of hair in each.

2. Grab 2 Hair Ties

I highly recommend using gel ties like I have here, as they are gentle on your hair, as well as being easy to maneuver. Place each tie on your wrists, starting with your non-dominant hand (you’ll thank me later).

3. Get to Tyin’

Gather the first side of your hair on top of your head and form a loose bun. The hair should be on the side-top of your head on each side, as to make sure they aren’t too close together or far apart- think parallel to the start of the end of your eyebrow. Then, take the tie on the wrist of your non-dominant hand and place the tie on your fingers, about halfway down. Pull the tie down once on top of your head and pull through, securing the loose bun. Then, double or triple the tie, depending on how much hair you have and how loose or tight you want your buns to be. Repeat on the other side.

4. Adjust

Now, take a second to examine your handiwork: do both sides look even on your head? Do the buns match in shape and size? Pull hair through or out as needed to make sure that your space buns are even. Shake your head to test the tightness of your buns

5. Finish with a Spray

I prefer to use sea salt spray, but you can really use any kind of hair spray to finish off the look, holding everything in place.

Seriously, I can’t get over the cuteness.

It’s been awhile since I’ve done a recipe post and I’m ready to bring them back!

I recently made these DELISH tofu tacos and thought that this would be the perfect recipe to share with my blog readers. It’s seriously simple to make, really yummy, and totally vegan. It’s also a healthy version of tacos, which in a traditional sense are often filled with not-so-nice ingredients.

To make these tacos, you’ll need (make 3 tacos or 1 serving):

3 corn taco shells (the only ingredients should be corn, lime, and water)

1/4 block of extra firm tofu

1 red onion

1 cup of butter lettuce

3 baby bell peppers

1 jalepeño

1 handful of cilantro

1/4 of an avocado

2 tablespoons of sriracha, 1/2 tablespoon of lime juice, 1 teaspoon of soy sauce for the marinade

For the sauce:

3-4 tablespoons of Sriracha

1/2 teaspoon of Manuka honey

1 tablespoon of lime juice

1 teaspoon of rice vinegar

1 tablespoon of minced garlic

1 teaspoon of soy sauce

A pinch of paprika

Step 1: Marinade the tofu with Sriracha, lime, and soy sauce for anywhere between 20 minutes and 4 hours, depending on how strong you want the flavor to be. Slice the block into fourths and slice each piece lengthwise.

Step 2: Grill the corn tortilla shells, either on a small grill like a George Foreman, on an actual grill, or on a gas stove.

Step 3: Meanwhile, prepare your vegetables: slice your onion, baby bell peppers, and jalapeño. Open your avocado and slice three to five strips to add to your taco. Chipenade your cilantro.

Step 4: Once browned, remove your taco shells from the grill. Replace with your tofu and let cook until there are visible grill marks .

Step 5: Assemble your tacos by adding in your tofu and vegetables to the shells

Step 6: Now, onto the sauce! For this, all you have to do is combine the ingredients of the sauce into a bowl (no need to blend) and stir with a spoon. Then, add on the side, on top of your tacos directly, or both!

How yummy do these look?!

I went to the Mall of America on July 3rd, 2016. LOL. Seriously though, it’s hard to not oogle over every detail of this trip, since I’ve been wanting to go the MOA since I was 8 or 9 years old and first developed my love of shopping.

As to how it all came about, I was looking to get away for the 4th of July holiday weekend, but hadn’t planned a trip and was looking to find a really good flight deal. I’m somewhat of a spontaneous traveler and because I have so much experience flying and traveling on my own (I lived on the road for about 5 months last year), that planning a trip in a few days doesn’t phase me at all.

Lo and behold, I found a flight for under $200 round trip to Minneapolis. I’d never been to Minnesota and knew it wouldn’t be super crowded for the holiday, since it’s not a historic hotspot, and would be a really fun place to explore. I booked my ticket and was then informed by my mom that I had chosen the destination that housed the Mall of America.

