buonasera

They just invented the world’s fastest sandwich. They’re calling it the autobáhn mì

sources are saying ohhhhhhhhh brother

I Defeated the Demon Lord but it Turns Out the Demon Army was Largely Unaffected and I Fell Victim to a Flawed Belief in Great Man Theory

I Executed The Demon Lord With One Flawless Strike And After A Brief Power Struggle The New Demon Government Is Substantially More Committed To The War Because Of Some Reason I Don't Know

DJing at the club: put your hands in the air and shake your ass a lil if you love baby animals!!!! everyone go crazy!! do it for the baby animals!!😄

alvin the chipmunk sold me a fake juul pod in the library parking lot when i was 14 and when i confronted him about it he pretended he couldn’t talk like a person anymore so everyone just thought i was yelling at a normal chipmunk. that little fucker is not normal. he can sing and dance and he can steal and cheat i hate him so much.

just put my joint out on the open mind of a child searing it and instantly destroying his ability to dream or imagine. sad but i don't care