im also a wizard

Could your soft animal inside you and my soft animal inside me have a playdate tomorrow

Developing a sick fixation on the bagel guy I get breakfast from every Friday on my way to work. I have visited his stall thrice and each time he hears my order, shakes his head, and gives me a slightly different version of my order that tastes better than what I'd originally asked for

Today I asked for a plain lox spread bagel and he gave me an everything bagel with a lox, scallion, and dill spread and it fucks so heavy. Moaning at work rn

No i will not tell you who this is or where. This is MY parasocial relationship with a bagel guy who is doing a kind of customer service dom thing to me. You guys don't get to HAVE him [eyes start glowing as I growl]

You ask him out on a date and he hears your request, shakes his head, and takes you on a slightly different version of the date that feels more fulfilling than what you'd originally asked for.

Girl I'm gonna cum wtf I need this

You ask him if you can cum and he-

My hypothesis for this image has always been that taking into consideration the use of yahoo answers and the fact that they were both able to mutually think the other was a girl is that the chance they were both mid 2000s mall scene kids is insanely high

Never forget the guy who didn’t remember to hit anon before sending himself hate mail

Love that we’re still dragging the poor fuckers corpse around years later so no one ever forgets their shameful mistake lol

a few years ago it was “hehe haha what the fuck even is digital blackface why are yall so mad” now they’re using AI to make fake videos of angry black women trying to use their EBT cards in places that don’t accept it

man we gotta get regular porn back on this website