98% about the potato life

Did you know that I, award-winning speculative fiction author Natalie H. Ironside, have written like a real book that you can buy and hold physically in your hands?  Exciting!

The Last Girl Scout is a dystopian adventure story about queer hillbillies going on a big adventure in the irradiated ruins of Old America.  If you liked Fallout or S.T.A.L.K.E.R. or all things American Gothic then I got five bucks says you’ll like this.  Plus it’s got lesbians in it &and they are in love & they even hold hands.

The past lies like a nightmare over the world. Two hundred years after the War when atomic fire rained from the skies and burned the world to cinders, human civilization has had time to rebuild within the burned-out husk of Old America.  But the old terrors of the past still persist, and while some work to build a better world, others still dream of reclaiming the glory of the Old World. In southern Appalachia, political commissar Magnolia Blackadder is sent on a mission into the irradiated Exclusion Zone of Old DC, where an evil that humanity thought it had vanquished centuries ago is waking up and rebuilding its strength.  Along the way, she meets a strange woman with terrible secrets and an unspeakable past, and as they forge a bond and brave the terrors of the wasteland together, she learns that some demons are not so easily exorcised, and that some stones are better left unturned. In this her debut novel, award-winning author Natalie Ironside delivers a new vision of the post-apocalypse, a tale of adventure, terror, love, and that most basic and most powerful of all human desires:  Freedom. 

“But Natalie,” you say, “of course I want to support queer fiction and read this post-apocalyptic wasteland adventure transbian romance story, but how can I become a part of this true and amazing way?”  Well, I’ll tell you!

Buy on Amazon

Buy on Gumroad

Cashapp five bucks to $NatalieIronside and include an email address and preferred ebook file type

Subscribe to my Patreon for a download link (and that’s only $2; call that a bargain.  You’ll also get access to all sorts of other shit including my worldbuilding notes and the Christmas special)

Or message me an email address and your X number and I’ll send you an ebook for free; I call that Big Bill’s five-finger discount

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If you wanna know what other people have said about this amazing and very good hit new novel, fantasy author Dan Shepherd penned this lovely review:

And here’s an interview where I sat down with Fellow Worker Bundnik from the IWW’s Upstate New York GMB to talk about my very cool book in particular and leftist speculative fiction in general:

https://upstatenyiww.wordpress.com/2021/02/21/interview-of-fw-natalie-ironside-regarding-her-recent-novel/

Come check it out!  & I hate to be that asshole who begs for reblogs but my blog got deleted recently and I lost all my followers the which is how I primarily promote my work the which is like 1/3 of our household income I need for such extravagances as “food” and “rent so if u could reblog this post that would be very cool and sexy of you

Same thing happened when I got into fighting. I got even stronger, and I got *fast*, man, and nimble, like a cat. Still chubby.

Body-building culture is a bunch of crap, my dude. Functional muscle is not necessarily toned or lean. You can be swole as hell and still be heavy. And that’s cool.

And every damn one of those huge shredded motherfuckers has the endurance of a fucking newborn puppy. Fifteen minutes into warmups and they’re panting for air like like they’re about to die. I’ve sparred them and every one of them telegraphs their moves about two weeks in advance, and are slower than my dead grandpa because their huge useless muscles get in the damn way. 

Now. I also work with a couple of guys who are not weightlifters. They do, however, do very physical jobs and are Big Dudes. Picture this sort of build. 

No abs to speak of, a bit of a tummy, and those motherfuckers can pick up one of the weightlifters and throw them. 

And they’re fast. Like, unfair fast. 

Does the plot make sense? Eh, kind of. 

Does the timeline make sense? Not really but it doesn’t matter.

Are there some songs that do nothing to further the plot? Absolutely unless someone can justify “Does Your Mother Know” to me.