Emil T

You know why Harry Potter is amazing? 99% of fan theories, headcanons and meta could be canon because Harry is about as observant as a brick wall. Did Slytherins come back to fight in the Battle of Hogwarts? Did Draco Malfoy enjoy crossdressing? Was Hermione transgender? Who knows, certainly not Harry

Harry didn’t notice Hermione time traveling around him for a whole year or his own teacher’s hand writing

Harry didn’t notice that he was a wizard

The glass is just gone I don’t know maybe that just happens with snakes sometimes. 

Harry didn’t notice that Malfoy was a Death Eater all along, he needed Hermione and Dumbledore to point it out

Remember to leave out milk and cookies for Captain America tonight when he comes to leave presents under your flag.

Some of my favorites: “Eternity wants you back.” “A scientist is someone who doesn’t know that he’s a scientist.” “You are a human.” “Stop being pathetic” “Where therapists fall, followers rise.” “Give shit. Get likes.” “Be the reason why someone gets spammed.” “Undress yourself in public. Don’t just dream.”

@footlooch for that thing you’re doing lmao

start referring to things you own as “your inventory”

“Jackie did I give you my keys?” “idk lemme check my inventory *rustling in purse*”

I -no shit- have referred to my purse as a quick access menu to explain why purses are gender neutral and hELLA CONVENIENT

2 dudes, chillin in open graves, 5 feet apart cause they’re not gay

This is actually an art piece by Miller & Shellabarger where they dug graves connected by a tunnel so they could hold hands. They are very much gay and irl married

they are in fact married for real

Girls who don’t lift up other girls confuse the fuck outta me

I just don’t have the upper body strength for it

Wait that’s not what you meant

Three things: 1. You gotta squat down and lift with your legs, so your upper body strength matters less. You would probably be surprised by how strong you actually are. 2. Use your “traditionally feminine” skills such as cooperation and consensus building to get that girl lifted. There is no shame in recruiting a third, or even a fourth girl to help you lift the first girl (and no shame in being a girl who requires a whole crew of girls to lift her). 3. Always get the consent of the girl being lifted. Some girls don’t like to be lifted and that’s okay.

why do so many “icarus and the sun” artworks and stories portray the sun as a woman? do y’all know who controlled the sun? apollo. icarus is gay as fuck, y’all.

Sometimes it was helios, not Apollo. Icarus was still gay as fuck

Guy getting himself killed to get some godly dick is propably the most Greek thing to ever happen in mythology

icarus: I AM SO GAY *launches self into the sun*

@firehead-dragon

This is like taking a picture of a cyclist and photoshopping the bike out and then making fun of them for being in a silly position

reblog if you DO lie in bed and stare at your palms for hours while dissociating from reality

Where’s that pic of that motorist on a like low riding motorbike or whatever but the bike had been photoshopped out and it looked like he’s farting fire because this is literally that.

... are we, Tumblr, robbing an ice cream place?

I feel like this would be a slippery slope towards making it illegal for people to choose to not vote.

that’s already how it is in australia

That’s just so fucked up. :( Do certain medical conditions exempt you?

?????? why is it be fucked up to have compulsory voting? that’s the way it is in most democratic countries? it’s a part of being a citizen, like paying taxes and obeying speed limits? the fine for not voting is only like $50 and because of the compulsory voting law, our country bends over backwards to make it accessible: it’s always on a weekend, lasts most of the day, and is set up at schools and community centers so there’s one within easy reach of almost everybody. you can also mail your ballot or vote early if you’ll be out of the country on the day. like, IT’S EASY TO VOTE, and the penalty isn’t even that ridiculous. i don’t understand why the usa doesn’t have this, except obviously it would make it harder to literally stop minorities from voting.

I think we Americans tend to forget that a lot of other countries don’t actively work to make it harder to vote.

The yiff yiff man

you won’t be laughing when he kills you

im extremely the void and homosexual