not all those who wander are lost

she's got places to be

She took a midnight train going anywhere

omg the girlies

omg the girls are saviiiiiiiing wiiiildliiiiife

Not all heroes wear capes. Or trousers.

that’s mozilla herself

you are morally ethicallyand spiritually obligated. to think about gay sex on the clock

three fun and sexy facts about me: 1.) i have a slight fructose intolerance which manifests itself mostly in me getting violently ill whenever i eat garlic. 2.) i have “delayed phased sleep disorder” aka my body wants to sleep during the day and stay up at night. 3. i am extremely sensitive to sunlight and cannot be in direct sunlight for more than like five minutes without getting burned or overheated.

extra bonus fun and sexy fact: the one and only time i stepped foot in a catholic church, someone spilled hot coffee on me and i got a bad burn on my chest and had to leave before the service started

unrelated: i think i might start taking classes to become a phlebotomist 

wait i gotta google something

yeah this is funny

imagine cloth mother and wire mother in family court competing for custody of the baby monkey

I Have Softness For You

i have milk for you

Stop.

Cut the baby monkey in half

All good My Little Pony names sound either like euphenisms for gay people or euphenisms for hard drugs. You could've had a pony with a handlebar moustache named Fruit Garland and his energetic wife Sparkle Snow and nobody would've even blinked. Due to the sparkle snow.

fries. envelopes. ive been awake for 18 hours can i go to bed now.

you know i think the fact that friends and enemies autocorrected to this and i didn't notice is reason enough i should sleep

has anyone noticed recently that it's expensive

times like these really make you appreciate pouring river water in your socks