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how terrifying metamorphosis must be for the caterpillar has no concept of what it is doing, or what a butterfly is, or what will happen to it as it spins itself the cocoon. we r more alike than different

wood creaking

i cannot hate myself into a version of me i will love.

i cannot punish myself in any way that will unmake the past.

if I were a mecha show protagonist, the mid-season villains would be saying shit like "you say you hate war, yet you love to kill! the way you fight shows enjoyment, thirst for blood! you know this deep within!" and I'd go "SHUT UP!" and swing a sword at them but I would know what they say is true, to some extent

Sunflower manhole cover at the Atlanta Botanical Garden. Created by Andrew Crawford.