I hadn’t even realized this upon booking, so I became even MORE excited, once I learned this. I wanted to devote a day of my 4 day trip just to MOA, since it was so massive (the largest mall in the country, in fact) and I wanted to cover as much ground as I could.

On Day 2 of my trip, Sunday the 3rd, I decided it would be the perfect day to head to the mall- part of my just couldn’t wait to go and the only other day that would make sense to go was Tuesday- but I had to catch a plane at 8pm, so I was worried my shopping could get cut short.

I was in awe the second I saw the size of the mall. Interestingly, there’s not some huge grand front entrance like I thought there would be (or maybe there is and I just never saw it!), just a bunch of massive parking garages that led into entrance ways to the mall.

The architecture in the mall was stunning and made me feel like I was in a modern shopping mecca. I loved the crisp, all white look the mall had going for it.

I started my day at Starbucks (of course!) and then decided to just walk around and see where my heart led me. One of my first stops was to a cool, modern hipster-esque store called Garage, named after Garage, California. It reminded me of a cooler version of Hollister (also named after a California town), with fast-paced music, eager salespeople, and a dark interior.

From there, I picked up this gray off-the-shoulder top, which is unbelievably soft and cozy. I’ve been wearing it a lot in the past few days, it’s seriously so comfortable. In addition, I purchased this mango and green tea face mask that I used on the last day of the trip, which really did clear up my skin and make everything look tighter and brighter.

From there, I headed to get some food at Panda Express, because I was pretty hungry and I’m a die-hard Panda Express fan. There’s no shame in my game!

Next up shopping wise was Nordstrom Rack, one of my all-time faves. I found this really cute and comfy bralette, sunscreen oil, and these cute as can be kitten socks. The sunscreen oil is SPF 50 and a product I’ve never seen before- a sunscreen in the form of an oil rather than a lotion, spray, gel, or creme. This I’m curious to try. I also originally bought a travel bag with macaroons on it, as my previous one had broken in the airport (a barista had to give me some duck tape), but I ended up finding one I liked even more at my next destination…

Lulumeon had my all time favorite Align Pants on sale, which I have 6 pairs of in black. Since they only had this aqua pair on the sale rack, I figured why not go for something different?

This is the travel bag that ultimately won out. Like, I can’t even begin to tell you all how obsessed I am with this bag. It has tons of outside and inside pockets, one even big enough to fit a laptop in, an inside shell that’s waterproof and mint green, a nice, soft, buttery leather-like (maybe real? hopefully not?) outer shell, with these cool waterproof black and white pockets. The bag is huge but also cute as a tote which was exactly what I was looking for in a travel purse. So, I ended up buying this one and returning the non-pictured macaroon bag.

I didn’t expect to go into, much less buy, anything at Kate Spade, but curiosity won me over. I immediately scoured the jewelry section, since I have a necklace of the Capricorn goat (my rising sign) that I wear almost everyday, ironically from Nordstrom Rack, that I love. The sales guy dug around and found that they had one companion bracelet left for Capricorn (they didn’t have anything for my my sun sign (Sag) nor moon (Pisces). I’m a business astrology coach, so the zodiac is very important to me and I like having jewellery to represent it in my life, which is what compelled me to buy this.

Did you really think I’d go shopping and NOT hit up Sephora? Of course not. I ended up finding some great goodies there, which included this facial sunscreen primer, screen wipes that are actually good for your skin, a hair conditioning kit, and a free sample size version of the Clinique Pep Start eye cream (which I am loving, by the way).

I also went to some stores where I didn’t purchase anything, which I didn’t picture but TRUST ME, was extensive. I spent about 5 hours in the mall total and it was great- but exhausting. I was so ready to head back to my hotel and get dinner afterwards!

Overall, this was a great experience and a great trip- the Mall of America has a lot to offer and I’d highly encourage going if you have the chance to. Just beware of how big it actually is!

