I like that arthur asks the green knight like “so you’re coming here to compete with one of my knights?” and the green knight is like ahaha, no!! of course not!! do not be absurd!!! all I want is to play my little game :) then reveals the game is chopping each other with an axe

those posts complaining about greasy hair arent exaggerating btw, it really makes you feel like everything in your life is going wrong and falling apart. and then you shower and it turns into a normal tuesday

I'm imagining a world where RPGMaker somehow made it as the de facto codebase for software and you have to navigate your banking app by walking around in a huge room full of NPCs named "make deposit" and "make withdrawal" etc and there's loud as fuck stock music playing

eyes emoji was the perfect invention for nosy people. like 👀 whats going on over here 👀👀 i just wanna know #LetMeKnow 👀👀👀

Das Augenemoji ist die perfekte Erfindung für neugierige Leute. Einen auf 👀 was da los 👀👀 ich will doch nur mal gucken 👀👀👀 #LassenSieEsMichWissen

lmao i’m reading this essay from the 1580s that mentions how if you were wearing a big elizabethan ruff and you got caught in the rain it would flip up in the wind and hit you in the face, and then you’d have to spend the rest of the day with your stupid soggy ruff all flaccid on your shoulders. can you imagine. whole new potentials for pathetic unlocked

in hungarian one of the words for bumblebee is dongó. anyways whenever a song has the phrase "baby don't go" in its lyrics (surprisingly often), i close my eyes to savor the beautiful picture it has painted in my mind's eye. bébidongó.... baby bumblebee 🐝

Yeah okay there are like 11 species of heron native to the USA and yes fine I’ve only managed to spot 10 of those species. You might think I’m bitter about that one species evading me but I’m not. I’m actually the Least Bittern person about it in the entire world

was talking about bus ads with my coworkers yesterday and i'd only just mentioned the "reseller ads" before one of them said "yeah, the one for fucking your brother" and everyone nodded. yes yes we've all seen it

I hate when king arthur has all these fussy little steps in the instructions and you're like "no way do these fussy little steps matter" but you try it and they do. they matter so much.

I thought you meant Camelot quests and I was like "that's fair, 'never pick a four leaf clover on the last Wednesday of the month' IS a fussy little step that shouldn't matter" but then I was like "wait isn't that also a flour company"

nooo I am not a beleaguered knight of the round table I am making elaborate focaccia 😭

The term "Lustmolch" is such a banger of the German language. Yes, you're a horny pervert but you're also an amphibian while you're at it. Hilarious!