Life To You Is A Dashing, Bold Adventure!

why doesn't taylor swift write a song about how badass castlevania symphony of the night is

I WAS BORN YESTERDAY. I JUST BLEW IN FROM STUPID TOWN. THIS IS MY FIRST RODEO. PLEASE BE PATIENT WITH ME.

a friend with a boyfriend is a type of dead wife

You're stranded on a deserted island with the person on your lockscreen. How screwed are you?

Hi for the love of god hello

[ID: screenshot of a text message reading, "ok well dont ponder yourself into stagnation diva! u got this". End ID]

You're stranded on a deserted island with the person on your lockscreen. How screwed are you?

"i think therefore i am" yeah well i jerk therefore i cum #bitch

in the first episode of the original star trek series spock says "one of my ancestors married a human female" and later in the show we find out that said ancestor is in fact his dad who married his mom who is human

OH

No midroll ads and it’s just a polite man playing hitman with meditative music in the background this is actually just insane enough to be my new favorite thing to fall asleep to

“Now I will drop this man here and quietly snap his neck. The Mackerel claims its first victim” okay I’m here for life.

Hehehehehe

Can I fucking help you?

my senior english teacher told me that any scene with a woman in a cornfield in every piece of literature ever is about her journey to womanhood/pleasuring herself in the field and i just.... believed her

What

What

got told I didn't deserve to be gay because I thought lady gaga wrote money money money by abba. sorry men I am no longer attracted to you as of today. sorry abba sorry gaga sorry women sorry world