Target & TJMAXX Beauty Haul

Hello loves!

I’m really obsessed with fashion and beauty hauls- admittedly, they are some of my favorite posts to read or watch!

I recently took a trip to TJMAXX and Target, picking up some fab beauty products in the midst. I thought this would be a good opportunity to share the magic that is the beauty section of TJMAXX. Most people already know that Target is THE place to be to get some…

I’m always looking for new stores and shops to obsess over and Anthropologie has officially won my heart.

I have to admit, I didn’t used to be a fan of Anthro, at all. I wasn’t crazy about the ultra-feminine aesthetic, because I’m more of an edgy, trendy dresser.

However, lately my style has evolved to be slightly more fem and I really dig the industrial chic architecture that you’ll find inside of Anthropologie. I’m really big on stores that have a theme and fully commit, down to the lightbulbs and doorknobs. It gives you a VIBE that transports you into their universe while you’re shopping their.

So, I was delighted to find some AMAZING goodies at Anthropologie across categories and wanted to share them with you in a haul-style post.

Can we just talk about this bag for a second, though? It’s like a piece of art! How gorgeous! It’s also reusable with cloth handles, which is something that I appreciate from any retailer- thoughtful design.

Now let’s talk about what’s in the bag!

First, we’ve got 2 reading materials: Darling Magazine‘s 15th issue and Love X Life X Style, a book by Garance Tore, who runs a blog by the same name. I’ve had my eye on this lifestyle book for a while and Darling Magazine has an incredible mission in empowering women. I’m excited to dive into both of these great reads!

Next up, we’ve got fashion. Although it’s not unfolded in this picture, I purchased this mint green tank top that’s just to die for in color. On top of that, there’s a blue, pink, and white turban that is just too adorable for words!

Then we’ve got this love + salt sea spray that I can’t wait use to tame my wild, curly hair.

Finally, there’s this delicate “e” gold necklace, that also has an abstractly placed fake diamond that adds a really interesting and unique detail to this necklace, that got me to say “yes” to it!

I’m already back on the Anthropologie website, ready to purchase another top, so this current covet isn’t going away, anytime sooN!

I’ve also never been one for contacts, since having to touch your eyes everyday is just a thought that freaks me out. No bueno. Plus, I really like how I look in glasses.

I recently went to the eye doctor for an exam and lo and behold, my prescription changed. It actually got WORSE for the first time, ever. I’m officially getting old, guys.

The only silver lining here is that I can justify getting new specs. It just so happened that GlassesShop.com reached out to me at the same time, asking if I’d like to review a pair of their glasses, so of course I took them up on it!

GlassesShop is a great option for purchasing affordable, stylish, and high-quality glasses online and is honestly one of the best online glasses websites I’ve come across. They’ve got a healthy selection of frames in interesting colors and styles that I’ve yet to see marketed anywhere else. Upon browsing, I was immediately impressed with their selection of glasses and had a hard time choosing a pair, there were so many great ones!

I decided upon this gorgeous pink pair, the Shreveport Cat Eye in Pink, that was definitely different from any style of specs that I’ve ever had before. I loved the cat eye shape of the glasses, as well as the fun pop of color that they’d give to my face.

The second I took them out of the package, I was impressed with how high-quality the frames were. They come in a nice glasses case with a cleansing cloth that both protects the lenses during transport and gives you a nice little bonus to keep your lenses clean.

I’ve always hesitated to purchase glasses online, because of the issue of fit. I’ve had SO many glasses in the past that I’ve had to have adjusted numerous times in order to create the perfect fit, so I was worried that they wouldn’t fit correctly and I’d have to find some way to get them adjusted. However, I was pleasantly surprised to find that they fit perfectly- PERFECTLY. They weren’t too loose, too tight, or at all uncomfortable.

