The Little Baker

today at work a little kid came in to order their birthday cake and their mom was like “(deep sigh) tell them what you want on your cake” and the kid was like “ELSA” and the mom was like “(deeper sigh) and?” and the kid was like “SHARKS” that kid literally ordered a princess elsa and sharks birthday cake and i have literally never in my whole life been more excited to see the end result of an order ive taken.

That cake is more impressive than anything I’ve seen on any of those Fantabulosity Cakes shows, oh my god.

a singular scuit. just one. 

an edible cracker with just one side. mathematically impossible and yet here I am monching on it.

when brittish colonists settled in the americas they no longer had to preserve biscuits for storage or sea voyages so instead baked them once and left them soft, often with buttermilk or whey to convert cheap staples/byproducts into filling items to bulk out the meal to make a small amount of greasy meat feed a whole family. considering hardtack biscuits were typically eaten by dipping them in grease or gravy untill they became soft enough to eat without breaking a tooth this was a pretty short leap of ‘just dont make them rock hard if im not baking for the army’ but didnt drop the name because its been used for centuries and people forgot its french for ‘twice baked’ back in the tudor era, biscuit was just a lump of cooked dough that wasnt leavened bread as far as they cared thus the buttermilk biscuit and the hardtack biscuit existed at the same time. ‘cookies’ then came to america via german and dutch immigrants as tiny cakes made with butter, sugar/molasses, and eggs before ‘tea biscuits’ as england knew them due to the new availability of cheap sugar- which is why ‘biscuit’ and ‘cookie’ are separate items in america but the same item in the UK the evolution of the biscuit has forks on its family tree

I love it when a shitpost turns into an actually interesting post.

Soft warning if this happens here or on my other blogs.