Niche Emotional Support Fantasies

But sometimes it's like, okay, this stuff is Standard for the Genre. It's doing what it says on the tin. Of course Edward's older than Bella, that's the point of a vampire romance. Of course people are turned into vampires against their will and/or to save their lives. Those are like the top two ways you make vampires.

I mean let's look at Bella, who gave the most enthusiastic, informed consent possible in regards to becoming a vampire. And yeah, it worked out great for her! But also . . . it was super boring. It was so easy for her that SM had to come up with a whole new plot about the Volturi and Immortal Children because there was no drama or conflict in Bella being the best best-adjusted vampire ever. There was no, "what have I become," no, "omg I can't believe I just drank blood," no "I'll never see Charlie or Jacob again." No conflict, no tension. Good for her, bad for drama.

If Carlisle propped up the dying Edward/Esme/Rosalie/Emmett and sat across from them at a desk with a lawyer and had them sign consent forms I guess it would be ethical but it wouldn't feel much like a vampire story. You need the "did I save you or did I damn you?" tension. You need the "I love/hate you, vampire dad." Imagine the Cullens all being like Bella, so easy, no consequences, fully informed and given a choice. It would be boring to read.

Sure Edward could have been a vampire who was just recently turned and so really was like 17 or 18 years old but again, it wouldn't really feel like a vampire story without the weight of all those decades of loneliness behind it. He'd have all the angst and ennui of Mike Newton.

1. I am their attorney. I do not work for their parent or the judge or the cops. I don’t care what any of those people want.

2. My job is to listen to them and try and make what they want happen in court. (At this point I make a joke about how most people want me to get them out of trouble but if someone wanted to be in trouble I would do my best.)

3. What they tell me is confidential. It goes nowhere unless they agree to it. (If old enough, I talk to them about mandatory reporters, and how I’m a mandatory non reporter.)

4. I will give them lots of advice because I’ve been doing court for a while and I know a lot about it, and they don’t. It’s all really complicated, and if they don’t understand what’s happening it’s my job to help them figure it out.

5. They will make the decisions. (At this point I usually have to reassure them that I’ll help, I’ll speak for them in front of the judge, and I’ve got their back. It’s scary to have an adult say you’re in charge, most of the time.)

6. I tell them I know it’s absolutely wild to have some stranger come in here and say “hey, you can trust me!” and that I get if they don’t believe everything right away, because I plan to show them through my actions and my words that I’ll fight for them.

7. But nonetheless, I will treat them like a person who can make decisions, because they are living their life and I am not.

I do not:

Pretend to be cool.

Try to be their BFF.

Overwhelm them with detail.

Let their parents in the room until the kid asks for them. (I provide openings for this, and ask if the kid wants their parent to help them remember and understand.)

I want to emphasize I went into this job knowing nothing about how to interact with vulnerable populations, especially children. The training was minimal, and my role means that I can literally walk into a facility and get an unmonitored visit with a minor client one on one.

I get up and throw it away. He forgets about it immediately and happily goes to sleep.

"The Grief of the Pasha" by Jean-Leon Gerome.

And by and large US officers seem to have ignored it. We literally have the records of every flogging (the most extreme form of punishment allowed during these specific years) onboard a naval vessel for the years of 1846-1848 and almost all of the cases that involved homosexual activity "unambiguously refer to male/male homosexual activity involving attempted assaults on children, not consensual couplings between adults."* There are also multiple recorded instances throughout the Victorian Era of an American sailor coming forward with a charge of sexual assault and pulling in other sailors or even officers as witnesses who tell their captain yeah i totally saw them and didn't say anything until this sailor told me it was nonconsensual. There are even records recorded by naval recruitment officers of men with extremely explicit gay tattoos being allowed to join the navy. Why did the US navy not care enough to even include it in the regulations while the British navy literally hanged men for it??? Were we so hard up for sailors that John Adams was like bitch we need every gay sailor we can get????

And weirdly enough this was true on American Whaling ships too! In the recorded cases where homosexual activity led to sailors being disciplined (in some cases punishment so mild as just being dropped off their ship at the next port) it was usually in situations where rape was involved and/or there was a high degree of ship disruption related to it (guys getting into a public knife fight for example). Idk I just think thats so interesting especially when America and England were so similar to be so different in this particular area is fascinating

being against arbitrary prosecution seems to have been a Thing for that guy

although its not unexpected that [tumblr] finds talking about gay sailors way more fun. anyway, here's an Adams quote taken way out of context as a little treat:

"The shortest road to men’s hearts is down their throats."

And then each character answers that question.

Robby -> You take it, compress it inside you, & and wait for it to explode. Try to make it so the explosion happens when no one else is around.

Jack -> You have to be vigilant. There is always something on the horizon. You have to give it the space to rear its ugly head and then methodically try to disarm what you can however you can.

Dana -> You do what you always do. You don’t have time for existentialism. There’s too much shit to do. Retirement is within arm’s reach anyway.

Heather -> You’re not in control of anyone but yourself, so you might as well embrace that reality.

Frank -> You’re playing an unwinnable game, so you might as well do whatever you can to get through it, or, if you can swing it, to get ahead. Life won’t stop for you, so you can’t stop for it.

Samira -> You can’t go back, and you can’t see the future. You can only be in the present. Nothing matter except the moment you’re in right now.

Mel -> You know that your ways of handling things are viewed as unconventional at best and weird at worst. But if you’re quiet and don’t draw attention to yourself, you’ll be fine.

Trinity -> You’re fucked up, and so is everyone else. But at least you’re smart enough to understand that. Anyone who says they’re not is a liar, and there is no one you hate more than a liar.

Victoria -> You can worry about what you want and need later. What you want and need isn’t important right now.

Dennis -> You can’t do everything, but you can try.

"But!" she said:

People who see a clean, trash-free river are more likely support laws to curb more harmful "systemic" forms of pollution. People who participate in river cleanups take pride in their work--their river!--and become evangelists for protecting it.

Armand: Louis was-

Daniel: *Pauses the recording*

Daniel: I’m sorry, was I talking to you? No, Louis, let me talk. Correct me if I’m wrong Armand, Amadeo or whatever the hell your name is, but the last time I checked this was “Interview with the Vampire” not “Interview with the Vampires”. Please, show me in writing where I asked for your input or opinion. Because every time I ask Louis a question, something in your prehistoric vampire muddled brain thinks that I’m talking to you. I have an idea, why don’t you take that cheap outfit of yours and those freaky halloween eyes glowing in the back of your head and get out of here? No Louis, I’m not going to calm down, because if he wants to talk, let’s talk about San Francisco………oh now everyone’s silent? That’s what I thought.

Daniel: *Resumes the recording*

Armand dressing Lestat:

Lestat dressing himself:

i did not fuck that computer with my ponis