In terms of the look, I feel like a chic version of Harry Potter. Definitely a new look for me! It took me a little while to get used to them, because of how drastically different they are from my former glasses. At first, I didn’t feel like me and almost didn’t recognize myself. But after a few hours, I was obsessed. I LOVED them. I felt so cute and perky and….like ME!

In the spirit of total transparency, the one negative I found with the glasses was that they took a while to adjust too, in terms of the lenses. They made me slightly dizzy, which I read was probably a factor in my former glasses being a radically different shape and size than these frames.

Sometimes, it’s time for a change in life and especially when you’re talking about frames you wear on your face every single day.

Besides the range of designs and stellar quality, GlassesShop also offers affordable prices on their frames, so you can get more than one pair and don’t necessarily have to spend $400 or $500 on one pair that you’re indebted to, like you do from traditional glasses retailers. The frames I’m wearing are less than $50! They also have prescription sunglasses available as well, which I highly recommend investing in for anyone who wears a prescription, like me. It’s well worth it!

If you want to get a pair of specs from GlassesShop, I have an exclusive offer for my readers; enter the code GSHOT50 at checkout to receive 50% off on eyeglasses and sunglasses with free lenses included (except for frames that are already on sale). If you’re looking for a new pair of glasses to change up your look with, make sure you get in on this amazing discount.

On a recent trip to NYC, I decided to take a midnight walk over to Sephora, since I was staying in the Theatre District right next to Times Square. There, I found this amazing fragrance cocktail kit from Commodity, which allows you to combine unique scents to make your own perfume cocktail that you can mix and match according to your mood.

The kit includes 10 of Commodity’s premium unisex fragrances that you can use to layer to create your own scent cocktails. The kit includes 5 white collection fragrances which they describe as “bright, airy, and easy,” along with 5 black collection scents they deem “complex, moody, and intense.” They’re designed to be layered, in order to bring out each’s unique properties.

When I found this kit, I was hooked. I loved the creativity and the idea behind it and figured it’d be a great way to test drive some different scents without having to commit to just one perfume. Plus, it gave me license to be creative!

I really loved the simple yet chic design of the kit, which was easy to read, understand, and use. You basically just remove the kit from the sleeve and get to work. There is a menu of sorts included that gives you 3 signature fragerence cocktail recipes and some information on how potent each scent is. But really, you’re given full reign to go to town!

For my first attempt, I decided to first test out one of the cocktails they’d created, Morning Fog, which contained 1 part Rain and 1 part Moss. I instantly found the Rain scent to be refreshing and leave that smell of newness that a rain shower provokes. Moss is very earthy and reminds me of well, being next to a massive mossy tree. I loved how true to name the scents were and found this cocktail to be sensual, yet brisk. I was hooked.

Next up, I decided to create a cocktail of my own, with the 1 part Tea and 1 part Wool. I was a little taken aback by the potency of Wool, with its somewhat harsh, industrial scent. However, the tea helped to give it a mellowness that made the scent quite nice, although it didn’t compare to how much I loved Morning Fog.

I wanted to combine three of my favorite things into one perfume, which are books, tea, and rain, the perfect recipe. Well, it was, up until I ruined the calmness of the Rain and Tea fragrances with Book, which gave it a mustiness that might appeal to some, but left me regretting combining a third scent.

Finally, I sampled Gold on its own, because what can get better than Gold? I was really into the luxeness of the scent and was glad I decided to wear it on its own, because it definitely stands out as an individual fragerence that doesn’t need a partner in order to reach its full potential.

I am really enjoying experimenting with this kit and how it gives me the ability to be creative with my scent each and every day. If you like to experiment with beauty like I do, I think you’ll love this kit. However, if you’re more of a signature scent type of girl, I think you’ll be longing to have a full-size version of one or two of these fragrances.

I would give this kit a solid 7 out 10, with a few points knocked off because of a) the price, b) the lack of carrying case/included storage solution, and c) some scents I wasn’t fond of.

I’d love to hear about your experience with this kit if you decide to try it!