okay on jeremy and shibari:
i know we as a fandom have discussed if/how jeremy likes a bit of pain with his pleasure during sex. i’m not sure whether he does this with his hook ups as further self harm because what’s more punishing than having someone use your body and not care about you as a person? letting them hurt you. or if he does this because he genuinely enjoys a serving of pain with his pleasure. or maybe it started as the former and he grew to enjoy it. who knows.
but functioning under the assumption that jeremy does genuinely enjoy the pain, that means jean has to enjoy delivering pain. and for the most part, i struggle to see that happening. i can see jean being comfortable and enjoying things like slamming jeremy into a wall or fucking him into a counter so hard it leaves him bruises on his hips. and i can see jean coming to enjoy leaving hickies and bite marks and scratches as he heals from grayson. but i don’t think jean as he is right now would be comfortable actually hitting jeremy in any capacity or choking him. especially because he claws at his own throat so much and struggles to breathe. i don’t think he would be comfortable making jeremy experience that even if he knows jeremy is asking for it and consenting to it. and that’s okay. people don’t have to be 100% compatible to have good chemistry in bed or to enjoy sex.
however, this got me thinking about how jerejean would find ways to satisfy jeremy’s urge for pain in a capacity that jean is comfortable with. and i thought of shibari.
it’s not inherently painful on the surface level but there are aspects that would ache and i think jeremy would find that he enjoys it for other reasons unrelated to its potential for making him hurt. being tied up would force jeremy’s body into one position for a while. his muscles would have to stay in that position, usually one requiring a bit of flexibility and folding, and after a bit, his muscles would start to ache from the required constant flexion. that plus the bite of rope on his bare skin would give him a different flavor of pain than he is used to but maybe it could satisfy that urge.
i think that baseline would be enough for jeremy to want to try it but i believe other aspects of it would have jeremy wanting more.
shibari is very much a practice of trust and vulnerability with your partner. it is placing full control in your partner to tie you up and a lot of the time suspend you. it’s about that trust and the connection between the people involved and letting go of control. there would be no way for jeremy to maintain control. he would have to place his full trust in jean. and i think that between being captain and being under surveillance of his team, his coaches, his family, and everyone at school (even if the reasons people are watching him are different, he is almost constantly being watched), he would have trouble getting out of his mind and just letting go. but trying to remain in control when you’re being tied up is practically impossible. the more you fight against the ties, the more they dig into your skin and become uncomfortable. so he would have to learn to relax into it. being tied up, through that process, jeremy could finally give up his control and learn to be in a position where he is not worrying about anyone else. he’d place his full well being and the responsibility for his pleasure in jean’s hands.
i think it would offer jeremy a prolonged period of time when he could just focus on the sensation of rope on his skin, the flex of his muscles, jean’s hands on him and nothing else. and i think that the intimacy and comfort from that alone would be pleasurable to him. sure, jean could tie him up to fuck him but i think the two of them would enjoy the process without overt sexual stimulation too.
a lovely addition from @homiesgottahop that i got in the comments on my other post and just had to include :
Shibari is known for making people feel secure and with how often his family is throwing him off his rhythm or is making him feel insignificant or uncomfortable in their abusive relationships it’s going to be one of the only places where Jeremy feels physically comfortable or secure and it also plays into part with how he only really feels free enough with Jean to explore the freedom of their relationship and feel secure enough to be himself
