not a mad scientist

How do I explain Plato's allegory of the cave to my cat?

What's gayer: being gay, or whatever the fuck Elphaba, Glinda, and Fiyero have going on?

okay i know the point of contrasting glinda walking down the aisle to elphaba walking through the cages of Animals was probably a "lies in the light truth in the darkness" thing but there's a read of that choice that implies that, deep down, glinda finds heterosexual marriage as horrifying as elphaba finds Animals in cages, and that's just very, very funny

remember when u were like 11 and the only thing u wanted was a lava lamp

I overheard my 14-yo say (while petting her cat), "you raw piece of corn. You unplugged toaster. The plate is spinning, but the light isn't on."