You Just Lost The Game

her health bar is enormous

I’ve been watching so many old garbage movies recently that I’ve started to have like 60s sci fi themed nightmares where I’m being attacked by like horrible ape monsters and it’s actually scary as fuck! What an awful problem to have

Last night I had a dream about a terrible science experiment called Moon 13 that involved putting scantily clad women inside of large lava lamps to harness their innate psychic ability. I wish this was a joke

I’m sorry but this is the funniest thing I have ever seen ever in my fucking life her PEETS are STICKING OUT

can you lez the fuck in

welcome to my farm where I keep my dark horse my black sheep my scapegoat and my underdog. my canary in the coal mine died ages ago

It’s a mess here: someone looked your gift dark horse in the mouth, led it to water, and jumped back on it. Your ducks aren’t in a row, someone counted the chickens before they hatched. Your geese are silly, your brown cows aren’t explaining how, and every one of these sheep is a wolf but they don’t even notice with the amount of wool over their eyes. I’m fining you one million gold coins.

it was the goat blame the goat

thank you for appreciating my boobs calculator joke but the real overlooked gem of this post is rogers false elk. basically this entire post was just an excuse to come up with a hypothetical monster called rogers false elk. its just so pleasing to me. does nobody care him? does nobody but me care for rogers false elk?

"less is more" is a lie perpetuated by big small to sell more less

They start with the anime titty, but they never stop there. Censorship is a ship that tosses a few overboard but never tells you the plan is to drown everyone on it.

Censorship is a ship that tosses a few overboard but never tells you the plan is to drown everyone on it.

youve heard of missionary position. now get ready for MERCENARY position

"i have no right to complain". who took it from you!? i'll defeat them...