ceaseless party rocker

I often see the argument that TME/TMA is a ""false binary"". I get it- as someone who is both intersex and nonbinary, i don't like binaries either!

But this isn't the ""false binary"" you think it is (language which you (collectively) stole from intersex people talking about AGAB). TME/TMA are not identities, they don't mean "transmasc and transfem", and they don't "reduce people to their bodies", the most common misunderstandings i see. These terms ONLY describe your relationship to a particular kind of oppression, and they are both incredibly nuanced and include a lot more people than you think. Let's break it down:

TME: "Transmisogyny Exempt". This term just means you are not the PRIMARY TARGET of transmisogyny. This doesn't mean you LITERALLY have never experienced misdirected transmisogyny before (another point of confusion i see often), but that you are not the INTENDED target of it. This would include almost all people- cis men, cis women, trans men, and nonbinary people who were assigned female at birth, were raised with the expectations of femininity, and underwent feminizing puberty the first time.

TMA: "Transmisogyny Affected". This just means you are the PRIMARY TARGET of transmisogyny. This term is much more specific and includes less people- trans women, transfems, and a lot of nonbinary people who were assigned male at birth, raised with the expectation of masculinity, and underwent masculinizing puberty the first time. Anyone who had to transition AWAY from masculinity.

Now, things DO get more complex with intersex people, that's just true- a lot of us have ambiguous bodies and/or are neither AFAB nor AMAB, had this designation changed early in childhood, or do not look/were not raised in ways consistent with their original gender assignment (hence why AGAB language is unhelpful). This is how i recommend my fellow intersex people understand whether or not they're TMA, and i actually think it applies just about the same to most nonbinary people, so you should evaluate this for yourself:

If you are being faced with transmisogynistic violence, or being excluded from something due to the assumption that you are a trans woman, can you tell them you are not a trans woman, or say or do something to prove you aren't (such as showing them evidence of your AGAB)?

Can you accurately call yourself transfeminine, or a trans woman? Do you have to transition to be viewed as a woman, or fem? Have you previously lived for a long while as a man/masc/boy or otherwise non-woman in a way that would strip you of your safety or right to present as feminine?

Is the transmisogyny truly directed at you, or is it assuming something that isn't true about you or your body?

Would someone else be less safe in this situation?